“Dakota Meyer . . . she’s a real smitten kitten for the golden retriever of the group.”
“Dream on, Golden Boy.”
“I didn’t even have to dream last night with you in my arms. Best night of sleep I’ve ever had.”
It was for me too. But I’m not about to fan the sparks of hope in his eyes. Grabbing my plate, I head up the steps to add some much-needed space between the two of us.
No matter how attractive he is. No matter how easy it is to flirt and banter with him. No matter how nice it is tofeelagain. We wouldn’t work. I’m far too broken, and I refuse to tarnish his shine.
17
May
“You fucking sliced it, Carsey!” Jax hollers.
“Shut the hell up,” Bennett whisper-shouts.
“What’s gotten into you today? You’re typically my scratch partner, but even G is showing you up today.” Jax scowls at me while flipping his brother the bird.
My golf game has gone to shit today. I wasn’t lying when I told Dakota I’d rather go to the spa with them than golf. It doesn’t help that I tried to shoot my shot by asking her out just in time for Jax to interrupt us. I really thought we were getting somewhere, but I should’ve known she wasn’t ready yet.
“Maybe I’m trying to let the man of the hour win, considering it’s his last hoorah,” I quip, shrugging my shoulders.
Jax shakes his head. “I call bullshit. The two of you are almost as competitive with each other as me and Benny. No, that’s not it. . .” He trails off before snapping his fingers at me. “Ah, I know. It’s the fucking nanny, isn’t it?”
Turning my back to him to avoid eye contact, I try to focus on Griff teeing up his ball on the last hole. Unfortunately, Jax is like a dog with a bone now that he thinks he knows what’s eating at me.
“Jax,” I warn.
“Don’t give me that shit. I can tell you’re into her. So what’s holding you back?”
“Well, for starters, when I asked her to go out with me this morning, you chose the perfect time to interrupt our moment by shoving an entire piece of bacon in your mouth,” I bite out, my frustration for playing poorly and being interrupted earlier is bleeding through my tone.
“Ah, fuck. I’m sorry, Carse. I didn’t realize.” Jax lifts his hat and scratches his forehead before smoothing it back on his head. “So, I take it she didn’t give you an answer?”
“You think? What gave you that impression?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Probably the case of blue balls and the giant stick you’ve got up your ass.”
“And tell me, Jaxy, how has the giant case of blue balls been working for you over the last two and a half years?”
“Great deflection,” he scoffs. “But I’m not falling into that trap. So what’s the deal with the two of you? You’ve been pretty tight-lipped, but from what I’ve gathered, Dakota moved in with you after New Year’s Eve when Benny brought the two of you to the hospital. Is she divorced now?”
“Yeah, for about a month now. My dad was her attorney. I wanted to give her space to heal, and I’ve been working on myself too. But with the two of us living together, we’ve grown really close. Have you ever met someone and just knew the moment you laid eyes on them that they were meant to be in your life? I’ve been gone for her since the day I met her.”
Jax looks at me incredulously. “I have—you know I had that with Tae—but I never thought I’d see the day where playboy Carse settled down.”
“Who are you calling a playboy? You’re the one with the party boy, womanizer reputation, not me.”
And he is. Ever since Jax and his high school sweetheart, Tae, broke up the week he had to leave for Harvard, he has made it his mission for everyone to see him as this party-hard fuck boy. Those of us that are close to him know the truth. He throws these over-the-top parties just hoping they’ll go viral and it’ll get back to his ex, who is currently on tour for her debut album opening for one of the most recognizable male country artists. I also happen to know that even though Jax is photographed flirting, dancing, and kissing women nonstop, he has an even bigger case of blue balls than I do. From what he told me when we got drunk on my twenty-first birthday, he hasn’t been able to move on even after almost three years. Not just emotionally, but physically too.
“Guess we’re just a bunch of lovestruck fools lusting after women who don’t return our feelings,” he murmurs as he punches his foot down on the gas pedal of the golf cart.
Jax thankfully drops the subject of my current predicament for the rest of the afternoon. We’re grabbing a drink in the clubhouse after our round when Bennett takes a seat next to me at the bar. Griff and Jax went to look at the golf apparel in the store downstairs, so it’s just the two of us.
“How’s it going, Cap?” I ask him, knowing he hates being called that.
“You’re such a little shit sometimes,Rookie.”
