She weighed nothing for someone such as me. But carrying her against me shook me to my very foundation, and I trembled.
Because every fibre of me wanted to make her mine.
* * *
I was beginning to consider hanging on a cloud as passé, considering it no longer worked for me.
I’d been doing it for hours, ever since I’d carried Anna back to her room. Mostly because I was trying to find a reason not to depart.
There were many, of course. The primary one being that Xumi wanted me. And not dead, either.
If she got her talons on me, I’d be better off that way. And that, I told myself, was the major reason I still hung around up here.
But shards. I needed to be gone.
By the time I’d placed Anna on her bed and backed away, I was in a state that I could not hide from either Matt or Bess. Hours later, I was still aching and hard. Even the icy-cold air at forty-thousand feet provided no relief.
I flew. For hours. Thinking of ways forward. But my mind and body continued to be preoccupied. I ached with every beat of my heart. It made it impossible to think. I needed clarity, and I couldn’t do so when immersed in this lust-driven haze.
Lust.
With resignation, I dropped to the mountains below me. Found a cliff that would serve. My body ramped instantly in anticipation, but it would go nowhere unless I embraced what Xumi had done to me.
I landed with a thump, my beast already at war with my human. My Dragon didn’t want this. I was afraid to clarify just what it wanted—Anna, or Xumi.
Because it could be either. Or both.
Transforming to human in this state was excruciating, but instead of diminishing my ardor, it amped it. By the time I was naked and human, I was so rigid the pain of it left me gasping.
Which only fed into my situation—a vicious cycle that I couldn’t break, no matter how hard I tried. I was so twisted inside, I could no longer find my way through.
I wanted to think of Anna. My beast longed for her. But I couldn’t bring her into the mess that I’d become.
So I focused on the one who’d warped me. The thick, cloying scent that drove me wild. Not her own—Xumi harvested the pheromones from others. The beast in me had as little choice in its reaction to them as my human.
Even the memory of it had me quivering. But it wasn’t enough—it was never enough. With one hand on my shaft, I folded the other into a fist. Pulled it back. And slammed it with everything I had into the cliff behind me.
Pain lanced through me, and my rigid flesh leaped in response. I gritted my teeth and did it again. Bones cracked, and the agony suffused me, feeding into the stroking from my other hand—up and down with a twist at the end that robbed me of breath as effectively as my broken bones. One more would do it. I braced, and then clobbered the stone one more time—and the surge of agony from my fractured fingers carried me over the edge. I fell to my knees as my body released, every pulse taking a piece of me with it.
As my breathing calmed, I rested back on my heels. My hand was afire with agony, but it would heal with the shift. It wasn’t as though it was the first time I had been injured. There weren’t many of my bones that hadn’t been broken at one time or another.
It was worth it. My mind cleared, and I was free from obsessive thoughts.
For now.
I examined my hand and straightened the broken fingers, gasping as the pain threatened to undo all the hard work of the last few minutes. Then I embraced the shift. As my wings spread, my thoughts raced with possibilities.
I had two issues. One only time might resolve. But unless I bought my way free from Xumi, I wouldn’t have that opportunity.
She wasn’t precisely the maternal type. Pursuing the killer of her youngest offspring was more of a principle thing than a passion. One that could possibly be laid to rest if the offer was sufficiently tantalizing.
My gut twisted. Because it wasn’t about the death of her son, and I knew it. But the Sabres might just be tempting enough to set me free.
With powerful beats of my wings, I climbed into the sky. My instincts said I should run. They also demanded that I be smart and take the collateral with me.
So why was I still here?
The answer was simple.
