“Iknow.”
Helen was at least twenty years older than she was. They weren’t close friends, but Helen had taken on a motherly role in their relationship. She liked to check in on Carol to make sure she had enough to eat—as if that was ever aproblem.
Carol shifted her butt in the seat. Maybe if she’d lost some weight, she wouldn’t be working at such a shitty job, and she’d be able to hail a cab in the middle of the night. Oh well, it wasn’t her fault that society had such unreal expectations of beauty. Maybe she should move away from New York City, go out to the suburbs, and see if people were nicerthere.
“How did you get away from the mugger? And where are your clothes?” Helenasked.
Carol explained everything up until the point where she’d transformed into a bear. Helen was going to think she was on drugs if she told her the truth about that part. Carol hated lying, but there was no way Helen would believe heranyway.
“Someone came up the path and scared him away. He told me to take off my clothes, that’s why I don’thavethem.”
“But henever…”
“No.” A breath of relief whooshed out from her chest. It could have been so much worse, but she’d survived. Exhaustion seeped into every muscle in her body. She sagged against the back of the chair. “I’m reallytired.”
“You should report it to the police. Maybe they can find your purse,”Helensaid.
“Maybe. I’ll do it in the morning. There’s not much they can do about itrightnow.”
“Yeah, I hate to say it, but you might as well start canceling your credit cards tonight. You have a list of them,right?”
“Yes.” Carol smiled. She couldn’t help but wonder how her life might have been different if someone like Helen had been her mother. But she knew better than to dwell on questions that would never beanswered.
After ushering her only friend across the hallway, Carol waited until she’d closed and locked the door. Carol shut her door and engaged a bevy of locks. She was pretty sure the guy hadn’t taken her purse with him when he’d ran off, but someone else could have pickeditup.
She flicked off the living room lamp and checked the latches on the windows. Even though she was on the fourth floor, she made sure to inspect the locks every night. A fire engine’s alarm wailed as it streaked down the street. A few doors down, the television blared. Some nights, she’d give anything for five minutes of completesilence.
In her bedroom, she padded over to the dresser. She stood for a moment, unsure about whether or not she wanted to open the top drawer. After what had happened tonight, she wanted answers from her birth mother more than everbefore.
Why had her mother abandoned her? Where was her father? Hadn’t she been good enough for them? Was there something so inherently wrong with her that no one could everloveher?
Even if her birth mother couldn’t tell her the truth, maybe she would at least explain her shocking transformation into a bear. Maybe that’s why her mom had left her at the orphanage. She was a freak. What parent would ever want a monstrous baby? No wonder she didn’t have any friends. People probably sensed the awful beast lurking inside of her and ran theotherway.
She slid open the drawer and pulled out a worn, faded postcard. She stared at the image of Old Faithful. “Greetings from West Yellowstone” was printed across the top. Even though she’d already memorized the text, she flipped the card over andreadit.
Please take care ofthebaby.
She’d been droppedoff at an orphanage when she was just a few months old. The postcard had been hidden in the blanket in which she’d been wrapped. For years, she’d wondered about her mother. Was she from West Yellowstone? Why would someone cross the country only to abandon their baby? It didn’t make anysense.
When Carol had turned eighteen, she’d finally gotten up the courage to ask Harriet, the director of the orphanage, about her birth mother. Harriet hadn’t been able to help, other than to say that her mother had probably lived in West Yellowstone. Although the U.S. was getting more progressive in the 1980s, it wasn’t unusual for unwed mothers to go on an extended vacation so that they could have their babies in secret. Harriet didn’t know for sure, but she suspected that’s what had happened inhercase.
Carol stared at the postcard. Until now, she hadn’t wanted to find the woman who’d abandoned her. But after her experience in the park, she needed to find out why and how she’d changed into a bear so that it wouldn’t happenagain.
Armed with a single line of nondescript text, she was determined to find her birth mother. She opened her laptop and typedFlights to WestYellowstone.
* * *
Hank heaveda huge piece of wood siding off of the pile and carried it toward the barn’s frame. He lined it up and held it while Logan hammered nails to secure it to the support beams. A gust of arctic air rushed across the plain to freeze the sweat on his forehead. He welcomed the frosty blast. They’d been working on the siding for the last hour and although it was only twenty degrees outside, he’d already peeled off three layers ofclothing.
“I think it’s crooked,” Kate said. She stood ten feet away with her head cocked to one side. “Maybe not. What do you thinkLogan?”
Her husband walked to her side and wrapped an arm around her waist. “I think it looks right. We measured ittwice.”
“Measure twice, cut once. It’s what our dad always said.” Hank lifted his Stetson and brushed his forearm overhishead.
From across the field, he spotted Madison. She carried a huge picnic basket in each hand. Hank hurried overtohelp.
“Thanks,”Madisonsaid.
