“So, the rumor’s true,” Keira says in a sharp voice.
“Wh…” I babble something, but no real thought comes out.
“My own sister is back in town after a decade, and she doesn’t even bother telling me.” She lets out a low puff of air through her nose. “Figures.”
“I just got here,” I say, as if I was planning on contacting her in the next few minutes. In truth, I did consider it, then repeatedly pushed it to a later time. The guilt that now has a constant place in my chest swells.
She would never believe me, but I’ve missed my sister more than anyone else here. I wish I could step forward and wrap her in my arms, smell her neck and figure out if she still wears the tangerine perfume she used to spray in obnoxious quantities before going out when we were teenagers. I wish she could smile when seeing me instead of scowling.
When I first left, I made the mistake of going no-contact with everyone for almost nine months. I know now it was horrible of me, but when I got to the city, the only thing I wanted was to put everything that had happened behind me and to start fresh. In my head, that meant ignoring everything from my previous life, including my family. Was that smart? Absolutely not. But I was eighteen and afraid, my life had been turned upside down, and I convinced myself this was the only way forward. I eventually realized my mistake and reached out to Ruth first, who didn’t hold it against me. She’d expected this when she told me to leave. Mom was just happy I’d finally called her. Keira, though, never got over it. In fact, she never answered my phone calls again after that. I spent the past decade trying to get in contact with her, to no avail. I emailed her on holidays and followed her life on social media, hoping she’d finally forgive me for being a stupid, heartbroken teen, but that never happened.
She hums, looking me up and down like she, too, wonders in just how many ways I’ve changed. “I didn’t want to believe Eli, at first. My sister in Ruth’s house? Impossible.”
So, he’s the snitch.
“I didn’t know you two were friends,” I say.
“Don’t know a lot of stuff, I think,” she snaps. Then, as if feeling bad, she explains in a smaller voice, “Xavier’s friends with his daughter.”
It makes sense. There’s only one daycare around, and Zoe is probably around my nephew’s age.
I swallow, then open the door wider. “Do you want to come in?”
“I don’t need you to invite me into Grandma’s house.”
Even as kids, Keira had the gift of making me feel smaller than a fly. I always tried to remain on her good side, just so I wouldn’t have to feel the knot that’s currently twisting my stomach.
“Sorry.” I’m not sure what I’m apologizing for exactly, but I know it’s well overdue.
Her chin tilts up. “So, what brings you here?”
“Got a call from Ruth’s lawyer.” I pull my sleeves down, shivering against the morning breeze. “She made me the executor of her will.”
Keira laughs then, the sound almost scary. “Of course she did.” At my frown, she adds, “She named me, too.”
I shouldn’t be surprised. It makes sense that she’d name her two grandchildren, even though Keira was never as close to her as I was. Maybe that changed in the past decade, too. I sure wish the lawyer would’ve told me over the phone, though.
“So don’t worry about it.” She has her back straight, standing as far away from me as is physically possible. “You can go. I’ll take care of it.”
“I’m staying.” The words come out more abruptly than I’d expected, and it’s at this moment I see just how much frustrationIhave toward her. “I didn’t get to attend her funeral. Wasn’t notified until it was done.” In fact, I didn’t learn she had passed until almost ten days after it happened. When she didn’t answer the phone for a few days, I started worrying, and only when I received the call from her lawyer did I get the dreaded news no one in my family had cared to share with me. That afternoon, I lay on my couch and stared at the ceiling for hours, too stunned for tears. Ruth was larger than life. She was the type of woman who asked her granddaughters to call her by her given name because she didn’t want to feel like an old grandma. I couldn’t imagine a world where she wasn’t hosting barbecue parties for her girlfriends, gossiping with them like teenagers throughout the night.
“Didn’t think you’d care.”
My body steels itself, all the things I want to shout at her boiling inside. “Thanks for your visit, but I’m not going anywhere until this is done.” If I wasn’t sure I truly wanted to stay before, now I know I’m not going to move an inch.
Her dark-green eyes narrow, jaw tightening probably as a mirror to mine. “And how long do you plan on staying?”
“A month.” Then, my forced sabbatical will be done, and I’ll be able to return to my life. “I’ll be out of your hair as soon as I can. Don’t worry.” In my wildest dreams, I could imagine Keira being happy I was here, but some part of me knew it would be like this, which is probably why I stalled in calling her yesterday.
“Fine.” She lays a protective hand on her belly, which I follow with my gaze. “I guess I’ll see you at the lawyer’s office, then.”
I exhale when she turns and climbs down the porch. However, my body freezes when she turns back to me. “Oh, and one more thing. Don’t think about messing with Eli again. He’s in a good place now and doesn’t need your drama.” Then, she makes her way to her truck and drives away, leaving me gaping. Somehow, this hurt more than all she’s said before. She knew how I felt about Eli before. Knew how much I cared.
I didn’t think I could fall lower than I already was, and yet every day proves me wrong.
Chapter 3
Iwas five years old when I learned there are different levels of love.
