Another chuckle. “No.”
“Are you trying to score serious drugs?”
He makes a face. “No way.”
I sigh. “Those are the big ones I’d have to share. What’s up?”
He moves a rock around on the ground with the toe of his cowboy boot, then looks up at me. “Jo Jo wants to have sex.”
The way my chest goes concave at the gravity of it all in this moment; that Rawley and Jo Jo haven’t had sex yet (because honestly, I kind of assumed they had), how much thought he’s clearly given it (impressed me) and the fact that he’s come tome.
“Are you feeling like you’re not ready? Or do you think she’s not ready?” I ask, taking a stab at what the issue could be. I don’t teach health, but Riley Rivers Turner does, and I read her article in the paper a few months ago. Usually, according to her, teens that lose their virginity in high school aren’t actually ready, and are pressured into it.
He shrugs. “I mean, I’m in love with Jo Jo, even though, you know, I don’t tell her.”
At that, I have to laugh because men of all ages reallyarecut from the same cloth. “Why don’t you tell her?”
Now his face goes red. Sex doesn’t make him blush, but love chatter does. Interesting.
“I’m scared she won’t say it back, and that it will mess everything up,” he admits. “Well, and, I don’t know. I don’t wanna take the next step unless we’re for real, you know? Sleeping together is serious.”
“I agree,” I tell him, absolutely amazed by his maturity. “Why is she eager to do it?”
“All her friends have had sex and they tease her about being a virgin,” he tells me. “I mean, I think she loves me, butI wanna do it because we’re in love, not because some girl on the cheer squad is a bully, you know?”
I nod. “I do, and I agree with you. My advice is to talk to her. Tell her what you told me. Tell her that you want to take the next step because of how you feel about her, not because everyone else is doing it.” I scratch my jaw, trying to think about what Clara June might say. “If everyone else jumped off a bridge, would she?”
Rawley laughs. “You sound like my mom.” Then he takes a moment, staring through me as he considers my advice. “Yeah, I should just talk to her, you’re right.”
“Don’t take that step unless it’s what you both want. That’s the important thing.”
A week later, Rawley approaches me while I’m elbow deep in potting soil in the backyard. “I told her.”
“Huh?”
“I told Jo Jo, you know, that I love her.”
I nod, and smile when it clicks in place. “Good, man. How’d it go?”
His smile is from ear to ear. “She said it back. And she said she wants to wait, too.”
Another week later, he asks me for condoms, just in case. That same week, Archie asks me to come to career day at his school because “all the other dads do.” And to really sock me in the emotional nuts and test my ability to blink away a cry, Tanner is featured in the Leader again, this time, citingmeas his mentor and hero.
And the week after that, Clara June tells me she’s late.
EPILOGUE
DEAN
Three YearsLater
“That’s the last one,” I tell Rawley as I lower a cardboard box to the floor.
“Thanks, Dean,” he says, offering me a beer from the avocado colored fridge. I can’t help but eye him.
“How might a 20 year old be buying beer?” Iask, popping the top off the side of the counter, taking a swig. Clara June appears in the doorway, a box in her arms.
“Here, son, this was in my car. This is the official last one.”
