They’d never told him thewhyof their separation. He was just forced to accept it, just as he was forced to accept that the once broken patch was now magically mended.
What kind of sick, twisted fairytale did it paint?
I don’t understand your love,he felt like yelling.
He wanted answers, but at the same time, he didn’t know how to voice his questions. So he swallowed them, along with hisbanana, and informed his parents he was going to game with Jae upstairs.
Just as he set up his PC, his phone buzzed. It was probably Jae, asking him if he was ready to start the game. Grabbing it, he checked who it was.
Missed call from Nina.
On cue, his heart picked up its pace. Why was Nina calling him? He quickly messaged Jae that Nina was calling him, and that their gameplay might be delayed.
Then, he dialled Nina’s number.
“Nina?”
“He has someone.”
The reaction was immediate. A turmoil. A part of him leapt in glee that Carlos hadn’t returned her feelings.
It means you still have a chance.
But another part felt heartbroken at knowing Nina had faced rejection.
“Oh Nina…” he started, after a few moments of stretched silence.
“I was actually, like, I was starting to tell him how I felt when he stopped me, before I made a further fool of myself. He has a partner, living in New Zealand. A long distance relationship that’s been strong for three months. He never mentioned his boyfriend before, so that’s why I assumed - I also wanted to wait for the timing since he only broke up with this girl he dated in our cohort like a year ago but - I’m sorry I’m rambling.”
“No, it’s okay, don’t be sorry,” he scrambled for the right words, the ones that would make Nina smile again, even if he couldn’t see it. “I’m sorry. Putting yourself out there - that’s so - you’ve always been admirable for that. And I’m sorry he didn’t give you the response you wanted.”
“He let me down easy, at least. He told me that I’m beautiful, and I’m amazing, and all of that. And that he wants to be in mylife as a friend, but he doesn't know if he can be anything more. Wait - God -” she sniffled a little, and Seth wanted to burn down buildings over it. “Sorry I already called Veronica and Celine before this, and already had my little cry. It’s a bit silly, actually, he was so nice about it, and there’s no hard feelings at all. I’m happy that he’s happy and has a loving partner. And I promise you, I’m not that super beat up or miserable over it, it’s just -”
“You don’t need to explain,” Seth whispered. He closed his eyes, imagining that Nina was here, so he could hold her. So he could wipe away her tears. Make her laugh.
“I just - I want someone to see me, one day. Like, obviously I know that I don’t need to have a partner or whatever, to be happy. And it’s not like I think Carlos will be the only guy like that for me. But it would be nice, just having thatsomeonewho sees you, you know? I think I’m just yearning, a little pathetically.”
He wanted to tell her thathedid. That he sees her in ways that nobody else could. That perhaps it’salwaysbeen that way.
“Nina,” he said, his voice thick with everything unspoken, “You’reyou.If there’s anyone that could findthatsomeone who sees you, and where you see them entirely, it’s you.”
“You’re right. Just,ugh.It’s just a sucky situation, that’s all. But I’ll be good. I’ll be okay. I’m just happy I can still be his friend. I just wanted to update you, since you helped me with that final push to tell him. I don’t regret it, at all, so thank you Seth. It’s funny, I kind of forgot the thrill of it all,” that made her chuckle, making him sigh with immense relief.
“You mean, when you screamed out how much you liked me in front of everyone? Is that the thrill you’re speaking of?” Seth recalled, his tone teasing, and Nina groaned.
“What did I say about mentioning thepast.God - so cringey.”
He shook his head. If only she knew how much of the past he wanted back.
“Did you want to watch anything together? To cheer you up?”
“We’ve been watching so much of what I like…why don’t you pick?”
“Butyouneed cheering up.”
“You being on the phone with me is cheering me up,” Nina confessed, and his heart pounced. He paused, his words stuck on his tongue, and Nina must’ve felt awkward too, because she coughed a little.
“You mentioned once that you and Jae like to game? Why don’t you screen share it on Discord or something, and I’ll watch?”
