He could’ve added that Rowan didn’t have to do that. But Rowanknew. He did it because he wanted to.
He did it because he loved Jordy’s kid and she loved him.
And so, said Jordy’s stupid heart, doing its best to crawl out his mouth, did Jordy.
Rowan set the books back into their hiding spot and wandered into the bathroom, listing slightly to one side.
Jordy watched him go, his heart still hammering, beating out a love-song tattoo even as his stomach sank with the knowledge that Rowan, though perfect in so many ways, was no one’s hockey spouse.
Well, fuck.
Second Period
NEW YORKCity had been just as terrible an idea as Rowan predicted. He’d done all the things he said he wouldn’t do and none of the things Taylor suggested. Rowan had not gotten over his infatuation, and to make matters worse, he’d spent an evening all but cuddled up with Jordy and a pair of newlyweds. As if Rowan needed a reminder of what he wanted and, for so many reasons, couldn’t have.
Not that Rowan wasn’t happy for Nico and Ryan. They were adorable together and surprisingly good company for a couple of sports bros—when they weren’t drunkenly staring into each other’s eyes. It was hard not to like Ryan, who’d shown up in a rainbow T-shirt with the caption “Rainbros” and then immediately gushed over Rowan’s, with its library cart and “They see me rollin’” slogan.
Still, as a means of getting over Jordy, New York City was a total failure from start to finish.
Fortunately Rowan had no time to dwell on that when they got back home. Between looking after Kaira full-time now that Jordy’s training schedule was filling up, and applying, waiting, and stressing out about his application to U of T, Rowan didn’t have the energy to worry about romance.
Jordy’s Monday started with morning practice and Rowan and Kaira planning their week. It was the last full week of summer vacation before Kaira started first grade, and Rowan suggested they make a list of everything Kaira wanted to do. Only a six-year-old could make a to-do list that ratedeatice creamandone more trip to the Science Centreof equal importance.
Rowan had been banned from including, or even telling, Kaira about the most exciting item on the to-do, which was a visit from her aunt. Emma was due to arrive on Friday and wanted to spend a night with Kaira in a hotel to kick off her visit, but given the patience of six-year-olds, Jordy wanted to keep it a secret until the day before Emma’s arrival.
So on Tuesday, Kaira and Rowan were at a playground to swing on the swings—item number five—when Rowan’s phone rang andUniversity of Torontopopped up on caller ID.
“I got an interview!” he blurted out the instant Jordy got home. Jordy froze in the entryway, the door half open and his hands stretched toward the hook to hang his keys. “Sorry,” Rowan babbled, “I didn’t mean to ambush you, but I was here and I have an interview tomorrow morning at the university.”
Jordy stepped into the house, closed the door, hung up his keys, dropped his bag, then finally turned to Rowan. He wore a bright smile, and he sounded sincere when he said, “Congratulations.”
“It’s just an interview.” Rowan didn’t want to get his hopes up. “They’re probably interviewing loads of people who are more qualified than me.”
Jordy stepped closer and forced Rowan to meet his eyes—Has Jordy been avoiding eye contact for the past few days?Rowan wondered distractedly, which was a dumb thought to have right at this moment—and said, “They’d be crazy not to hire you. Getting an interview is an achievement. Don’t sell yourself short.”
Rowan felt almost light-headed. “Right. It does mean that I’m suddenly busy tomorrow morning at ten.” Because Rowan shouldn’t lose sight of the important details.
Jordy shrugged. “No problem. I’ll text Adrianna. She should be able to watch her for the morning, and I can carpool with Sully.”
Then he moved toward the living room, away from Rowan. Which was a silly thought to have. He wasn’t moving away from Rowan, he was moving toward his daughter. Something he was definitely allowed to do and totally not out of character. And he wasn’t avoiding eye contact with Rowan either. Why would he be?
Rowan agonized over his clothes for a full hour before he got himself out the door to arrive at the university library at half nine. The front desk sent him up to the second floor for his interview, and Rowan took his time getting there. The less time he spent waiting in one place, the better.
The university had obviously spent money keeping the library up to date. There were so many places to sit and work—comfortable chairs and couches in the open for reading, desks and workspaces tucked in corners or behind doors for quieter study or research. Rowan could imagine booking one of the rooms to review with friends or complete a group project.
He wanted this so bad he ached with it.
At ten he met the chief librarian, Andreu Iulian, and his deputy chief, Marina Chifundo.
Marina, as the faculty liaison coordinator, would be his supervisor if Rowan got the job, and Rowan had no bloody clue if she liked him. He suspected she was nearing retirement age, not that you could tell based on her attitude toward the job, and had a no-nonsense air that suggested she’d seen and heard it all. Considering she was a Black woman in a position of authority at a university, Rowan suspected all of that was well earned.
Andreu might have been the one in charge, but it was clear he trusted Marina’s judgment and let her run the interview.
Half an hour later, Rowan stumbled out of the chief librarian’s office and found his way back into the sunshine. Marina had grilled him not only about his experience and expertise, but his hobbies and favorite films, all presumably to get a better sense of Rowan as a person, but the breadth and unpredictability of the topics left him feeling like he’d just left a police interrogation rather than a job interview.
Unbalanced, he decided to get some lunch before he picked up Kaira. Maybe the calories would settle his emotions before he had to worry about anyone else’s.
Fortunately, Kaira kept him busy for the rest of the day and all of Wednesday working through her list. Then on Thursday, after his morning workout, Jordy came home for lunch and told Kaira the news.
