Seeing Nate’s confused look, I elaborated. “I just wanted to know if the disease was sexually transmitted. Like, could I pass it to someone if I, uh, you know? I have a boyfriend,” I lied, “and I need to know what to tell him.”
Nate didn’t need to know I was single. It was none of his business. Still, it was weird saying the word. My mind had already started to disentangle itself from Rick.
At the mention of a ‘boyfriend,’ Nate’s eyes grew cold, and he turned away. I couldn’t tell if he was annoyed or upset. Maybe hearing I was with someone else made him feel like shit for flirting with me earlier. Perhaps he had a moral code against trying to hook up with unavailable women? That would be nice.Lots of guys had no qualms about that. Nate might be more honorable than I’d first assumed.
Keeping his eyes averted, Nate said, “You can live your life normally. Sex is fine. Any side effects would happen later.”
“Side effects? What side effects?” More fear and uncertainty made my lungs constrict, and I struggled to breathe.
Nate turned to me, concern filling his eyes. “Hey, it’s okay. Calm down.”
“How the hell can I calm down? I’ve been infected with… with…whateverthis shit is that you and Ollie won’t fucking tell me about.”
He squeezed my shoulder. “Hey, Cameron, look at me. Look at me.”
I did as he asked. That connection, staring into those deep gray eyes, actuallydidsteady me a bit. The panic receded.
“First of all,” Nate said, his voice low and calm, “the idea that this mugger was contagious or has a disease is just theoretical at this point. Nothing has been proven one way or another. Second, if it is what we think, then it’s not a pleasant disease, but it’s not life-threatening. You and your loved ones can go on living as you normally did. All right?”
“Well, what are some of the side effects? Can you at least tell me that?”
“I’m not a doctor,” Nate said. “I wouldn’t feel comfortable going into all that. What you need to do is stay calm, live your life. If and when we know more, Ollie will tell you everything.”
Regardless of how little he’d actually told me, his words calmed me. I was sure the weight of his hand on my shoulder and those eyes had a lot to do with it. That, along with his deep voice, helped settle my heart rate and ease the anxiety bubbling within my chest. Nate was being honest with me—I could see it in his eyes. There was nothing he was saying that he didn’t believe himself.
“The test should only take forty-eight hours, tops,” Nate added.
Two days? I supposed I could manage that. Surely I could keep from freaking out for a couple of days.
“Fine. Forty-eight hours,” I said. “But not a second longer. I’ll be bugging the shit out of Ollie until I hear something.”
“Fair enough,” he said, and patted the seat behind him. “Let’s get you back to work.”
Staring at the bike again, my fear returned. I’d never even sat on a motorcycle, much less ridden on one. Maybe it would be easier to just take the bus or something.
“Cameron? Get on the damn bike,” Nate said wryly.
“What if I just had you follow me in a cab or—hey, what are you doing? Let go of me!”
Moving as swiftly as a dancer, he got off his bike and scooped me up, setting me on the back in one smooth motion. His movements, so precise and graceful, stunned me. He’d lifted me like I weighed nothing. It sent a confused little thrill through my stomach—a much more pleasant sensation from the nausea I’d been experiencing.
As he swung his leg over the bike and revved the engine, I quickly put on the helmet. He pulled away slowly, and I searched for something to hold on to before he got up to speed.
“What do I hold? How do I stay safe on this thing?!” I shouted.
He reached back and grabbed my hand, then pulled it around his waist.
I wrapped my other arm around him and pressed against his back, feeling more secure but still terrified. Once we were out of the hospital parking lot, Nate gunned the engine. The bike rocketed down the highway, and I screamed. I tightened my grip on Nate and squeezed my eyes shut as the wind cascaded around me like the raging waters of a river.
Nate’s body shuddered beneath my arms in what could only be a chuckle. The buzz of the engine grew louder, and I felt us going even faster. I wanted to keep my eyes shut, but my innate curiosity finally got the best of me, and I opened them. My scream of terror turned into a laugh of delight. My fear slowly ebbed away as I realized how expertly Nate handled the bike.
He bobbed and weaved through traffic in a way that should have been crazy, but nothing had ever felt as liberating. I imagined this was what birds felt like when they flew across the sky, untethered and free.
The CN Tower stood out in the distance, a sharp needle in the Toronto skyline. Nate cruised along the Humber River, and the smell of the water reminded me of a stream that had run through Zamora when I’d been a child. Begrudgingly, I had to admit, this was the most fun I’d had in a reallylong time. Resting my head against Nate’s back, I watched the world race past. His body heat seeped into my chest and stomach, staving off the chill of the wind.
All too soon, the buildings grew closer, rising up and becoming more familiar. Eventually, he slowed and pulled into a parking spot half a block from my office. My breathing was heavy and rapid, as though I’d just run a race… or had the best sex of my life.
My cheeks heated. Part of me wondered if I should tell Nate I’d broken up with Rick. I quickly shook that thought away, a little intimidated by where it might lead.
