“I would make you happy if I could,” I said with complete certainty. When I was alive, I hadn’t hadthatmuch experience, but I had enough to ensure Fyn enjoyed whatever we did.
“I’m already happy, my Caleb. I do not need more to enjoy being with you.”
I beamed, but at the same time, guilt poked at me. If Fyn was with a living, breathing person, he could’ve had so much more than what meager scraps I offered. All I had to give was my time. Nothing more. It wasn’t fair to my Sunshine. Not in the slightest. And yet I was selfish enough not to back away. Alive or dead, I’d never cared about someone as much as I cared about Fyn. Being with him consumed me, and I didn’t want to exist without him beside me.
“I’m excited for our date,” I said, changing the subject. “And I am excited for after.”
“After?”
I went up on my toes, so I was a hair away from his mouth. “I want to see you and touch you as much as I can. I want to watch you stroke your cock until you’re writhing with pleasure.”
His throat bobbed. “We need to have a conversation first, but I would like that.”
Permissions. The drakcol were very big on communication. Not a bad thing, but it did kill the spontaneous vibe. Whatever. I would give him whatever he needed so he felt comfortable and loved.
Chapter 25
A much-needed conversation.
The flight back to the palace was a blur. Serlotminden did keep the speed of his racing shuttle to a minimum for Kalvoxrencol, but, despite my brother’s reasonable fear, I wanted Serlotminden to hurry. I wanted to go home so Caleb and I could go on our date before enjoying what would come after. I forced my thoughts away from Caleb, for fear that my cock would stir once again. I was desperate, body and soul, for him.
When we docked, Kalvoxrencol bid us a quick goodbye, then he and Seth headed toward the palace, fingers interlaced. Seth appeared paler than normal, and he’d been quiet on the return trip home, not that I’d noticed at the time. Though the further heand Kalvoxrencol moved from us, the more at ease he appeared. Before they vanished from sight, Seth pulled Kalvoxrencol’s hand to his mouth and planted a chaste kiss on his knuckles.
Serlotminden started to fuss about his shuttle, wiping everything down and doing his post-flight checks while he cooed at the machine like it was an infant. When I took my leave, he didn’t even look up from the open panel.
Caleb bounced along as we headed inside. The sun was setting in the distance, setting the sky ablaze in a haze of gold and orange. It wouldn’t be long before the moons started to rise and stole the heat of the day. For a single beat of my soul, the light shone through Caleb, making him appear transparent. I stilled, but it happened so quickly that I doubted what I’d seen.
“What are we doing for our date?” Caleb asked, hopping around me, never staying still.
Planning our outing hadn’t been an easy affair. Caleb couldn’t do many things. I couldn’t take him flying, he couldn’t eat, and I wasn’t prepared to go to a play or wander the city with him at my side. I wouldn’t ignore him, but nor did I want people to witness me talking to nothing but air.
I wasn’t embarrassed by my mate nor would I deny my connection to this human soul, but Caleb didn’t need to witness how people reacted to my presence, whispering and calling me names. I didn’t want him to see any of that yet. In time, he would because it was impossible to hide it forever, but for now, I would cover all of the ugly parts of my life.
“You shall see.” I led him upstairs to the royal wing before continuing upward. We climbed the stairs to the tallest spire of the palace, and when we crested the top step, Caleb exclaimed. The spire was completely forged of glass and pierced the sky. Sheer curtains fluttered in the breeze from the surrounding windows. Potted trees with white flowers were perfectly placed between the windows, lending a floral fragrance to the air. In thecenter was a blanket surrounded by light stones that shone in soft colors ranging from pink to green to orange.
Caleb wandered around, mouth open wide. “Were you expecting us to have sex here?”
“N-no,” I replied, brow furrowed. I hadn’t planned that at all.
“Soft lighting and a blanket? On Earth that’s a (human word) for sex.”
“Koood?” I asked, trying to recreate the human word. I failed abysmally.
His lips pursed. “Signal, maybe, or sign?”
“Ah. I understand,” I replied. “I planned for stargazing. I’m not opposed to having sex with you here, my Caleb, but I would like to talk first.”
“Permissions?”
“Yes, but I would also like to know more about you, and there are things about myself I would like to discuss.”
Caleb skipped around the room, hovering near the windows. He was incapable of remaining still, and I didn’t mind in the slightest. I loved watching him. Every moment drew me in.
“What do you want to know?” he asked.
“Everything.”
“That might take time,” he said.
