I know I never told you about my boyfriend, but he’s the love of my life, and we’re meant to be together, now and forever. But I have two big problems. One is that he’s married. Please don’t judge. I had no idea when we got involved. I only knew that he was everything I ever wanted in a man and more. Being together makes me feel so alive. I know I should have broken things off when I found out about his wife, but how could I? I was already deeply in love. I can’t deny what’s in my heart.
He told me he’s going to get a divorce and that we’ll be married, only it’s not happening fast enough for this baby growing inside me. I can’t be an unwed mother. I can’t support a baby on my own, and Mom and Dad will probably disown me if they find out.
The other problem is, the man I love has become involved with the wrong crowd. He’s part of some gang in New York, and I think they work with the Mafia. He never talks about what he does for them, but I know it’s dangerous. He’s trying to get out. He’s a good man, really he is. It’s just hard to leave once you’re in over your head. But we’ll sort that out after we’re together, and we’ll start a whole new life as a family.
But I’m worried. If he won’t tell his wife about us, then I have to, because this baby is coming, and I need him to be with me. Who knows what threats she’ll make, and what information about his business and associates she might share to keep him from leaving?
I need to be careful, which is why I’m writing you this note. This is a risk I have to take. I’m not afraid of my boyfriend. I know he loves me. But his connections are another matter.If anything happens to me, I don’t want you taking any risks yourself.
Grace, you can’t tell Mom or Dad any of this. Not ever. It’s too dangerous for everyone. If someone comes after me, they could very well come after you. Just know I’m doing this for the baby and myself, and I love you very much.
Your devoted sister,
Anna
A heavy pall settles over the room, a silence born from sorrow and pain. I feel it deeply in the pit of my stomach, and it seems Taylor does as well—she’s on the verge of tears. Her arms are crossed over her chest, her face strained as though trying to contain her emotions. I’m not sure why the letter impacted her so profoundly, but I have no doubt that it has.
I can’t take Anna’s letter for myself. It’s an archive from Grace’s life, an artifact with her sister’s handwriting, something she would want to safeguard. But I ask if I can take a picture of it. I don’t know how I’ll use it, what significance it’ll have or how it might help my cause, but I know that my aunt read this letter—and soon after that, she vanished.
Grace gives her permission, but issues a warning. “You know what I’m worried about, don’t you?”
“You think my aunt Susie showed this letter to the wrong person, is that it?”
“Yes. And that maybe she was killed by the same person who took my sister. Killed because she learned the truth,” says Grace.
My head spins at the thought of Aunt Susie becoming embroiled with the Mob. For an aspiring podcaster about all things criminal, all that I know about organized crime is that it hasn’t gone away. Wherever there is an opportunity to make money, people band together to find ways to get it, legally or otherwise.
“I won’t put myself in any danger,” I assure her, though I’m thinking:Here I go with another piecrust promise.
Grace’s tone is parental. “Follow your heart, but, Izzy, please watch your back.”
I stand to go.
“I’ve got to get back to the kids,” I say. “Thank you for helping me with my ankle, and for everything else. I’m sorry again about taking the box. If I find out anything, anything at all, I promise I’ll let you know.”
Taylor seems out of it. There’s a faraway look in her eyes, a halo of sadness surrounding her. Grace is an empathetic, intuitive type, and I think she’s noticed, like I have, that Taylor’s gone pale.
“You look unwell. Perhaps you both need to go home and take a rest. It’s a lot to absorb. And thank you for being here, and for sharing,” Grace says. “Please, please, don’t be strangers. I’m making vegetable soup this evening for my nephew, Noah, who comes to check on me from time to time. We’d love to have you join us. Or come back another time. You’re always welcome.”
She pulls me into a warm embrace, but when Grace reaches for Taylor, her hug is barely reciprocated. Taylor is completely withdrawn, her mind elsewhere.
I can’t imagine what’s worrying her to this degree, but on our way out, as we walk along the well-worn path, Taylor pulls me to a stop. Her eyes are pleading, glazed with tears. She takes my hand, giving it a squeeze.
“Izzy, there’s something I need to tell you.” Her voice is a nervous whisper. “I could really use a friend right now. I guess the letter was a sign that I shouldn’t deal with this alone anymore.”
“Deal with what?” I ask.
“I’ve been keeping a secret. Something that changes everything.”
Chapter 37
Julia
Julia buzzed with a fresh surge of energy. Shutting David down had awakened a dormant part of herself. Her growing confidence felt addictive.
She would be okay regardless of how the situation unfolded. The loss of her business? Fine. Losing the lake house? Why would she want to live next door to that asshole anyway? So what if Taylor needed to go to public school? Julia went to one, and she turned out fine—a few minor hiccups aside.
The first step on her new journey was to embrace reality. She had stopped at a bookstore on her way back from Bennington. Chapter one in the book on mindfulness she had purchased suggested that in order to grow, she needed to accept her situation as it was, without attaching judgment to her story. And that meant taking full ownership of the role she played in the cratering of her life. She had joined Christian’s business willingly. She’d endorsed the private school they couldn’t afford, believing, as her husband did, that it would be in Taylor’s best interest. And she, nobody else, had agreed to give Christian signing authority over the family trust, which included the lake house. Julia had gotten herself into all these situations, and she intended to get herself out of them.
