I just quit my job.
I quit my job after making a huge scene that could possibly result in me being charged with assault.
I quit my job after physically attacking someone just before stripping my shirt off in front of a ton of people.
My eyes fly open and I scramble against the brick, quickly cover my chest and thank the stars I make sure to wear a bra anytime I leave the house. Havok eyes me wearily as I scan my surroundings and shoots to his feet as soon as he realizes I’m looking for an escape.
Oh my gosh, I made everything so much worse.
It was bad enough that I pretended to have friends, worse when I realized what I feel for Havok goes deeper, but then I had to pile on with threatening Joyce over him and getting half naked.
Oh, this is so bad.
So so bad.
And so unlike me.
"I have to go!" I blurt as I start toward the alley. "I have to get out of here."
"Gypsy girl, wait!"
I start running the second I round the building but Havok's long legs catch up quickly and he grabs my arm and spins me toward him. "What happened back there?"
I tug, pull my arm back, and try to get away. "Let me go, please, just let me go."
"Wait, Gypsy, please. Let me help you. Tell me what happened."
I break free from his grip as the first tear rolls down my cheek. "I broke my one rule!" I cry as I run across the street. "I broke my rule and now I have to go!"
He's chasing me again, running while begging me to stop but I don't.
I keep going, dodge branches, and leap over obstacles as I cut through the woods and try to lose him.
I can't believe I was so stupid.
I've ruined everything just because I was dumb enough to break my rule.
And the worst part is, the further I try to get from Havok, the more my heart breaks and I don't understand why.
"Gypsy, stop!" His hands wrap around my arms, and tug me back against him. "Please, angel, just stop and talk with me."
"No..." I sob. "I have to go… I have to… I broke my rule..." My arms pull, legs kick. "I don't understand any of this..."
Havok holds me hard against him, let's me fight as he whispers in my ear. "I've got you, my angel. Talk to me. Let me help."
A surge of adrenaline rushes through my body at his words and I finally get free of his hold. "That's just it! You can't help; no one can!"
"I don't understand. Please, let me—"
"Stop! Just stop!" I fist my hair, my tears falling freely. "Everything about being here is wrong! I let my guard down, broke my rule, and now I'm paying for it with fucked up visions and skull splitting headaches that make me do crazy things! I broke my rule and it ruined everything!"
Havok takes a few steps toward me, hands raised like he's dealing with a scared animal. "Gypsy girl, I want to understand. I want to help you but I can't do that if you do not explain what the fuck is going on. Tell me what happened."
"I don't fucking know what happened! I don't know why I went psycho on Joyce, I have no fucking clue what I even said to her, and I sure as hell don't know what keeps happening to me every time I'm around anyone with a goddamn accent!" Instinctively I clutch the gears on my necklace. "I feel like I'm going crazy! I keep seeing things, things that don't make any sense, things that can't be real!"
"What do you see, angel? Tell me what you see."
The hope on his face makes even less sense than all the fucked up shit going on in my head, and every time he calls me angel pain pierces my tattered heart and my stupid brain.
