Page 74 of Acceptance
“You’re big and tough with the club watching three feet away, huh?”
“Outside then,” she says and walks to the door, holding it open. “Ladies first.”
Clenching his fists, he knows he has no other option than do as she says if he doesn’t want to be shot dead by at least five men in this room. He walks outside and says, “You know, you’re acting a little too much like—”
Her fists slapping against his chest repeatedly force him backwards. It doesn’t really hurt, but he’s surprised once again by her outburst of violence.
“You took her virginity, and you didn’t think about how attached she’d become? Then you had those stupid fucked-up rules and dropped your end of the bargain. Are you stupid?”
“Hey!” he shouts, grabbing her wrists to stop her. “You’re only doing this because you know I won’t hit you back.”
“You wanna hit me?” she asks, pulling her arms from his. “Go ahead. You may be as big as a building, but you’re not a speeding SUV. Pretty sure I can handle it.”
“Knock it off. You don’t understand what’s actually going on.”
When she turns, he thinks she’s about to storm inside, but she climbs onto the picnic table instead to be more at his eye level. Just like the stairs.
“I’m the only one here who has any idea how she feels. It hits pretty fucking close to home for me.”
“What are you talking about?”
She sighs and looks over his shoulder into the night sky. “Look, as a girl, your father is generally your first experience with love. Just like a boy and his mother. It sets the stage for what you expect with future partners.”
Annoyed and ready to get inside, he shakes his head. “What are you talking about?”
“My brother hated me with a passion and tormented me growing up, and my father downplayed all of it. To this day, he will die on the hill that I’m overreacting. That teaches a girl what she deserves, and he proved I wasn’t worthy of being cared for.”
“Yeah, and you’re really in such a bad place, aren’t you? Wife of the President with four kids and an entire club doting after you. Yeah, you really have it tough.”
Shaking her fists at her side, she lets out a frustrated cry. “What is with you men? Are you just born arrogant assholes, or is this something you acquire once you hit the age of thirteen? You don’t know what it took to get me here, but you assume youdo. And then you talk down to me like you know best. Guess what? You fucking don’t.”
Her reaction shocks him. “What am I missing, then?”
“Quick history? I was forced to leave Griffin’s Beach because I almostdied, then I came back when my mobster ex-fiancé tried to rape me and put me in the hospital. He followed me, finally got me, and beat me within an inch of my life. My father set a standard that made me think I deserved to be treated poorly.”
Undertaker gapes as his eyes widen. “What?”
“Talk to Jennings and ask him. My reckless and destructive past behavior was actually a cry for help. A… way to get my father to see I was worth more than he thought I was. I’ve been beaten, kidnapped, tortured, and used as an emotional punching bag because I always thought I deserved it. It’s the reason I ended up in therapy.”
“You’re in therapy?”
“Do you have any idea how long it takes to accept that it’s not my fault my father doesn’t love me the way I need to be? VP set the stage for how I see myself and my worth, and it’s not easy to undo all of that thinking.”
The strongest woman he’s ever met just admitted she’s talking to someone outside the club about her issues. “I guess it’s good you’re getting help.”
“That’s why I understand Jamie. She’s spent her entire life feeling like she’s not good enough and doesn’t mean anything. Then you come along, feed her a line that would send most women running, and she thinks she’s found everything she’s ever wanted.”
The rules. It always comes back to the fucking rules. “Lex—”
“You made her feel like she mattered, and then you just dropped her. Just like everyone else in her life has.”
“That’s not what happened.”
Lex levels him with a glare, and he feels a small twinge of fear. “When I asked where your girlfriend was, you didn’t even think about Jamie. Nina was all you had on your mind. Explain to me how youdidn’tforget about her.”
“Okay, that—”
“Was a rhetorical question. You’re big and intimidating, so most people don’t call you on your bullshit. But I will. You did exactly what you promised you wouldn’t, and you treated her no better than her father did.”
