Every few minutes while we’re eating, Chase’s hand wanders onto my lap, squeezing my thigh. Each time, it gets a little higher. It’s not long before he leans over and whispers in my ear, “You’re killing me in this dress, my queen. I want to rip it off you and fuck you right here on the table.”
I hold my hand over my mouth and giggle. I push his hand off my leg, I reply, “You have guests, Mr. Cooper.”
“I lied before. I like it when you call me that. Especially in that teacher’s voice you use.” He cocks his head to the side. “Besides, they wouldn’t give a shit. They’ll be fucking in the back room before the night’s over. They’re part rabbit.”
“Oh, and you’re not?”
“That’s fair,” he chuckles. “Can I ask you something?”
I nod, a little concerned about his tone.
“How expensive was that dress?”
“I’m not sure. Dani picked it out.” I furrow my brow. “Why?”
His mouth curls into a wicked grin, and now I can guess what’s coming.
“Chase, do not!”
It’s too late, though. He’s hoisting me into the air and making a break for the pool. I yell about my shoes and Lexi catches up in time to pull them off my feet before Chase leaps into the pool with me. I should be livid. If any other man had tried that, I would bury him in the backyard. But when I come up, gasping for air, he’s there, cupping my face and smiling at me. I can’t hold back the laughter, and I wouldn’t want to. The dress was cheap; the makeup wasn’t, but none of that matters. The way he makes me feel, the way he opens my heart to pour his feelings into it, is worth so much more. I’ve spent so much time worried about him falling for me that I didn’t realize I had fallen hard for Chase Cooper.
He pulls my face to his and kisses me with a fierceness I’ve never experienced before. It’s fiery and passionate, with so much meaning behind it. “Too much?” He asks as we float together.
“No,” I whisper timidly.
“Good,” he sighs as our noses brush together. “I thought you’d hate me for that.”
CHAPTER19
LUNCH
BILLIE EILISH
Two years ago,my best friend met a woman and fell in love in less than a week. I gave him so much shit for that. Within weeks, we were all piled in a car and headed to Vegas to watch the two of them get married. They’re still happy and going strong.
A few months ago, I saw the same thing happen to one of my other best friends, though not as fast. Steve and Ethan have their difficulties, but I pity anyone that ever tries to get between them. They’re talking about starting a family now.
Dani and Xander got together in high school, and those two are their own special mess. They’ve been experimenting with becoming a triad, and break up every six months. But when the dust settles, they’ve still got each other.
Which leaves me. There’s a pang of jealousy when I watch them, but over the last few months, that pang has grown into a pit in my stomach. Until I met her.
After I threw us both in the pool, the look she gave me shocked my brain into catching up with what my heart already knew. I get it now. How people fall so hard and so fast when they find their person. That’s what’s happening to me. Not as fast as Jamie and Lexi, but that’s alright, because we’re working at our own speed.
But what am I supposed to do now? What if she decides she doesn’t want me for anything but an occasional fuck? She doesn’t see a future between us; I’ve found heaven and possibility in her eyes. I’ve always been a little extra in relationships. What if my inability to let go caused these feelings? I just wish my brain would shut up for two seconds and let me enjoy this moment with her instead of overthinking it.
“Chase, I?—”
She’s going to leave me. She hates me. She’s going to break all of this off. She knows I’m only going to hurt her.
“JAMES GRAHAM BARTON, DON’T YOU FUCKIN—” Lexi doesn’t get the rest out before they’re in the pool with us. I can’t remember the last time I laughed this much, and I’m understanding the ebbs and flow Doc told me about. Holding a little space for Cassie, but not drowning in her memories. Building something new and not letting my past become the foundation for it all.
Of course, I’ve just jumped into the pool with Ren, soI’m already trying to sabotage the entire thing. Part of me expected to be punched in the dick as soon as she came up for air. Instead, she’s looking at me and laughing that beautiful laugh. The kiss that follows would have knocked me off my feet if I were standing instead of floating.
There’s the tiniest hope she’s the one. It’s kind of fucked that it finally hits home on the anniversary of my fiancée’s death. Life has one fucked up sense of humor.
“Jerk!” Lexi yells with a laugh, splashing water at Jamie and me.
I’m about to swim over and dunk her under when I notice Lulu jump up and run inside. Devin must be home. There’s a loud crash inside the house, and our heads all turn to hear my brother yell out.
