“Because if you’re punishing me, it meansmy family is safe. I’d suffer your wrath for the rest of my days to keep you locked in hell with me.”
Harriett
“You find trouble wherever I put you,” Leopold scolds me as he kicks me awake.
My hair sticks to the floor, where I lie in a puddle of vomit. I stink of acidic filth. My naked body curls inward to hide from his too-observant eyes. He’s seen every inch of my flesh and witnessed my most private moments with Phin, but I’ve been domesticated to hide my nudity from men. Old habits get humans through the worst of trauma, so my feminine manners rush to the forefront of my brain. Plots of escape are shoved out of the way by shame at the state of me.
“You found your new home,” he sneers. “You will live in here once you earn it. For now, get up. I’ve telegraphed the World’s Fair commission to change my exhibit details. I expect their reply in the next few hours—probably with a request to see the state of my work in the flesh—your flesh in particular. This meansyou must look the part.”
He yanks me to a seated position by my elbow. My head lulls around on my shoulders. He must have drugged me again because I can’t seem to keep myself together. Clouds float into my thoughts when I try to focus. He’s talking, but I can’t make out the words. Do I want to know?
“Drag—Heavy—Dumb—Mess—” Leopold’s anger accelerates his words, which makes them harder to understand. What’s wrong with me?
“Did you drug me before you moved me? That was a dumb move,” I say, but my words come out in a groan. My lips struggle to make the shapes of the letters.
Oh no, this can’t be good. Leopold removed his shirt. Why did I ever yearn for his saggy, wrinkly body? Was it because he was the only man to give me attention? Was it my wanton desire, marital obligation, or selfish pride hiding the shame of him as my husband in name only? My mind is as foreign as someone else’s, so I have no answers.
He loops his arm under my knees with the other around my shoulders. I roll against him due to gravity, not any effort on my part. My cheek thumps against his chest. There’s a mole the size of a silver dollar inches from my nose, but I can’t turn my face away. He grunts and strains to lift me to no avail. Ironic, seeing as how he blamed my lack of curvesfor our chaste marriage. After three attempts, he drops me.
“Don’t make yourself heavy!” He grabs my hands and drags me. A screeching sound follows us as my sticky thighs catch on the smooth floor.
“Why am I like this?” My words are still a chorus of moans. Have I lost my ability to speak?
“Your dose is too high. Let me write that down,” he says, releasing my arms to notate my distress in his notebook. My body flops to the floor with a crack. “Dammit, you Dumb Dora, now you’re bleeding! Can’t you do anything right? Just lie there and don’t do anything stupid. Is that so hard?”
I can’t help it. I laugh. My torso shakes with the effort, but the humor blows the fog from my head. He drops me, but it’s my fault I’m bleeding…after he overdosed me on God knows what. My fragile psyche can’t handle the injustice, the absurdity, and the desperation of my situation. What can I do to help myself? Why did I wake on the floor in the first place?
Phin’s nursery. My future home if I don’t find Phin and escape.
Where will we go?
“Let’s try this,” Leopold says, shoving smelling salts under my nose. I try to pull away, but he locks me in a headlock until he’s satisfied. “Pupils finally constricted. You are a simple creature, aren’t you—barely conscious when fully alert. What a wonderful world you must live in with such a vapid mind.”
I let him jab at me because they are just words. The more compliant I am, the less likely he is to restrain or drug me. I know I’m bright, so I don’t need his affirmation. I’m not the one who craves outside validation. More suitors rejected me for the knowledge my father passed down to me than any of my other faults. Nobody wanted a female botanist…except Leopold. He told my father I’d work in the lab with him. I thought he lied, but I guess not. I started as his maid, and now, I’ve worked my way to his subject of study.
This time he lifts me from under my arms, and I can step my feet beneath me. I sway as I stand before him, but it’s better than plastered against his rubbery chest. Why was he ever the star of my fantasies? If I knew what lay beneath his clothes, I wouldn’t have bothered…or did I have a choice? I guess I did, because I chose Phin.
Phin, with his sweet, lipless smile and strong arms. He carried me like a blushing bride from the swamp to this dungeon. Trudging through the murky grounds, he didn’t wear shoes but never stumbled. His breath never labored on the journey. I know because I listened to the steady beating of his heart to calm my nerves. His bright green eyes and the love shining within them grounded me. Now I must endure whatever Leopold plans to save Phin.
One thing is certain, I’m proud of my choice of father for my children.
My shoulders thump against Leopold’s chest, popping my daydream of Phin like a soap bubble. As he walks forward, I must walk forward in lockstep or else get trampled. My arms swing in lazy arcs over his elbows as if I’m strolling through the gardens. Our heads bounce with the large steps, clanking at the temples. Our shadow is one of a two-headed monster, which I hope doesn’t inspire Leopold’s next round of experiments. I can’t let him splice my children and stitch them back together—no matter what births from me.
Leopold reaches for the door and throws it back with a ghastly grunt. The breeze throws my hair, which resettles in sicky clumps on our faces. Leopold spits when a clump lands in his mouth. I hope he tastes how vile I found his little dungeon/nursery setup. My skin prickles as I traverse his regular laboratory without clothes. A macabre kinship shines in the eyes of the hybrids in their cages as if they knew this would be my fate. Or perhaps they revel in my downfall to become what I’ve despised for years.
I gasp when he opens the door to the hallway. The audacity to walk naked through one’s house! Basking in the moonlight while using the shadows and tall reeds to preserve modesty is onething. Trapsing around in broad daylight is quite another. How indecent!
How wonderful.
I’m free from the shackles of society. Why should I obey the insufferable housewife rules and roles if I can’t have the glitz and glamor of sidecar cocktails and speakeasy dancehalls? I’d strut to my private rooms if I didn’t want to keep Leopold unaware of my growing strength. My back arches to lean heavier onto him.
“Sleep it off,” he yells as he pushes me across the threshold of my bedroom. I fall to my hands and knees to play the part of the overdosed, delirious patient. “Tomorrow, you must look your best. I mean it, Harriett. Local scientists are visiting to inspect my findings on behalf of the World’s Fair Commission. You must be the shining assistant you were for your father…except without speaking. Yes, your role is the demure mother…like the silent vessel of feminine grace and charm. Can you do that?”
“Yes,” I croak, rubbing my belly to soothe my hatchlings. They’ve had a traumatic time in my care, but not for long. We must escape tonight before more people are involved in Leopold’s madness. If Leopold manages to ship off Phin and me to a city lab, I’ll never see my lover again. I may as well kiss our hatchlings goodbye, too. Once I birth them, I’ll be disposable.
How could I return to polite society knowingmy family would be prodded and poked by civilized men for the rest of their lives? Or worse, what if they try to take the project from Leopold, and he kills us to prevent the transfer of proof? While the arrival of World’s Fair officials and God knows which scientists excite Leopold, I’m brimming with dread. I must get out of here, but where is Phin? Do I dare ask?
The lock clicks, barring my chance to ask. I crawl to my bed and pull my nightgown to the floor. With my weight on one end and my fingers gripping the other, I tear it into bandages. The locked door blocks my way to the bathroom for a proper bath, so the wash basin will have to do. My knees scream in agony as I balance on them. My dressing table never seemed so tall.
