Page 49 of Soulmateless
I should leave for Caelestia soon, before he catches on and has me strangled. It's only a matter of time before he catches on, and I miss my chance to find a kingdom that accepts me.
Chapter 18
Amias
It was difficult to make small talk after that car ride. Even while shopping, she kept her silence.
I've tried to strike up conversation again, mentioning the day before or asking her about things she likes, but she never followed up with an proper answer.
Eventually, evening comes, and I finish putting away groceries for her. "Okay… done!" I puff my chest at her newly filled and organized refrigerator.
I look at Clara who sits at the edge of her bed, wearing a weak smile. "Thanks."
My pride melts away. She's only been giving me one word answers. Her mind is still on what I said about dreamscreechers. She has such an empathy for those dreamscreechers that wouldn't be able to give it back to her. She doesn't even realize it.
I've been avoiding talking about it. Grandmother taught me not to listen to dreamscreecher fetishists and sympathizers. I shouldn't listen to their delusions.
But I stare at her, with her head drooping and her amber eyes blazing. She's pissed with me and I sense that she would incinerate me if she had the chance.
Guilt tightens my throat. How can I help this girl if she's still angry about what I’d said?
“You don't seem…enthused…” I murmur, folding my arms.
She shrugs, her expression unchanged. “I'm tired.”
I narrow my eyes. Her anger is more transparent than the cleanest glass window. “Is there… something you want to talk about?”
“No.” Her shoulders drop. “You've already done enough for me. I'd rather you go off and enjoy the rest of your day, so I can catch up on sleep.” She directs her stare towards the ground, avoiding eye contact. Such a small gesture, but yet such an obvious one.
Maybe the only way I can handle this is by giving her distance. “Are you sure?”
“Yes. Thanks…for the food.” Her smile remains small as she finally looks up at me. Those eyes, on the other hand, betray any guise of friendliness.
“Yeah. No problem.” Maybe it's better if it plays out this way. Like Grandmother says, I don't need delusions. It's better to cut off any conversation of dreamscreecher support and propaganda. Conversations poison the mind into thinking that those creatures are okay. You get lost and the actual truth becomes muddled.
I make my way towards the door to get my shoes on and be on my merry way, but I sense fire at the back of my head, burning like it's licking the nape of my neck.
I turn back and meet those ferocious eyes, paired with a subtle but visible scowl. Her glare doesn't move, almost as if challenging me. Daring me. Whatever she wants to say is burning enough inside her, and she's waiting for me to say something to release it.
Should I push back against her?
I turn away. No. Grandmother told me not to listen, and Clara told me to get out.
I take three steps forward before sensing the lick of blazing fire again, making the back of my neck tighten and putting pressure on the back of my skull. I can feel her stare, even if I'm not looking. I can almost hear her mocking me, all because I'm too much of a coward to challenge her.
But I'm not a coward. I'm just doing what's right.
But if I'm right, shouldn't an argument be an easy win? I can't lose when the truth is on my side.
But Grandmother… she said I'm an easy target for delusions.
But that suggests that I'm too naive and gullible to say anything. I want to prove her wrong.
Thoughts tug me between choices, before I finally face Clara again. I'm not gullible. I've been taught by Grandmother herself. Shouldn't she have more faith in me to handle these debates properly?
I can speak up without getting sucked into fantasies. “Are you gonna say what's on your mind?” I growl out the words. “Or are you gonna keep burning a hole through my skull?”
The fire in her eyes flickers. “What?”
