"Yeah, kinda is," Hawke agreed. "And girls usually don't change their mind, Rain. Still, I think you're ok. Aspen talks about you, and she said she's been trying to make sure she hasn't completely abandoned you. I think she means because she gave you some impressive plants."
"There's a new one in the bathroom today," I admitted.
"Lemme guess, tall and yellow?" Hawke asked.
I nodded.
"That's an Icebreaker."
I lifted both brows. "What?" Because I figured that since we were dating the ice had already been broken between us.
"The plant name," Keir explained, "although I've never seen one. I heard they can live without light for up to six months and nothing will kill them."
"And they're useful for making repellents," Hawke said. "The oil from them will sting and burn anything fae."
"Yep," Keir said, "I've got to see this thing. Gonna invite us over to see the rare plant, Rain?"
"Just you," Hawke told him. "I already had my girl time. She's also starting to sound like she at least knows a few math terms."
"Then let's do this," Keir said. "Rain, get your weapons."
Chapter Thirty
RAIN
When Keir and I made it back that night, there were three more plants in the bathroom. One was taking up the bathtub! Yeah, and it was half full of water, which made me think this one was the aquatic type.
Keir told me the names of them - which I promptly forgot. Considering he had to look them up in one of his textbooks, I didn't feel too bad about it. These were just plants. Sure, the fae kind, but I was more worried about what they meant than that they were here.
Because I did like plants. I loved the way they made our space feel like we'd claimed it. My concern was that Aspen wasn'there. I couldn't enjoy it with her, learn about her passion for gardening, or see if she needed help. I had to simply trust my friends.
Keir was sweet, though. He let me lie on his shoulder and rant about it. Well, there was more fretting than anything, but he said he understood. He also told me they were going to make sure Aspen knew I missed her.
That was when I realized I'd been a self-centered little twit. Keir was dealing with his own problems, but he hadn't complained once. Turning on my side, I shifted so I could see him and decided to stop ignoring it.
"Wanna talk about Fin yet?"
I felt him still beneath me. "Not really, no."
"Ok," I said, "but I will listen, you know. I just don't want to push andmake it worse. It's just that you're spending a lot of time with the court, so I thought you might be avoiding things."
"My room, yeah," he agreed. "It's weird, though. I mean, I don't miss the guy. Hell, if I'm honest, it's nice to not have him around, but that makes me feel like shit, so I try not to think about it."
"Kinda like my father," I said. "The DNA one, not my dads. He used to beat up my mom, and she shot him. Mom's in jail forever now, and I miss her, but at the same time, I barely remember her. My father? The few memories I have of him are all like some monster coming out of the dark. Granted, that was probably one of his drunken rages, but I start off glad he's gone, then I feel like I should feel bad because of it."
"Yeah?" he asked.
I nodded. "One of my many therapists said it's because I miss the chance, not the person. I was longing for a place to belong back then, right? So she said I wanted a family. I mean, she wasn't wrong, but her point was I wantedafather, notmyfather. I wanted to have the things everyone else gets, like daddy-daughter dances, or birthday cakes. Instead, I got bounced from home to home. So, like, I really just missed the thing I wished my father had been."
"Yeah," Keir breathed. "Rain, that actually helps."
Which sounded like he was still trying to cope with it. I understood, but now it made me worry about him too. Granted, I was starting to think all this worrying was going to give me an ulcer before I reached twenty. It also proved how amazing the teachers and staff at Silver Oaks really were. They had to know this shit was hard.
The next day proved it. In first period, which was now my "Magic with Ivy Rhodes" class, I asked about ways to use my shadows with the Hunt. That made Ms. Rhodes quiz me about what my shadows had done. The results weren't good, and I had no problem pointing it out.
So in third period - my other class taught by Ms. Rhodes - I was called to the front before the bell even rang. Wondering what I'd done wrong this time, I was braced for the worst.
"You need to see Liam in his office," she said, clasping my shoulder. "Everyone is fine. He just wants to check in with you, so you get an excused absence for this class, and Wilder will give you notes so you're not behind."
