Page 163 of The Outsider
“Mind if I join?”
I shook my head and moved over so she could sit next to me. She took the bottle from me and took a swig of her own. Neither of us talked for a while.
“We’ll find her,” Kimmy finally said. “No matter what it takes.”
“I know.”
“It doesn’t matter what they said at the council meeting, you know. Nearly three years ago, we left on our own and look what we accomplished. We can do it again.”
I grunted and took another drink. I’d called an emergency council meeting when I got back. It hadn’t gone well.
Even after everything I’d done—after everything Claire had done—nobody wanted to go with me to find her. Except Danny, but he was still in no shape to go anywhere. As soon as I told them that a compound was involved, everyone cowered. They were scared—for themselves and their families.
Some part of me totally understood. If someone had asked me to leave Claire behind and go on what might be a wild goose chase, I’d hesitate, too. But another part of me was angry. Angry because I’d risked everything—everything—for this place and its people, and when push came to shove, most of them wouldn’t do the same for me when I needed it most.
Kimmy, of course, stuck by me the way she always did. She’d been the only person who always had my back…until I met Claire.
Oh, they’d all promised supplies. Food, clothing, ammunition, and survival gear had started arriving at the house as soon as the meeting ended. The Armstrongs, McNeils, and Hardings had promised to look after Summerhurst again while we were gone, which was no smallamount of work, especially with the farm now running. I’d dropped Poppy off at the McNeils’, who’d be caring for her while we were gone.
I sighed.They’re supportive in the ways they can be, I guess.
“Last time,” I said, “we weren’t up against a fortified giant with way more resources and technology than us. Even I have to admit…it doesn’t look good for us, Kim.”
I took yet another drink. “But I have to try.”
Kimmy squeezed my hand. “Of course you do—wedo. We love her.”
Her voice shook, and I squeezed my eyes shut.
“She did it to protect me,” I croaked. “That’s why she got taken. Every time I think about that, I feel sick. I failed her.”
“Do you think you could’ve taken all of them on by yourself?”
I blew out a breath. “No.”
Kimmy smiled sadly. “Then I think Claire was just doing what you would’ve done for her.”
My chest ached, but I couldn’t let the pain in. If I did, I’d be useless.
“Are you ready?” she asked after a moment.
“Yeah,” I replied. “Everything’s packed.”
“Me too,” she said. “First light, we can leave. But we both need sleep.”
I snorted. “Good luck. What do you think I’ve been trying to do for the last hour?”
She squeezed my hand again. “I’ll be right back, okay?”
I nodded. She disappeared for a few minutes, then came back with our sleeping bags in her arms. She spread them out next to each other on the floor by mine and Claire’s bed.
“Let’s try this,” Kimmy said softly. “So you can feel close to her…but you don’t have to sleep in the bed.”
I swallowed hard. It was a rare gift to have two people in my life who always seemed to know what I needed.
I got into my sleeping bag, and Kimmy turned out the lamp before doing the same.
“Thank you,” I whispered into the darkness.
