I close my eyes and lean my head against the icy window. The message replays in my head, haunting me until I force myself to watch the real one again. Over and over. Disturbing, stabbing me with…
“He’s in pain. He…”
Anna nearly jumps at my gasp. “You remember something?”
I clench my eyes shut and struggle to pull together details of the foggy scene. “A speech. I didn’t understand what he was saying but a man injected Daniel with something. It was like a…I don’t know what it did, but it hurt him a lot, and then…” The blurs begin to take form. More streak in. And more. Suddenly, a rushing flood pounds against my skull, and I cry out at the force.
I vaguely feel Anna’s hands on my arms, guiding me toward the bed, while the memories continue their assault. Whirlwinds of thoughts, emotions, and faces pack together and separate in endless waves. I can’t see. I can’t breathe. I’m going to suffocate from the pressure. It’s a tsunami of sensation crashing over me all at once when—
It stops.
I blink and gaze over at Anna, shaking violently. “I remember,” I whisper. “I remember everything. You gave him the green pills.”
Anna looks shattered as she nods. “I didn’t want to, but it seemed like the only way out for him. You changed everything that day.”
Chills sweep through me as the terrible memories beat against me. Even worse, I have no idea what to do with them. I assumed the path would be clear when my mind healed, but now I feel even more helpless.
My blood pumps like sludge in my veins. “Was that the deal he made? My release for his full cooperation?”
Anna doesn’t respond, and I close my eyes. My nails dig into my palms. “They’re still experimenting with that pain shit, aren’t they?”
“I don’t know details of a deal, but yes they’re experimenting with the serum.”
“I guess that explains his state. How often?”
“Almost every day.”
My entire body goes cold. Every day? It’s been weeks since I left.
Enraged muscles stiffen into fight mode. Old hatred returns, steeling for an ill-advised march from the hospital to take onClausen. Right now. I want to punch my fist through his throat before the day is out. Patience is a virtue I exhausted days ago.
I push up from the bed and move toward the closet.
“What are you doing?” Anna asks.
“Looking for my clothes. Wait, is my room bugged?” I glance around with concern.
“No. I took you outside that day because I didn’t know how you’d react to my revelation. I didn’t want to attract attention. I’m supposed to be your bug. I’m their spy.”
I study her, remembering Daniel’s message. If he trusts her, I will also. “So, is that the next step then? You’re going to convince them to release me?”
Anna nods. “I’ll assure them it’s safe. You’ll have to undergo a discharge review, which could be challenging. Whatever happens, make sure you don’t let on that you remembered anything.”
“Trust me. I get it. Then what? How do I get back into Madison?” The closet is empty except for hospital supplies. I’ll have to ask for my belongings.
Anna scoffs. “Get back in? Absolutely not. You can go home to your mother, or anywhere else you’d like, but you’ll have to forge a life that proves you have no recollection of Madison Academy.”
I slam the closet door, and she shoots me a warning look. “Quiet! They can’t suspect you’re upset.”
“Upset? I’m beyond upset. I can’t believe you’d even think for a second I’d go play house with my mom while Daniel’s still in there being tortured. I’m going back for him.”
“Hey,” she says, taking my arms and guiding me back to the bed. “I know you want to help him, but you have to trust us that barging in is not the way to do it. I don’t know if Daniel has a plan, but I know he sacrificed in unspeakable ways to get you to safety. Right now all we can do is assure him that you remember again. Beyond that, I couldn’t tell you more if I wanted to.”
“I’m going back.”
I’ve never seen the kind woman so angry. “Rebecca.”
“I’m going. Back.”
