“My friend Trey. They’re not a hacker, but they helped me set up an alert.”
There was so much wrong with that Kia didn’t know where to begin. What kind of alert? Why did Deja need an alert? Why did Deja always introduce Trey asnot a hacker?
“Don’t worry. It was just a Google Alert to see how the food pod was going, so I could help if you needed me, and I was checking to see if your accounts came back. Then I saw some stuff about Mega Eats. It’s so wrong. I mean, anyone who sees you two can see that this is what love looks like! Hashtag ‘relationship goals.’ And hello, Mega Eats is serving a side of homophobia. A gay marriage isn’t real because blah, blah, blah. You couldn’t possibly want to marry a hot woman you’ve been in love with since you were twenty and—” Deja stopped. “Sorry. I talk too much. I am ready to help. What do you need?”
“Do you have any friends who are into the environment or hate capitalism?”
“Oh my god, do I have any friends whodon’tlove the environment and hate capitalism? No, no I do not.”
“I need some publicity around an issue.”
Deja didn’t say a word as Kia described the lawsuit and the snake.
“Sullivan says it shouldn’t matter whether people like an animal. If it’s endangered it’s endangered, even if it’s hideous.”
“The miniature tree snake isgorge. But I get it. You need people to rally for the snake.”
“Yeah.”
“Like arally!” Talkative Deja was back. “We’ll get local food trucks to serve food. And I can get your friend’s burlesque troupeto make snake costumes. And I know some anarchists that—”
“Maybe no anarchists.”
“Okay, no anarchists, but we’ll get—” Deja hesitated, probably googling. “People from the Mount Hood Environmental Front, and the Urban Green group.” Deja listed a dozen other groups, ranging from the obviously environmental to the bud-tenders union. “Do you think Saturday or Sunday? Maybe we can have a drag show. All snake themed. Barb, Mike, Benny, Greg, and Mira will totally be on board.”
“Barb, Mike…?”
“The board. You know. The white people with woke water bottles.”
That basically described all of Portland. Maybe all of Portland would come.
There was one more thing. Kia took a deep breath.
“Deja, I need to tell you something. I don’t want you to feel like I didn’t tell you because I didn’t trust you.”
“Okay,” Deja said.
“What Mega Eats said about us just getting married to get the land deal… that was partly true. And I’m sorry I let you believe that and call us hashtag ‘relationship goals.’ I should have trusted you with the truth.”
“But you’ve been in love with her since school, and she has been too, but she didn’t realize that she was in love with you too until she saw you again.” Deja recited the words like an article of faith.
“That’s just what we told people.”
“No, that’s whatItoldyou.”
“What?”
“I saw the video of your kiss at graduation. Total fire. You don’t kiss someone like that and just forget them. I saw the wayyou and Sullivan looked at each other. Legit from day one. Whatever youthoughtyou were doing getting married, I know you did it for Sullivan. You didn’t have to buy the Bois to save Sullivan from Mega Eats. You could have gone anywhere. Your investors didn’t say it had to be the Bois.”
“The Bois was a good deal.”
“Since when has getting sued by Mega Eats been a good deal? You did it because you want Sullivan in your life.”
“Are you hurt that I didn’t tell you?”
“A little.” Deja’s voice dipped toward sadness, then perked up again. “But you don’t share your business. I get it. Half your life is online, you don’t want to spill the tea after that.”
“How did you know I was in love with Sullivan?”
