Page 73 of Say Yes to the Hot Mess
We’re not actually dating.
I pull away, gasping, my mind swimming with bits of contrasting information. We’re not actually dating, but that was a real kiss.
“D-Dex? Dexy?”
I look at Valencia, who’s arrived next to us. How long has she been there? She still looks as immaculate as she did earlier, not a hair out of place, but she’s got on a puppy dog face, her pale blue eyes wide as she looks atDexy.
“Yes, Val?” Dex says pleasantly. Though he’s not kissing me anymore, his arms are still holding me as close to him as I can possibly be, our bodies pressed flush.
“What—what was that?” She gestures to me. “With her? Your mother said the two of you weren’t serious—”
“Valencia.” I roll my eyes, annoyed that I even have to explain this to her. “It doesn’t matter what his mother says. If a man comes to a weddingwith a date, back off and leave him alone. That’s girl code. Everyone knows this. Don’t do sleazy things just to get a guy. Be better than that.” I look at Dex. “Are you interested in getting back together with her?”
“No,” he says, looking both surprised and amused.
I nod. “There you have it,” I say to Valencia. “Whatever his mother told you, he’s not available.”
Valencia offers the two of us one narrow-eyed glare before stomping off in the direction she came from.
And something odd but immensely satisfying happens somewhere deep in my bones: I feel…proudof myself. I feel strong.
“Look at you,” Dex says, a wide smile breaking over his face.
“Hold up,Dexy,” I say, rolling my eyes. “You can’t say ‘two birds with one stone’ and then kiss me. I am not a bird.”
Dex nods, and he’s smart enough to get rid of that smile. “I am aware that you’re not a bird,” he says solemnly.
“And you can’t just kiss me to get rid of your ex-girlfriend,” I say. “All new schemes must be run by me first.” I swallow, trying to figure out why I’m suddenly so irritated. And I think…I think it’s because for a second that kiss was real, and then I realized it was because Valencia was watching.
“To be fair,” Dex says gently, “I was going to kiss you whether Val showed up or not. I was trying to resist this evening, but…well.” He shrugs, rubbing the back of his neck. “Didn’t work so well.”
I soften a bit at this, though the look I give him is still suspicious. “Are you just saying that?”
“Nope,” he says, shaking his head and bringing his arm around my waist once more. “It’s definitely true.”
“Hmm,” I say. I look at him, considering. “I wasn’t aware fake boyfriends kissed their fake girlfriends.” But we’re still swaying to the music, still pressed together, still speaking in low, intimate tones. Right here, right now, this doesn’t feel fake.
“Ah,” Dex says. “Right.” He clears his throat, and when his eyes meet mine, I’m surprised to see his hesitance. “How would you feel about—about making this real? Just for now.” His voice softens. “Just while we’re on this dance floor.”
“Just for now?” say, looking up at him. I turn the idea over in my mind. “And then when we’re done dancing…what, everything is fake again?”
He nods slowly. “That’s what I’m proposing.”
I frown. “Why?”
He takes a deep breath, exhaling roughly. “Because I’d really like to tell you how beautiful you are without you thinking it’s fake. And I’d like to be able to hold you close and murmur sweet nothings in your ear.”
“I’d like that,” I say honestly, even as my pulse is trying to race faster. “A lot.”
“Good,” he says, his body relaxing slightly. “Good. Then let me tell you, real girlfriend, that I have enjoyed this weekend much,muchmore than I expected to.” He leans down, pressing his lips to my forehead. “You are kind”—kiss— “and intelligent”—kiss—“and optimistic”—kiss—“and beautiful.”
“And funny?” I add hopefully.
He smiles, laugh lines appearing around his eyes. “Hilarious.”
This is bizarre, what we’re doing. Bizarre that we’re making this real for all of ten minutes. Bizarre that it feels soright.But bizarre, too, that we think we can just switch things on and off.
I don’t stop it. I just lean into him, letting my head rest on his shoulder, and continue to sway with the music. “You’re not as bad as I thought,” I whisper. “And you’re a really good kisser.”
