“Ah!” She stumbles forward and Jasper catches her before she can fall. My chin hits my chest in an effort to hold in my laugh, and I can feel her eyes on me like a brand.
“Oh God, is everything okay?” Jasper asks, genuine concern in his voice at Rosie’s panting. I finally let up on the vibration, and I hear her breathing even out as I continue to look at my shoes. I know the second I make eye contact with her our secret will be up. I won’t be able to hide the way my eyes are going to devour her. In front of Halle and Jasper is no problem, but I know Rosie wants to keep the thing between us from Noah and Addison. As much as it stings, I’d never force her into a situation that makes her uncomfortable. So, if I’m going to hold on to our cover, I can’t make eye contact with her right now.
“I’m…fine. Just, you know…still taking it all in.” A breathy laugh escapes her chest and I manage to raise my eyes, lookingup at her through my lashes. Her eyes are already on me, though they don’t stay there long. The moment I lock onto those deep brown swirls of caramel and whiskey, she looks away, back to her friends, giving them placating smiles. She can’t hide her blush from me, though. An uncharacteristic heat that pinkens her cheeks; it’d be adorable if I didn’t know it was because she was horny and wet for me right now. The knowledge of that almost takes me out at the knees.
Despite the animalistic need I’m sure we’re both feeling right now, I think I’d almost trade it for just a little moment out in the open with her. To just kiss her right here, right now, congratulate her, and tell her how proud I am of her. I’m trying my hardest to soak up the heat in her eyes and the fun in our games, but something similar to the regular hollowness that feels like it’s glued to my soul starts to itch its way across my chest. I reach a hand to the spot, absently rubbing away the weird burning sensation.
“Are we kicking on?” Halle asks, grabbing her purse and pulling me from my thoughts.
“Oh, please tell me we are partying somewhere better than this snooze fest.” Jasper tsks and we all offer some sort of agreement.
“What about Bozz?—”
“Um, sorry for the intrusion. Ms. Garcia, there is a gentleman at the door asking for you?” One of the venue staff pops her head into our little circle, a gentle bow at her hips as she addresses Rosie, who looks confused at the girl before something passes over her eyes, something like recognition but also…no way, that isnotfear in the eyes of Rosie Garcia.
I straighten, barely able to think better of it before almost taking a step closer. But Rosie pushes through in the way she does best, squaring her shoulders and securing her mask.
“A gentleman?” she asks softly.
“Yes, said his name is Antonio and that you’d be expecting him.”
“Oh shit,” Addison whispers, my head snaps in her direction. Her eyes are wide green saucers, her mouth open in surprise.
Antonio?Who the fuck is Antonio?
Wait…
“Is that your dad?” Halle whispers and points in the direction of the door, and without a doubt, that is the billionaire property mogul Antonio Garcia standing at the entrance, looking every bit the terrifying hard-ass I’ve heard him to be.
I only glance at him a moment before looking to Rosie. She looks at me, for longer than she ever normally would with our friends around us, her swallow visible as she tries to clear her throat. Something in my chest cracks open at the utter exhaustion written deep in her eyes.
All this time, when I saw this look in her eyes, like she was carrying a weight over her shoulders, burdened by something I had always assumed was a result of her working herself to the bone, to the point of maybe not sleeping or eating properly…but with the way she anxiously avoids my stare and turns a resigned expression to the direction of her dad I realize, it wasn’t work,at all.
It was her dad.
“Uh, yeah. You guys go have fun. I forgot…there is somewhere I have to be.” She turns an apologetic smile to each of us. When her eyes get to me, she almost takes a step forward. I see her jaw tick, and I beg for her not to back down, but she does. She shakes her head and turns, heading for the entrance.
Leaving me standing here, without her.
Again.
CHAPTER 22
maybe i should give a few more fucks
Rosie
Dad is pissed.
Actually, no. Pissed isn’t the right word. Maybe, volcanic eruption, like mass destruction level raging. And how do I know this? He’s smiling at me.
I’m no fool—or perhaps I am, considering I ignored him—I know the smile is just a façade, a carefully constructed mask, similar to the ones I’m always wearing. His are for the paparazzi that have recognized him crashing the party and are snapping pictures. Anything to keep the general public from seeing what a tyrant he truly is.
When I’m standing in front of him, his smile hardens. Though the corners don’t drop, I can see the bulging veins in his neck and forehead from the sheer effort it takes for him to control it. But I refuse to let him see me sweat, refuse to show any fear or tremble. I simply square my shoulders and try my best to keep my chin high. I lower my eyes only because, to him, that is respect rather than a sign of weakness. And while I despise this man and definitely don’t respect him, there is aten-year-old inside me who desperately wishes he’d respect me back. That he’d tell me he was proud of me for the award and promotion.
Editor in chief.
All my dreams came true tonight. Everything I worked for over the last however long, and none of it matters in this moment. In his eyes, I’ve never mattered.
