“And hecried? Henevercries.”
Jake told himself to remain calm. Pam may have been a Ryan expert, but she didn’t know he smoked marijuana and she would disapprove heartily. He had tried pot in college, and she hadn’t even tried it. His wife took seriously the fact that she was a judge and had sworn an oath to uphold the law. Plus she believed marijuana turned kids into underachievers, which in her mind, was practically criminal. Jake reminded himself to get back on track with the story. “He cried from the stress, I guess. I shouted at him. I lost my temper.”
“You?” Pam blinked. “You never lose your temper.”
“I do sometimes.”
“Okay, whatever.” Pam shrugged, but Jake didn’t want to remind her of the night he’d lost his job, when he’d thrown his laptop across the kitchen and cracked the screen. It wasn’t even under warranty.
“Anyway, he pushed my buttons.”
“Did you call him names? Remember, you’re not supposed to call names.”
“Of course not, I don’t call names.” Jake knew from therapy that name-calling was against the rules, like the Geneva Convention of marriage.
“I don’t understand something. Was this in the car or the diner?”
“Was what?” Jake lost his train of thought again. He kept thinking of the woman, how horrible she had looked, lying there.
“The fight,” Pam was saying. “Did you have it in the car or the diner?”
What diner?“In the car.”
“After a fight like this, you went to the diner?”
Jake realized it sounded implausible. “Yes,” he answered anyway.
“He went along with that?” Pam recoiled, surprised. “I would think he’d be embarrassed. He’d been crying. What if he ran into someone he knew? Everybody knows who he is, from the team. You can’t miss him, he’s built like a lighthouse.”
“That’s what he said, but I insisted on it. He cleaned himself up in the car. I always have those Wet Wipes in the console, for when I eat in the car.” In truth, Jake was the one who cleaned up using the Wet Wipes. There had been blood on his face and hands. He’d driven away from a hit-and-run, thrown away the Wet Wipes and the marijuana in a Dumpster, and taught their son that dishonesty was the best policy. Jake didn’t know himself anymore. This wasn’t him.
“Why’d you want to go to the diner? You mean Mason’s?”
“Yes, Mason’s.” Jake realized he’d just trapped himself. He was a terrible liar. His heart beat wildly in his chest, as if it wanted to escape his very body.
“But you hate Mason’s. Every time I ask you to go, you say no.”
“I know, but you and Ryan love it, and I thought we could sort things out better there.”
“In public?” Pam didn’t look suspicious, merely critical. “Why didn’t you come home? I could’ve helped.”
Think!“I know, that’s the problem. If we came home, we would have looked to you to settle it, like Judge Mom. I didn’t want that. We had to do this on our own, just the two of us.”
“Really.” Pam nodded, with a new half smile. “So you went to Mason’s because I wasn’t there?”
“Honestly, yes. I have to find my own way with him. That’s the goal, right?” Jake felt he had turned a corner, inadvertently saying something that made complete sense, however false. Still it brought him no satisfaction or relief.
“Exactly.”
“You keep saying you can’tfacilitatemy relationship to him. The therapist said that too.”
“True.”
“So I tempted him with a cheeseburger, and we got over it.”
“Wow.” Pam brightened, genuinely happy, which only made Jake feel horrible.
“So it’s over. We solved it.”
