Her heart was pounding now, and she was so terrified that she needed to count to at least a hundred before she would feel better. But the blood rushing in her ears and the warm zing of Valentine’s touch on her cheek made it impossible to think. She could not even remember her numbers. She knew three was a number, but what came before?
Valentine tilted his head down so that his eyes were level with hers. “What you do not understand is that you will come to my bed willingly. You want me as much as I do you.”
She shook her head, not managing to move away from him at all. Instead, she actually worked her cheek against the rough palm of his hand. She felt his calluses against the skin of her face and wondered how they would feel on other parts of her body. Lord, Valentine was right. She did want him.
“I don’t want you,” she lied. “Last night, I was tired. I was not myself.”
He put a finger over her lips. “Last night your defenses were down, and you acted on your true impulses. You are afraid of men. How could you not be after living with a man such as your father?”
She felt as though a fist slammed into her belly, the shock and surprise so real she hunched over. “B-but that was just a dream. It wasn’t real.”
The finger pressed against her lips again. “You don’t have to lie to me, Catie. You don’t have to pretend with me.”
Catherine took a deep breath and looked away.
Valentine’s hand stroked her cheek. “He hurt you, didn’t he?”
“No!”
“Locked you in a closet.”
“I never said that.”
“Not with words, no. But I need to know what to believe. Tell me the truth, did your father force you into this marriage?”
“I already told you—”
“I need to hear it again. The truth.”
Catherine clenched her jaw. How many times did she need to prove herself? She was tired of defending her innocence. “I told you the truth, and I don’t care if you believe me. Lord knows I’m used to being doubted.”
Tears stung her eyes and spilled onto her cheeks. Valentine reached forward to wipe them away. “You’re right. I should trust you. I’m sorry I doubted you before. You’re not a liar.” He lowered his head so that his forehead touched hers. “How can I make you see that there’s more to the world than the way you grew up? How can I show you that there can be tenderness between a man and a woman? And there can be passion. It can be so exciting you forget to breathe. I can make you forget to breathe.”
“No.” She began to withdraw, and Valentine caught her hand.
“I know you’re afraid of men. You protect your emotions because you had to survive with your father. But I’m not your father.”
She shook her head, unable to put her fears into words. She’d never felt so close to anyone as she’d felt to him last night. She’d never needed anyone as she’d needed him. But she didn’t deserve him or his promises of happiness and security. She’d never felt truly safe or happy. She didn’t know what it was to have that.
“You’re my wife,” Valentine said. “I want you in my bed. I want you in every way a man wants a woman. Let me show you how it can be.”
“No.”
“Yes. Don’t you think you deserve pleasure and happiness? Don’t you think you’re worthy enough?”
She stared at him, wondering how he’d managed to read her innermost thoughts.
But Valentine was looking into her eyes, and his own softened at what he saw. He released her hand and cupped her cheeks with both of his hands. She allowed it, though his touch unsettled her. “You are so beautiful and so strong. Look at the misfortunes the world has dealt you, and yet you approach every new challenge as though it were an adventure. Let me show you how you deserve to be treated.”
“No.” She tried to pull away again, and he allowed it. “No, I don’t want you to touch me.”
“Very well then.” He held his hands out in a gesture of surrender. “You kiss me.”
She’d been slowly backing away, but at his suggestion, she stopped.
“I won’t touch you,” he promised. “I won’t even kiss you back, if you don’t allow it. I’ll be completely at your mercy, under your command.”
Catherine bit her lip and considered. Inadvertently, her eyes went to his lips. They were well shaped, full, with a hint of color. Last night they’d been warm and firm.
