“Urg,” Danny groaned. “Jerk.”
“You’re the one on top, Sparky. Just being lazy.”
“Mmm…yep,” Danny said and dipped down to kiss Mal again before making an exaggerated pained expression and reaching over to grab his shirt. He tied off the condom and disposed of it in a small wastebasket next to the mattress, then used his T-shirt to wipe them clean, slower than usual, clearly sleepy, and probably still on the mend no matter how much he denied it.
There was a bag on the right side of the bed he began to dig through until he made a noise of satisfaction, situating next to Mal in a cross-legged position, and tore the wrapper from an energy bar. Like many times before, Mal was left tingling and sprawled out in the aftermath while Danny chomped on a snack. And damn if the whole display didn’t make him love the kid more.
Catching Mal staring, Danny tilted the half-eaten protein bar toward him.
“I’m good, thanks.”
“I’d much rather have leftover bulgogi,” Danny said. “Or Thai food. Or your French toast!” His stomach gave a weak gurgle at the thought as he finished the protein bar.
“That gonna be enough for you?” Mal asked.
“I’ll survive. Ate a lot at dinner. I’d rather enjoy the moment.” Licking his lips of remaining crumbs, he smiled all too charmingly andsnuggled in beside Mal, pulling the covers over them. Just as well; Mal wasn’t sure he could move more than allowing Danny to wrap him up in long, spindly arms.
No one held Malcolm Cho. No one snuggled him and smiled and cared. It filled his heart to bursting how easily Danny fell into the role and made him want to be everything the other man needed—even though he knew now that them against the world wasn’t how it had to be.
He kissed Danny chaste and gentle on the lips. Still, tired as he was, tired as Danny looked, it wasn’t time to fall asleep yet.
“Tell me,” Mal said, hooking his thumb around Danny’s jaw.
“Tell you what?”
“Everything. I want to know how bad it got, how bad it was…that you had a bottle of pills,” Danny flinched at the mention, “and need to be reminded of what a miracle you are with pixels,” then smiled when Mal stroked his thumb along Danny’s cheekbone.
“It’s kind of a long story.”
“You wanna start like David Copperfield, you can.”
Danny chuckled. “We don’t need ‘I am born’. It started when Mom—no, when Rick…” he trailed, eyes going distant.
“Tell me.”
So Danny did. He told Mal about meeting his partner, how it was the first time he’d felt like he fit somewhere, having always been the weird kid at school, rambling about conspiracies and the impossible until only Stella and his parents and a few patient teachers still looked at him like he was normal.
He never had many friends. He could be as personable and cheery as you like, get people to warm to him easily, but sometimes things got dark, and not everyone could handle that. Stella could, but with Rick…
“Were you in love with him?”
“What?” Danny turned wide eyes on Mal. “It wasn’t like that. Things were just different with him than with Stella. Maybe coz we’re both men? But no, it’s different with Andre too. Stella’s more my sister than my friend. And Andre and I have different things in common. Same with Lynn. But with Rick, we just…got each other. You know?”
“I do. Dom and I are at odds plenty, but we’re like that too. Have been for over twenty years. Course there was a time when we gave being more a shot.”
“Really?”
“Went up in smoke. Or maybe steam...” Mal snickered when Danny shook his head at him. “Didn’t get past a first kiss, Sparky, relax. We aren’t each other’s type. Just needed to test that back when we were kids. But as a friend, at times she’s meant more to me than anyone.”
“Exactly,” Danny said. “I’d never lost anyone until Rick. Then to lose Mom so soon after…”
He told Mal about Thanatos again. About losing his composure, his control. About months of blaming himselfandblaming Mal. About how low he had been when he faced Camouflage and how appealing the thought of hurting someone had seemed back then.
The worst and yet maybe most important part was hearing Danny’s plan to ruin Mal, finally hearing it from start to finish; all Danny’s cruelties and twisted strategies, but how the real Mal he got to know chipped away at everything he thought he wanted until he found something so much better than revenge.
“I kept telling myself you were conningme, that it was justified, that you deserved it, but even when I was lying to myself, there were times when I…forgot. That night, when I scared you with the invisible suit…” He clenched his eyes shut. “That damn suit, I…I just wanted to make you feel safe again. I wasn’t thinking about leaving someday and tearing your heart out. I wanted to show you how amazing you are, how beautiful your scars can be…” Peeking his eyes open, when he looked at Mal, he smiled as though everything he saw was all he’d ever ask for.
Mal hadn’t spoken much while Danny told him the tale of his deepest pains and fears. Even now he wasn’t sure what words would be enough, so he simply held Danny and smiled, waiting patiently for him to continue.
