“I won’t die.”
He looked brave and confident, but she knew Big Buddha would kill him. Because of her. “I have to stay away from you and keep you safe from Big Buddha.”
Robbie shook his head and started to protest, but she cut him off.
“Even if Big Buddha somehow didn’t kill you, you’ll keep working for Aiden Porter, leaving me behind and most likely dying in some drug battle.” Alice stared at him, daring him to disagree. Daring him to say he’d move to Atlanta. That he would find a nice job as a security officer at the mall and find a way to show her mother he was the perfect man for her.
“Working for Aiden is what I do,” he said simply.
Alice nodded. She didn’t really want him in a safe, easy job that wouldn’t fit his take-charge, kick-butt personality and skill set. But all his reassurances that he didn’t want a beard or a job to come between them were hard to believe. She didn’t want to change him or ruin his life’s work, but she did want him alive.
“Can we work through your fears of me dying?” he asked.
“I don’t know how,” she said miserably. She should’ve just held him close, but she kept going. “There are other reasons we’ll never work. We don’t even live in the same state anymore.”
“And your mom hates me?”
“It’s on the list.”
Robbie drew in a breath then pushed it out. His blue eyes were intense. She thought he’d push her harder, but he released her and stood. “You’re all right then?”
“Yes, thank you.”
“Goodnight.” He turned and walked out the door, shutting it behind him.
Alice was left alone, without his strong arms around her.
It was for the best. Robbie would live. Not being together was devastating, but the tragedy of him dying would be far harder to face.
The next morning, Alice felt groggy as she awoke. Instantly the fear returned—bullets whizzing, Robbie almost being hit, running for their lives.
She prayed and prayed, but nothing settled her.
After a quiet breakfast, they had to go give statements at the police station. The police would only tell Robbie that both attackers were professional hit men. It was horrifying, but Robbie had Aiden’s people check and the hit on the dark web was now gone. Aiden’s guy, Ollie, apologized for not seeing the hit earlier. It hadn’t been on his radar.
Would Big Buddha stick with his mode of operation and take another hit out on Juneteenth or the Fourth of July, or would he try to kill Robbie in a different way? Would he change his plan and come after Robbie every day of the week? Who was Big Buddha? Had her friends, boyfriend, and dog been killed by hired hit men or by Big Buddha himself? Maybe the murderer realized he needed professional help to kill someone as tough as Robbie.
After the police station, they ate lunch in a quiet restaurant and then went to a late afternoon Sunday service. Everyone was quiet as they returned to the condo. Alice went to her room and lay down, but she couldn’t settle enough to take a nap. Dinner was solemn, and they ate inside, not on the patio. Robbie kept giving her searching looks, but he didn’t say much.
Finally, after dinner, he asked, “Are you going to stay?”
“What difference does it make?” she asked, drained from the long night and all the stress.
“I could never complain about more time with you,” he said softly.
“To what end, Robbie? It’s blaringly obvious that we’ll never be together.” It was even harder to say the words after that off-the-charts kiss last night. Alice longed for him, and she would love for him to tell her he’d move heaven and earth to be together.
He shrugged. Obviously he had no solutions either, but his blue eyes said he wouldn’t stop trying.
Alice stood from the table. “I’m sorry our situation can’t be different.”
Robbie said nothing, but as she turned to walk away, he caught her around the waist and plucked her off her feet and onto his lap.
“Robbie,” she breathed out.
He bent and captured her mouth with his. Their lips moved hungrily together, longing for the peace and committed relationship they could never have. Instantly she was transported to a world of peace and happiness that she hadn’t felt since the murders started a year ago, truly since Robbie had walked away fifteen years ago. Horrifically, she knew it couldn’t last. She broke away, out of breath and wishing for more. The only time she felt no fear of him dying was during their kisses.
“I’m sorry as well,” he murmured.
