That was not true.
The four-armed alien was around. Maybe he’d help if I somehow made him understand. I thought of the winged alien outside. It would be a risk. A huge one. Perhaps the four-armed alien had thought Serlotminden was one of the creatures fromthe cliff, and he’d been trying to protect me. Of course, he could’ve been trying to steal me for his own reasons.
My eyes went to Serlotminden. I would have to leave him, but he’d die if I did nothing.
I pressed a hard kiss to his forehead, taking a deep inhale of his fresh scent, though it was tainted with the tang of blood. “You are not allowed to die. I love you, and you love me. You have to stick around and let me make you laugh. We have to grow old together. I don’t want any other future.”
I grabbed Pookie and planted her on top of his chest. “Protect him. Don’t move.”
She grunted, laying down.
With one last glance, I left the safety of the shuttle to brave two different aliens. I would not freeze, I would not stop, and I would not fail. Serlotminden was counting on me.
Chapter 34
Help.
He will not die. He will not die,I repeated the mantra, never stopping. The last time I heard his voice would not be my name on his lips. He would not die trying to save me. Serlotminden and I would become cranky old men together. I refused to accept any other possibility.
I dashed through the woods, searching for the four-armed alien. The winged-creature hadn’t been on the cliffs, from what I’d seen, and I hadn’t tarried to search for them. I screamed for the four-armed alien, even though he didn’t understand me. I hollered and shouted like the other animals living in the jungle weren’t a threat. I didn’t care. I needed help. Serlotminden needed help. If he didn’t survive… I refused to contemplate it.
The jungle was completely quiet except for my broken voice. The fronds on the trees moved of their own accord, curling and stretching at will. No birds sang. No bushes rustled. There was nothing. Absolutely nothing.
The four-armed alien was gone. Serlotminden had no one but me, and I was failing him even as I tried to save him. I turned in the direction of the shuttle and ran back, lungs heaving after a few seconds. I couldn’t leave him alone for long. He shouldn’t be alone when… My heart stuttered as a sob clogged my throat, making it hard to breathe.
Serlotminden was going to die. I was going to watch the light vanish from his green eyes and his chest stop moving, like all the others. But unlike the ghosts who were chains dragging me down, I knew Serlotminden. I loved him. And yet, just like those I had seen die, I’d failed to save him. I’d failed to help him. I was going to outlive him. I didn’t want to.
Blurry-eyed, I raced back. I needed to see Serlotminden. I needed to curl up against him. I needed to hold him.
Everything looked the same with the looming cliff and the monstrous nests, but it wasn’t. Dread filled every step I took. What if Mindy was already gone? Tears slipped down my cheeks, but I brusquely wiped them away and continued forward. He needed me, and I refused to abandon him.
The bay door creaked open, and my steps echoed loudly on the metal floors. My heart was in my throat and my fingers trembled as I opened the tent. Pookie snorted in welcome, still on top of Mindy, but I paid her no attention, solely focused on the love of my life buried in a mound of blankets. He was utterly motionless.
“Honey,” I whimpered, knees losing any power to hold me up. I crashed to the floor, sobbing. I crawled toward him. “Please, Mindy. No.”
I burrowed under the blankets to lay a hand on his scales and paused.
Serlotminden’s chest rose and fell, then rose and fell again.
Palpable relief rushed through me. I sagged, boneless. “Fuck.” I’d never been so scared in my life. I curled against his side, hand on his chest and watched it move with his shallow breathing.
“I love you,” I whispered. “I love you, Serlotminden. I don’t deserve you, but please, Honey, let me keep you. Don’t leave me. Stay right here with me, and I promise to make you happy, to make you feel loved, and to strive every day to deserve you.”
His chest continued to rise and fall, but he did not open his eyes.
The rest of the day and night passed with me watching Mindy breathe. Each one I feared would be his last, but it never was. His wounds still bled and he would not awaken. If he did not get help soon, he was going to die. There was no other outcome. This wasn’t something that he could recover from without assistance, which meant I had to go back out into the snow and brave the jungle once again.
Serlotminden needed help, and I had to find some.
When I was positive enough time had passed for the sun to have risen, I placed a kiss on his forehead and combed my fingers through his blood-stained hair. “I will be back, Honey, and you had better be here when I return.”
I set Pookie on him again, and she curled up without complaint, but her eyes were more watchful than usual, almost as if she was guarding him. I pressed a kiss to her snout, and she snorted.
Taking a deep breath, I set off again. This time I was more careful and looked around for threats as I called for help, but it didn’t matter. I saw nothing, not even the rock crabs next to the river. The jungle was utterly silent, yet I couldn’t give up. Stopping meant surrendering. Stopping meant Serlotminden was going to die. Stopping meant I’d failed again.
I refused to fail. I had to save one person. I refused to have Serlotminden’s ghost join all the others who haunted me.
A low roar broke the silence, and I whipped around, searching, but the dancing fronds didn’t allow much to be seen of the sky. At a run, I broke through the trees, and the ground rumbled, shaking and shuddering beneath me.
