Monty didn’t react.
“Sorry,” I muttered.
“You are allowed to mourn, Caleb. You died. You wandered. You lost Zoltilvoxfyn. And now you’re in a foreign body in a foreign world. Of course, you are experiencing some grief. It’s natural.”
Was that what I was doing? Grieving? I didn’t believe I’d even taken a moment after my death to be sad. I just moved forward (well, after a shit ton of anger). Now, all these years later, itrushed back to me. Rolling down the staircase. The sharp crack, then nothing. I’d hovered over my body as my brother screamed my name over and over again.
More tears slid down my cheeks as I sniffed.
Monty didn’t say anything as I wept and kept leading me to the massive cathedral before directing me inside. The Crystal thrummed with energy in the center. My lips curled in a silent snarl at the sight of it. That stupid fucking rock had thrown me into a body I didn’t know what to do with. It should have given Yolkeltod his body back. It should’ve saved him and not me.
I swallowed the sudden surge of emotion. I was alive; I was with Fyn, and I was so damn grateful. I couldn’t be happy, though, because that was so damn selfish. Tinlorray was suffering, Yolkeltod’s friends were pissed, and it was his body that I stole. How was any of this fair?
“Why?” I demanded.
“Why what, Caleb?”
“Why did the Crystal put me in this body? Why, Monty?”
He looked at the glowing rock that peacefully hummed. “I don’t know.”
“Aren’t you the purest spiritual soul? Shouldn’t you know?”
Monty glanced at me. “I don’t have all the answers. But I don’t think there is a reason why. Not one we would understand, anyway. It was Yolkeltod’s time, and it wasn’t yours. He is dead, and you are not. It simply is, Caleb.”
I stared at him, heavily reminded of the conversation I had with Yolkeltod before he passed on. There were no answers. I asked, “What now?”
“You learn to live.” He rested a hand on my sternum, making me wince. “This is your body. Your mind. Your soul. You must find a way to live with it.”
“Perhaps I can ask the Crystal, and it will tell me what to do.”
His tail flicked. “It spoke to you?”
“It asked me why I was trying to reaffirm what hadn’t been made yet.”
His mouth fell open. “The Crystal spoke to you?”
“Doesn’t it talk to everyone?”
“No,” he said. “Never. We spiritual souls have an understanding of it, but it doesn’t speak to us or anyone.”
My heart throbbed. “Why me?”
“I don’t know, Caleb. I shall have to ask Seth if the Crystal spoke to him as well. You humans might be more in tune with the Crystal than we drakcol.”
“Can I touch it again?” I asked.
“No,” Monty said, swiveling in front of me. “Tradition dictates that you cannot until you reaffirm your bond with Zoltilvoxfyn. The two of you haven’t even forged the genetic link yet. You will have to wait.”
Even though I could go my whole life without hearing that otherworldly voice again, I needed direction. Something. Anything.
“I imagine the Ranks will desire to speak with you more than they already do,” Monty continued.
Ireallydidn’t want to do that. Hopefully, Seth had also heard the Crystal so we could talk to them together if we had to at all. Kal was fairly vicious in his protection of Seth, and Fyn wasn’t far behind him regarding me.
My Fyn would keep me safe and away from anyone I didn’t want to speak to. Though we had just fought, and he might not be pleased with me at the moment. I couldn’t believe I’d run from him; I shouldn’t have, but… I couldn’t breathe.
Monty gestured to the door. “You should find Zoltilvoxfyn.”
