Page 41 of What It Should Be
“Tell me, what is your go-to karaoke song?” McKenna asks me as she curls her blonde, waist-length locks into the most stunning waves.
“Probably ‘Wide Open Spaces’ by The Chicks,” I decide.
“The Chicks!” she exclaims. “Oh my gosh, I love them so much. We grew up listening to them every summer at our cabin with our mom.”
“My mama used to play the best 90s country music in our house when I was growing up. The Chicks, Shania, Martina, Garth, Trisha, Faith and Tim. We’d clean the house, and she’d damn near blast the speakers on our stereo while we were doing chores.” My chest squeezes with the same ache I get any time I think of home and my mama. Now that Aaron and I are officially divorced, I question why exactly I haven’t moved back to Texas yet. Something keeps a hold of me here. Perhaps not something, but a few someones.
Kenna sets down her curling iron, walks over to me, and gives me a big hug. “I feel like we’re celebrating so much more than just my engagement tonight,” she says as she steps back. “We’re celebrating your freedom as a newly single woman. And we’re definitely celebrating the fact that you decided you’re going to write a fricken book.”
“McKenna!” I squeal, looking around the room to make sure no one else overheard. “I told you that in confidence. No one else on this earth knows I’m an aspiring author.”
“I’m not sure why. It’s completely badass. I can’t wait to read it!”
“Look, I know how much you and I love to read. But the only reason I told you that was to make sure you were okay with me typing away on my computer while Cadence is napping or sleeping. I’m not ready for anyone else to know just yet.”
“What about my brother?” she asks.
“What about your brother?” I mimic her question as I apply a coat of mascara to my lashes.
“Well, there’s the fact that the two of you live together. He will most likely see you working your fingers to the bone as you write your book. And then there’s also the fact that I thought the two of you were getting close.” At that, I whip my head around to look at her. She has her arms crossed and a knowing smirk on her face.
Shit. Am I really that obvious?
“Define close,” I say nonchalantly.
“Perhaps closer than you’re ready to admit to me right now. Close enough that I noticed he has leaned on you more than me lately.” She pauses before adding, “Look, Dakota, I don’t know exactly what is happening between you and Carse, but I do know my brother. I’ve never seen him so enamored with a woman as he has been with you since meeting you at your interview. I also know my brother is a sweetheart with a heart the size of your home state. So, please, just make sure you’re ready for whatever is happening between the two of you. I don’t think I could take seeing Carson heartbroken.”
It takes everything in me not to sayagain. This man has been heartbroken since the day of McKenna and Katie’s accident, though he’s never admitted that to me. And the accident with Cadence likely deepened the break.
Feeling slightly uncomfortable discussing my feelings for Carson with his sister when I don’t even know how I truly feel, I tell her, “I care deeply for Carson. We became closer friends quickly after I moved in with him. He is someone I feel like I can open up to and be vulnerable with. I’ll probably tell him about my book soon. But as far as a relationship goes, I just feel like he and I are too different, not to mention the age gap between us.”
“I don’t think you’re that different from one another. You both sound ambitious in your pursuit of what makes you happy. His passion is hockey. Yours is writing. And you both are terrible singers, which we’re about to see on full display tonight,” she teases. “I’ll leave it alone until you’re ready to talk about it. But, please, don’t let the stigma of an age gap keep you from happiness. I know I’m biased, but my twin is a pretty fucking great guy.”
I smile at that because Carson Wilder is the best of the best. But as much as it pains me to say it, I just don’t think he and I would work. The last thing any golden boy needs is a tarnished divorcée cougar.
Carson
We’re at one of my favorite bars of all time, The Watering Hole. It’s a hole-in-the-wall place on Lake Mille Lacs—the same lake my family’s cabin is on, and also Griff and Mack’s new cabin next door.
We decided to throw their joint bachelor and bachelorette parties up here between the two houses. It’s Memorial Day weekend, so it’s pretty packed on the lake, but it also means The Watering Hole is having its annual karaoke contest. This weekend came together a little last minute since we weren’t sure if we’d still be in the playoffs or not. Unfortunately, we lost out in four games to Colorado.
Tonight is the first of the three-night celebration. Jackson, being the party planner he is, helped me plan the ultimate weekend for Mack and Griff. Each night has a theme. Tonight is reverse cowgirl—Jax’s idea, not mine—where everyone dresses up as cowboys and cowgirls. Night two is golf pros and tennis hoes—again, Jax’s idea—where the guys stay dressed in their golf attire, and the girls dress up in tennis skirts. Night three is the blackout, where everyone dresses in black except for the future Mr. and Mrs., who will be in white.
The ladies were finishing up a drinking game at the cabin, so they told us guys to go ahead and get a few tables for the group. Following the theme of the night, we’re all dressed in cowboy hats, boots, and a variety of outfits. Griff went full-blown Garth on us with his black cowboy hat, black cowboy boots, black button-up, and dark jeans. Jax is feeling right at home with tonight’s theme, as he typically dresses in a midwest country boy wardrobe. He’s got on a camo button-up with his light brown cowboy hat. I opted for a tan cowboy hat with the tightest bootcut light-wash jeans I could find, an obnoxiously big belt buckle that says “Ladies, my eyes are up here,” a plain white T-shirt, and cowboy boots that Dakota helped me pick out.
Then we’ve got Bennett, the serious and stoic captain of the team, who also happened to be the loser of our fantasy football league this year and who is long overdue for his punishment. Because of this, we decided that we’d each get to pick out his outfits for the weekend. Tonight’s outfit is brought to you by Jax—Bennett has a straw cowboy hat, a cutoff flannel shirt that also looks like it may be a cropped top, and a pair of cutoff jean shorts that are practically glued to his thick hockey thighs and show off his crocodile cowboy boots. I just about spit my beer out when I saw him walk down the steps at the cabin. Needing the liquid courage to get through the night in the ridiculous outfit his little brother picked out for him, Bennett pre-gamed heavily back at the cabin and is now owning the outfit. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen him tipsy.
We’ve just ordered a round of whiskey for the guys when the bar’s emcee for the night announces they’ll be starting karaoke soon.
“Will you be singing ‘Should’ve Been a Cowboy’ tonight?” Griff asks me. When I send him a questioning look, he breaks out in a fit of laughter. “You know, because you’ve got heart eyes for the nanny from Texas.”
Before I can attempt to deny it, a roar of catcalls and wolf whistles break out over the bar as a group of women enter the front door. I see Mack dressed in a white minidress with coordinating white cowgirl boots and a matching white cowgirl hat with a short veil spilling out the back. She’s got a white sash that says bride-to-be on it and a blinding smile that lights up her face. She looks so fucking happy, and I love that for her.
Behind her are her teammates, Brooke and Alexa, but I don’t immediately see Dakota. That is, until it feels like the world stands still, and the door opens in slow motion as my Texan dream girl walks in.
I hear a low whistle beside me as Jax says, “Well, well, well. It turns out the nanny-turned-roommate didn’t fuck around with tonight’s theme.”
He’s not lying. She’s wearing a jean miniskirt that should be illegal with how sexy it makes her legs look, a cropped hot pink shirt that says “Kenna’s last hoe down” showing off the most delicious peek of her tanned and toned stomach, a black cowgirl hat, and knee-high rhinestone cowgirl boots.
