I wished I hadn’t mentioned it, but I wasn’t going to lie. “They offered me a date in two weeks, but it’s in the middle of Rocktoberfest, so I couldn’t make it. November was the next available.”
“Oh, hell no.” Lee poked my chest with his finger. “You’re not playing those games with your health. First thing Monday morning you call them and tell them you’ll take the early date.”
I stepped back. “Excuse me? Who made you the boss? Anyhow, it’s probably not available anymore. They were booking up fast.”
“Aargh!” Lee knotted his fingers in his hair. “If so, you ask them to put you on a wait list. Cancel Rocktoberfest and tellthem you can come in any day, any time, first available. Take care of your goddamned life!”
“You’re making a big fucking deal out of this.”
“Because itisa big fucking deal. Do you know the survival statistics for squamous cell carcinoma once it metastasizes? A tumor can kill you.”
“It’s a polyp. A nothing. The doctor was pretty sure.”
“If she was really sure, she wouldn’t have scheduled a biopsy.” Lee yanked on his hair, then knuckled his eyes. “Look, Griff, for me? Do this for me if you won’t do it for yourself. I saw Alice deal with a dozen major health crises that started minor but there was nothing we could do to prevent them. You have a chance for prevention. Or at least early intervention. Fucking take it!”
“I’m not cancelling Rocktoberfest. I’m committed. Pete and his band are practicing my songs. The tickets are sold and I won’t renege on a commitment.”
Lee’s lips twisted. “How many of the fans are going to the Fest just to see you? There’s lots of other bands. They won’t miss you that much.”
My breath whooshed out of my lungs like I’d been punched. I felt dizzy and my chest ached. “Oh, nice. So glad you support my work.”
“I didn’t mean it like that.” He glared at me. “I meant one concert isn’t worth dying for.”
“And keeping my word? Not to mention the money. My health insurance is shit. I have a six-thousand-dollar deductible before it pays a penny, and because it’s based in California, everything here is out of network. If I need surgery, I’ll need that money.”
“Are you lecturing me about medical debt? Seriously? Mom lost everything but the house before the state began covering Alice. But weneverput money ahead of her health.”
“How nice for you,” I drawled.
“Fuck you. There are other ways to get money. Admit it. Even now, you can’t put your health or me and my heart above performing as Griffin Marsh, the rock star.”
“This isn’t about you!”
The cold, dead look in Lee’s eyes as he stepped away made me want to call back those words. “No, I guess it isn’t. I guess I don’t matter enough to be part of your real life.”
“I didn’t mean it that way.”
“I don’t care. It’s obvious. I’m not sticking around to watch you play stupid games with your life. You want to stick your head in the sand and play the ‘it’s just a polyp’ game? You want to put a cheering crowd ahead of medical advice? You do that. But don’t expect me to hang around for the crash. I’m gone.” He whirled and stomped to the door.
“Lee, wait!” I held out a hand. My fingers trembled and my vision blurred.
He eyed me like I was a rotting piece of fish. “Will you skip Rocktoberfest?”
“Maybe I don’t have to,” I babbled. “It’s just a few days. Maybe I can get a wait-list biopsy slot some other time.”
“Are you going to California on Friday and singing for a week?”
I didn’t say anything because the answer had to be yes. Pete and Chaser Lost were expecting me.
“That’s what I thought.” Lee shook his head. “You’re never going to put anything ahead of performing, are you? I was a fool to think you might.” He opened the door, slipped through with an agility that belied his size, and was gone.
“Wait.” The word caught in my throat and I wasn’t sure he heard it. Either way, his footsteps thudded off down the hall.
Wait…
I sank into a chair, feeling like I’d been whiplashed. How did I go from on top of the world to Lee charging out the door? My whole body ached, like the verbal blows he’d landed had been physical.
Surely he’d be back any minute. Surely he’d realize that asking me not to do Rocktoberfest for his ridiculous paranoia—what if it’s not paranoia?I shushed that obnoxious inner voice. Lee had to see he was asking too much. I’d promised to stop touring. I’d told him I was putting down roots in the community.
