“Not even a little bit.” Smiling, she straightens and I’m a little in awe of how animated she gets when she speaks. “I don’t know a lot about dogs, but I know pugs and Frenchies snore. A lot. The pug is a noisy little thing, and even though she is so damn cute, I’m not sure I’m going to be feeling that when I’m trying to sleep. And I love to sleep, Ash! Love it! And I love it even more in a bed that is actually big enough to sprawl out like a starfish! You know what you can’t do in a twin bed? Sprawl!”
I’m about to offer to swap rooms with her because I can sleep anywhere and I’m totally fine with sharing a room with Roxie as a friend, but that might make me sound creepy.
But it comes out anyway.
“Do you want my room instead? I’m okay with a twin bed, and I don’t think Roxie will mind.”
She whips off her sunglasses and stares at me like I’ve lost my mind and leans forward almost menacingly.
“Ash, there is no way you are going to share a room with Roxie. It doesn’t matter how platonic the two of you are; that’s not going to happen. She is one of my best friends and she kind of has a lot of negative feelings toward your gender right now. There is no way I would subject her to that. I would be a total ass if I did.”
I stammer as I try to think of a response, but again, she beats me to it.
“But thank you for offering. That was very sweet.”
Talking with Olivia is a little like a roller coaster ride in the dark; you have no idea where the next dip or turn is going to be.
“So, um…what do you think of the plans for dinner?” I ask, eager to move on to another topic.
“I’m all for not going out tonight and having a casual night in and grilling. I think after the long drive and all the unpacking, we deserve a quiet night. Plus, burgers out on the deck, some wine, and then the hot tub? It’s almost like paradise. According to Loren, Mike is the king of grilling, but you probably know that.”
I nod. “He is, and he takes it very seriously. We’ve all learned to keep our distance when he’s in charge because none of us knows what we’re doing.”
Her shoulders sag slightly, and her smile dims. “I’m a little envious of you again.”
“For…?”
“I moved away, and I didn’t regret it until…well…now.”
“Seriously? All because of Mike’s grilling skills?” I’m making light of it to help the mood.
Her smile starts to reappear. “I used to know these people like I knew myself. But now? Now there are things I know nothing about—inside jokes, shared experiences and stories—and I feel like an outsider.” When I go to comment, she holds up a hand to stop me. “Again, I made the decision to move, and for my career, it was the right thing. I just didn’t expect to miss so much.”
Damn. I have nothing to say to that. Not really.
Except…
“I travel a lot for work. Like…a lot. Sometimes I’m gone for a week, sometimes a month. When I get home, I try to catch up with everyone, but I miss a lot too. Loren, Mike, Van, and Zayne? They do everything together. There’s no way to keep up with it all because they’re like a unit that goes everywhere. I know I’ve felt like an outsider with them as well. Roxie hasn’t been around much since the divorce, but I’m sure she’d agree.” I shrug. “But I have other friends I hang out with too, so this group isn’t like…exclusive to me. Does that make sense?”
“It does, and thank you. I really wanted this time to reconnect. Like I was telling you on the plane, my writing career is at a crossroads, and I wanted the time with the girls to try to work through things, but that’s kind of selfish of me.”
It’s not the first time she’s said that about herself.
“Liv, I realize you and I don’t know each other well, but you don’t come across as being selfish. If anything, you’re the total opposite. You could have told Mrs. Serrano that you didn’t want to speak at Matt’s funeral because he was a total dick who really hurt you, but you didn’t. You could have pitched a fit and demanded to have your own room here at the house, but you didn’t. You may think these things, but you’re an adult and you think things through before you act on them. At least, that’s what I’m seeing. You don’t think everyone has those same thoughts? I can almost guarantee that you weren’t the first person Mrs. Serrano asked, but you were the only one who agreed.”
“Damn, Sebastian,” she says as she leans back, her slender arms stretching out along the railing. “That was a bit savage. I thought you and Matt were friends.”
“We were,” I quickly explain. “But I was well aware of his faults. You don’t room with a guy and not pick up on the red flags.”
Part of me feels guilty even speaking of Matt this way because I owe him a lot, but that doesn’t change the fact that I also witnessed a lot of shitty behavior on his part. Some people say he was charming, but most of the time I likened it to him being a narcissist who preyed on women. There was a different girl every day, and I can count on one hand the number of times where I saw a serious side of him where he showed any remorse or regrets.
One of those times, he mentioned Olivia by name.
The only reason I remember that is because it was the only time I truly believed he regretted his actions.
Not that I would ever share that with her. That’s not my place and I have a feeling it would cause more pain than good.
“I’m having a hard time imagining the two of you being friends,” she says after a long moment. “Like you said, we don’t know each other well, but knowing what I do about you and knowing what I do about Matt, you two are the ultimate odd couple.”
