“What the fuck?Seriously?”Dylan shouts, plowing his way into the living room where I’m currently sprawled out on his couch, trying to drown out the sound of my incessantly ringing phone.“At least turn the damn ringer off if you’re not going to answer it,” Dylan barks, rifling through my purse and switching it off for me.
“And yes, seriously,” I reply to the first part of his question.“He’s probably coming over here right now, but don’t you dare let him.”My words come out as a warning to Dylan to not even think about betraying his sister for his work acquaintance.
“I’ll tell him you’re not here,” Dylan immediately answers, again looking through my purse for my car keys.“I’ll move your car to the back.”
But just as he begins to leave, Tessa rests a hand on his shoulder.“Think about how you felt when I was trying to hide from you,” she says, her words quiet and sweet.I know she means well, but I’m not up for being thrown to the wolves just yet.
Dylan turns to look at her, swallowing hard and the flash of a memory crosses his face.It’s a mix of fear and worry, and I’m sure he’s thinking about when Tessa not only tried to ghost him after their hook ups, but also when she found out she was pregnant.
There’s no way he wouldn’t have wanted to know about his future kid, but this situation with Leo is different.We don’t have that connection to tie us together like Dylan and Tessa do.We’re just two people who fell in love only to find out that starting a relationship based on a lie by omission wasn’t the best idea.Now I feel like a fool for leaving it off my resume and for not telling Leo.But hindsight is twenty-twenty, and I can’t change it.I have to live with my decision not to and I have tolive with the way I behaved when I quit.
“Han, I know you don’t want to talk to him, but if he loves you, which we all know he does, you need to figure out how to move past this,” Dylan says, his voice comforting, but I find no comfort in it.
“Dylan, I flipped his dad off with both hands!”I wail, my face growing hot when I think about it.“I told him I never wanted to see his stupid fucking face again and fuck me if the universe doesn’t hate me because I totally saw it again.I saw it at my boyfriend’s house, and it was his dad’s face!”I’m yelling and crying and carrying on.I can literally see no way out of this other than quitting my job and never speaking to Leo again.Problem solved.
“Maybe now’s a good time to talk to Leo about how different it is working at Somerville’s than it was at The Yellow Door.Maybe he has no idea that his dad is a dick?”
“I’m not going to be the one to tell him that!”
“You need to talk to him, Hannah,” Dylan presses and while he’s right, it’s not happening tonight.I’m totally irrational and there’s no way I can say anything without sobbing uncontrollably.Poor choices coming back to bite me in the ass.
“Yeah, not tonight,” I say, drawing the line and holding up my hand to get him to stop talking.“I’m going to take a bath in your huge bathtub and then I’m going to cry myself to sleep in your extra bedroom.I’ll reassess this mess in the morning.”
“There’s nothing stopping him from showing up here, Han,” Dylan now says, and I realize he’s not on my side anymore.Fucking falling in love has made my brother soft.
“You are,” I bite back, glaring at him as I grab my purse and storm toward his guest bedroom.
“He’s calling me!”Dylan shouts, and I feel like I’m going to puke.“I’m not going to ignore him.”
“Fine, do whatever you want, you traitor!”I cry, slamming the bedroom door.I flop down on the bed, my head a huge fucked up mess.
Not only did I lose the first guy I’ve ever fallen in love with, but I’m also about to lose my job.Lauren and Jack’s loyalty is to Leo since he’s their head chef.Wait…I’m their head chef too, but Leo’s been there longer and they don’t want all this relationship drama on their hands.Especially after just having their babies.
I’m supposed to work tomorrow, but there is not a chance I’m showing up there.The last thing Leo and I need is to have this conversation at work in front of all these people who we just confessed to that we’re together.That weweretogether, because we certainly aren’t now.
I start the bath, letting the hot water fill the tub and warm the air before stripping off my clothes.I climb in, hoping this somehow makes me forget what happened.If I were lucky, this would all be a bad dream.
My phone chimes out with a text, and being the glutton for punishment that I am, I can’t keep myself from checking it.Luckily it isn’t Leo, but it’s not much better.It’s Dylan and his guy code or whatever the hell it is that is making him take Leo’s side in this.
Dylan: I told him not to come here.
Me: Thank you
Dylan: Tomorrow is a new day, Han.Talk to him.Think about how he’s feeling.
Me: What about how I’m feeling?
Dylan: I know you’re a mess, but Leo probably is too.
Me: A mess with realizing that his girlfriend hates his dad.
Dylan: I’m going to let you wallow and ignore that you’re being a whiny pain in the ass.
I text him a middle finger back, letting him know that while I appreciate his words, I’d rather not hear them right now.I also need to do something about work tomorrow.I can’t bring myself to go in and face Leo.So instead of calling Leo, who I would normally report my absence to, I text Ellen, letting her know that I need to take tomorrow off.
She doesn’t ask any questions and all I can hope is that she can see past this mess should she find out.I need to keep my job.But as much as I’m worried about my job, I’m more worried about my relationship with Leo.It’s hard to picture my life without him now.
I toss my phone onto the towel I have crumpled up on the floor and I sink down into the water.I fucked up the best thing that has ever happened to me all because I had to get the last word in with a person who meant nothing to me.Now these two worlds have collided and I can’t even begin to imagine how I can fix this.
