Sierra ached to beg him to step away from the deal. To fight. To tell Stealth to fuck off and that Flirt was more important than their stupid luxury resort. But of course, she knew she was reacting with her heart—not her head. If she ordered Kane to do her bidding, she’d always wonder if there’d be regrets.
She’d always wonder if she’d been second choice.
“I can’t. I think you need to do what you feel, Kane. If you say no, you’re closing yourself off from bigger opportunities. You may not get another chance like this.” Her chest tightened but she pushed on. “This is important to you. You’ve built your entire life around being successful in this field. It’s how you define yourself.”
“Like Flirt is to you.”
She hesitated, then tried to explain. “No. Flirt is what I built when I figured out who I really was. Separate from my marriage, or family, or what I believed I could be good at. And though I intend to fight, if I lose the store, I’ll still know who I am.”
Kane let out a long breath. His hands stroked back her hair with such gentleness, she ached to give in. Tell him she didn’t care—as long as she had him.
“Are you saying I don’t know who I am?”
“No. I’m simply asking you to make your own decision.”
“If I’m going to lose you, I’ll walk away from the deal.”
Those damn tears threatened again. She wrapped her fingers around his wrists and gripped him hard. Met his gaze head-on. “No, Kane. Because if you do, it’s the same thing as you taking Flirt away. I’ll be destroying a career you love. Which means we both need to make our own choices to move forward.”
The words came from gritted teeth. “This is a lose-lose situation. Is that what you’re telling me?”
“No. I simply can’t tell you what will happen this time. Will I forgive you? Will I understand? Can we move forward in time, accepting both of our decisions the way we need in a relationship? It’s a test—but it’s for both of us. Can you see that now?”
The realization seemed to hit him like a sucker punch. His arms dropped to his sides as he stared at her; confusion and pain and want morphing together at the same time. “I love you, Sierra. This isn’t a game to me. You’re everything.”
Her heart broke. And she knew if it was the truth, his decision would have been simple. This man owned demons that had made him who he was. He may not be ready to make such a sacrifice.
Could they survive together if he couldn’t? Did she love him enough to accept his limits and live with doubt? Wondering if there would always be another goal around the corner more important?
Sierra didn’t have the answers yet. “When will this all be official?”
Frustration simmered from his aura. “We sign the final contracts Friday.”
“Then I need to start making preparations. Tell Brooklyn and Prim. Contact my suppliers. I owe them the truth.”
“Let me help you, Sierra.” His plea was heartfelt. “I can help relocate Flirt and do anything you need. I can make this so much easier by using my resources for a smooth transition.”
“Do you really think that will make it all better?”
His jaw tightened. “Of course not. But you don’t have to handle this all by yourself.”
“I have no issues handling the business side of things. That’s not the type of need I have, Kane. I never did.” She turned away. “Let’s take some time and focus on our priorities. We can touch base later.”
“Why do you sound like you’re scheduling me into your calendar?”
Her voice turned cold. “Because I am. I can’t have you sleeping in my bed and be on opposite sides when I wake up. My brain will explode. Kudos to you for being an expert at this stuff.”
His rigidity broke and once again, Kane reached for her. “I’m sorry. I don’t think I’ve ever been this scared. Not in jail. Not when I had to protect Derek from my father. Not even when I showed up at Brick’s with nothing. Because if I lose you, I lose my very soul.”
She wanted to step away but her body automatically softened, welcoming his hands on her. Sierra half closed her eyes, allowing herself a few precious moments to forget. His warmth and strength seeped into her skin. She buried her face in his neck, savoring his spicy scent, wishing things were different.
“Sierra?”
“Yeah?”
“Did you ever see that movie You’ve Got Mail?”
Confused, she tilted her chin up and gave him a questioning look. “With Meg Ryan? Yeah. Why?”
