Jack took off. I lunged, trying to stop him, but it was already too late. Left with nothing else, I rounded on her.
"What are you doing?!"
"I'm fixing this," she hissed, grabbing my shoulders and pushing me back so she could close the door again. "Because fuck you and your tantrums, Torian. Fuck you for thinking you're worthless. Well, you know what? You're not! You're the one with all the answers. You've been the one holding this shit together. In case you missed it, we need you."
"And I'll destroy it all!"
"So don't."
"But - "
She held up a hand, stopping my words. "Tor, listen to me. Do you think the rest of us aren't scared shitless sometimes? Do you not realize this is a huge fucking thing that's been dropped on us? Fuck, a year ago, I didn't even know fae were real. I thought I was hot shit because I wasn't like most foster kids who hoped to be a fairy princess. I was proud of the fact that I was a realist, willing to do the hard shit since the world sucks, and sure my best chance was to end up forgettable."
"You're the Morrigan," I reminded her.
She nodded slowly. "Yeah, and you're the Summer Prince."
"Not the same!"
Stepping closer, she lifted a hand to cup my cheek. "What happened, Tor? What set this off?"
"You don't want to know."
"I do," she breathed.
I leaned into her touch slightly. Just enough to feel the contact of her skin against my cheek. "Everyone else gets to be happy, Rain. Aspen got you. You got Keir. Hawke and Wilder just work. Everyone else can see their happy ending, but mine?" My guts clenched, and my eyes jumped to hers on their own. "I'm going to ruin it."
"No," she said softly.
"Listen to me," I begged. "I'm Aspen's younger brother."
"Three days," she scoffed.
"And still her closest relative. That makes me her heir. As long as I'm even in line for the crown, my mother's plan is still working. She killed our father, Rain! She has executed most of the Winter Court. There aren't nobles left to make a line of inheritance. It's us. Just us, and if the Queen dies, someone has to inherit the magic. It will pick someone if it has to. It will shift, working its way down, and if the only options are fae too weak to control it, no one knows what will happen - but me."
"What will happen?" she asked.
I licked my lips, wanting to pull away from her gentle touch, but also hating the idea. "Titania will crush them, destroy everyone with any tie to Winter at all, and consume the power herself. She will bastardize the natural forces of magic so that she, and she alone, will finally have it all." And I closed my eyes, relaxing into her hand even more. "And as long as I'm alive, her minions will try to kill my sister. I am nothing but a call to arms for them."
She pulled her hand away, forcing my eyes open. "You," she said, "are an idiot, Torian."
"What?!"
Rain gestured toward the atrium. "Out there are how many Summer students? A small percentage give a shit about who has the crowns. Most of them just want to understand where they fit in all of this. They dream of a world where they have the samechances as everyone else. They just want what they are to be ok. Not the bad guy, Torian, but ok."
"And?" I asked, not quite sure where she was going with this.
"And their queen is evil," she said. "The Mad Queen, right? Well, that doesn't sound like a side to be proud of. So should they hate themselves? Or maybe, just maybe, they love the idea of a royal who is willing to say fuck it. A prince who stands with everyone else. A guy so powerful it's terrifying, but who fights forthem."
"None of that changes that I don't fit," I growled.
Rain shrugged, not intimidated by me at all. "So?"
And I groaned, scrubbing at my eyes. How many times could I say this? How many different ways could I re-word it so she'd actually listen to me? What did I have to do to make her see how big of a problem my mere existence really was?
This time, I tried to do it calmly, hoping that would help. "Rain, as long as I'm in line for the throne, none of this can work."
She nodded just as my door clicked and slowly opened. Together, we turned as Aspen walked in, carrying Jack on her shoulder.
