Page 123 of Relationship Goals
My smile disappears, and I stare at her in shock.
“Erectile function?” Gold manages through a laugh.
The rest of the team is laughing, too, several pointing at me and holding their stomachs. My shock turns into a scowl.
Marino launches himself into a sprint, running for where Lauren stands, clearly at a loss. My own embarrassment pales at how rude the rest of the team is being to her. And, by extension, to Abigail.
“Fucking hell,” I mutter. My gaze shifts to where Abigail stands, her bandaged hand over her mouth as she watches Lauren flounder.
“This is no laughing matter!” Marino yells, standing next to Lauren and her miked-up headset. He gestures wildly. “It could happen to any of us. We should be thanking our good friend and teammate Wolfe for bringing this attention to us. To our attention, I mean.” Marino looks sincere and angry, and that, more than anything, surprises me the most this morning. “Lauren, bellissima, continue, per favore. Forgive my idiot teammates. They will understand soon how little we pay attention to the muscoli there.”
Even from this far away, I see Lauren’s chest rise and fall as she inhales deeply, then nods.
“Right, Thank you…”
“Enzo. Enzo Marino,” he says easily, then, to none of our surprise, he takes Lauren’s hand and presses a kiss to her knuckles. “Bellissima.”
With that, he turns around, giving us all a death stare.
“If everyone could move up and take a spot closer, that way I’ll be able to correct your form.”
No one moves except for Marino, who sits on the grass before the glinting Lauren.
I glance at Abigail, who continues standing stock-still.
“Fuck,” I repeat, and then I jog over to Lauren and Marino.
After I stare at him for a moment, Gold joins us, grinning at all of us in that easy way of his.
“Get your asses up here!” I yell at the rest of the team, frowning ferociously.
I will not let them ruin Abigail’s day because they’re a bunch of immature pricks.
“If taking care of everyone’s lower bodies—”
“Pelvic floors,” Lauren’s voice booms out over the crackling speakers again, and I hold in a wince.
“Right.” I take a breath, pinching my nose and gathering myself again. “If Coach and Lauren think this is important and will improve our gameplay and protect our bodies as we get older, then we should fucking do it. Now get your asses up here so you can focus on your anus.”
A couple of the guys laugh, but when I give them a glare, they glance at each other uneasily and finally form ranks around us.
“Luke Wolfe took the words right out of my mouth.” Lauren claps her hands together, clearly heartened by my impromptu speech.
“From his anus to your lips,” someone says, and a couple of the guys crack up.
That’s fuckingit.
“The next person who tries to say something funny about any of this can run wind sprints for the rest of the day, and I don’t give a fuck how many of you throw up. You will respect Lauren and her time, or you will be hurting.”
I glance at Coach Garrett, and he shrugs one shoulder in approval.
“Right. Now be respectful and focus on your anuses,” I bellow.
Chapter Thirty-five
Abigail
To say theteam exercise session did not go the way I planned is a gross understatement. I blow out a breath, sending my hair flying.