Page 58 of All of You
I plop down on the couch next to him. “What would Meave say?” I ask.
Gramps wipes his mouth with his fingers and chuckles. “She’d be sitting where you are doing the same damn thing.”
I smile at him. I like the thought of her indulging her sweet tooth. “What was she like?”
“Meave? Well, she was…” he adjusts himself and mutes the TV. “She was wild and stubborn and had the worst sweet tooth of anyone I’ve known. She was the best cook and she was kind. The kindest. Heart of pure gold. And beautiful. I didn’t think she’d even give me the time of day when I first met her. It took me, well,” he chuckles, “according to her she said it took me a week and a daytoo longto ask her out.”
A laugh slips out of me.
“She was a lot like your mother. They butted heads a lot you know. I could never keep up with them. One minute they’d be fighting something fierce and the next breath they were giggling together.” His eyes crinkle at the edges as he looks at me.
“How long were you married?”
“Your Gran and I were together for five decades. But it only felt like a blip because that’s what love feels like. We watched the sunrise and sipped our coffee together every morning and we slept together every night but one. We were each other’s only loves until the day she left.”
My eyes well with tears. I blink them back so I don’t ruin the moment. I didn’t expect Gramps to be so…talkative.
He slaps a palm on my knee. “Don’t give me that look. We had a long, good life together.”
“I wish I’d met her. She sounds fun. I’m so sorry,” I say.
“Don’t do that,” he says while standing. “It wasn’t so devastating when she died because it death was so small compared to how she lived. She filled up everyone and every space with love. This whole damn town felt it.”
I bite my lip and nod, trying to hold back my tears.
He holds my gaze and then, “She would have loved you.”
“Thanks,” I say and stifle a sob.
We spend the evening together instead of apart.
He teaches me to play Gin Rummy, we walk through the gardens, and he tells me all about the plants Maeve (Gran) tended to, I smell flowers and desperately wish I’d gotten the chance to know her.
Twenty Nine
Langdon
I’m hiding. I have to pee so badly. I really want to move but I will not. I’m too competitive to lose and if I get up—I’ll be found and being found is how you lose.
I shift a little in the small space. The jackets above me rustle and I silently curse myself. Anderson and his bullshit need for attention. The whole damn house is hiding, Mom, Dad, me. All to appease him. He’d really sealed the deal when he’d all but cried stating it was for Olivia.
Any of the past three years, this wouldn’t have happened. It would have sent everyone into a tailspin of tears and grief. Into athink about today. About what you can control right now. Go hour by hour if you have tokind of mentality.
But then Jennifer came back and all of a sudden Mom hasbeen… better. When Mom’s better we’re all better. When she’s not, we all tiptoe around trying not to make our lives seem too great or big or livable.
I don’t understand the parent-child relationship. Bridges and the waters below, just clues left behind. So many secrets and things unspoken. Don’t they understand that the unspoken things do the most damage to the kids?
The fear of letting go though, that’s the real doozie, I think. Fear can only hold you captive for so long though and I think maybe Jennifer coming back and Mom seeing her has helped her let some of it go.
I don’t understand why until Delia and her mom showed up, Mom never once mentioned her before. Regardless, it’s Monday, and playing hide and seek with my family is not how I’d like to be spending the night.
My mind wanders to Delia as I sit tightly balled up in the closet. Mom’s been found—she sucks at hiding. I can hear Anderson laughing.
What the hell was she doing in Danny’s car today? Thedayafter we messed around. How could she be with him? It pisses me off to think that perhaps she wasn’t as riled up and stuck on our make-out session last night. That she didn’t feel what I felt. It was the only damn thing on my mind all night and all day.
I hadn’t exactly meant I’d distract her with my lips but thelook on her face when I suggested a distraction was pure desire and I’d just run with it. How could I not? When a girl hasthatlook in her eyes, you do not back down. I’d really only meant to avoid the Olivia playlist conversation.
It’s nice finally knowing someone who doesn’t know all your business.Ugh. Not that I regret the outcome. Delia feels like playing with fire. Like purposefully lighting a fire and constantly adding to it. Fanning it until it gets so big that it’s out of control. Delia’s skin on mine, pure fireworks.
