Also he turned down a blonde who was hitting on him hard. The guys don’t know what to do with him.
I didn’t know what to do about the Caleb updates. Obviously, I don’t care that he is sleeping around. That’s what he’s meant to be doing. And the little, tiny, insignificant pinch at the bottomof my stomach at the thought of him entertaining some blonde, is jealousy thatI’mnot getting laid, not because he’s getting it elsewhere while I am suffering at the hands of mother nature.
It’s weird keeping this secret from my favorite people though, but when this whole friends-with-benefits situation eventually ends, I don’t want anyone to make it awkward. Casey and Addy will be so convinced that there are feelings between us because they can’t seem to separate sex and feelings like normal people. It will change the dynamic when we’re all hanging out together, and I don’t want that. I love our big group of friends. It’s rare to find this amount of people whose company you genuinely enjoy. Even if Jessie acts like he hates everyone, I know he is just a gentle giant under all that angst. He’d have to be, Casey is like the rainbow Care Bear—try not being gooey and happy around her; impossible. So, undecided on how to respond to the girls, I do the bad friend thing, I leave them each on read.
I’m also avoiding my parents, who have been blowing up my phone like it’s going out of fashion. But they are far too esteemed to send text messages; instead, they leave voice messages.
Stop avoiding your responsibilities, Rosita. Grow up, answer your phone.
Can you call your father, I’m sick of handling the mood swings that could stop if you just picked up your phone.
I just rolled my eyes and proceeded to “avoid my responsibilities” for the rest of the weekend. I am nothing if not consistent.
I also called in sick today; my work is still accessible from home, so I was doing a half-assed job of combing through the slush pile when I stumbled upon gold. Hence being on the phone to Jasper.
“Anyway, I’m going to flick you over a query, I think it’s epic but I’m hormonal and emotionally glitching, do you have time to read over it, tell me what you think?”
“Sure. But don’t cry to me when I steal your author.”
“You wouldn’t,” I say while gasping, biting down the smile from the rare bit of happiness I’ve had since Friday.
“Test me, bitch.” I just giggle while I type out the email to him.
“How’s Halle?” I ask, changing the subject. We are usually in sync with our cycles. I have what Jas dubbed the alpha cycle and Halle’s menstruals synced with mine and also came early.
“Cursing you and Satan like you’re the same person, but otherwise in good spirits. Daniel got another HR warning today, he came out of Chris’s office looking thoroughly chastised.”
“Dammit. I can’t believe I missed it. Steph again?”
“Yeah, poor girl. We’ll be hiring a new receptionist soon, I’m sure.”
“I hope she slams a stapler on his hand next time. That guy really doesn’t know when to stop.”
“He should be burned at the stake,” Halle calls from in the background.
“Offt.” She sounded like she was growling.
“Yep.”
“Okay, well, I’ll email this over, let me know what you think.”
“On it, boss.”
I hang up, clicking Send and about to press Play on the hundredth rerun ofThe Hillswhen my apartment door swings open.
“I know karate!” I squeal, jumping up so fast my heart is in my throat and I think the pressure sprained an ovary because there is a stinging pain in that region. “Mellow?” I ask, confused, looking at the soft and aged face of myniñera.Oh thank God.I absolutely do not know karate.
Carmela was my nanny growing up. She basically raised me and is like a third abuela. Definitely more of an abuela than my two actual blood-related ones. I call her Mellow because when Iwas a kid, I couldn’t quite get the pronunciation right and, well, it stuck.
“Mija.I brought you some soup. Your mother said you may not be feeling well, you don’t answer your phone?”
Those sadists. This is their idea of spying on me. Carmela was let go the moment I moved away to college and she was, for all intents and purposes, exiled from the family—of course, unless they needed something from her. She ended up finding a new family, whose children she cared for in the city, and I make an effort to see her every once in a while…I had been slacking, though. And my parents knew that if they mentioned me, Carmela would come running.
I release the breath I had held in when I was prepared to fight an intruder and stumble over to Carmela and her open and waiting embrace. I fall against her, letting her softness envelop me, hold me, and rock me. This is how I know everything is shit, because as a rule of thumb, I don’t cuddle. I don’t let myself be…held.
Cue full-body shiver.
I sigh like a content panda into her arms.
