“That’s not what we agreed.”
“I never agreed to you treating me like a child and making decisions for me without consultation. Especially ones that you know damn well I would not be okay with.”
His mouth snaps shut, and he says no more.
“Yeah,” I say. “That’s what I thought.”
“All I said is that I can see his side.” Leon sits beside Natalia on a blanket in the shade of an elm in our yard. He’s smoking another one of those fancy cigars. “He’s just trying to protect his girl. How is that so wrong?”
“Thank you, Leon,” says Dean, from where he’s measuring timber for the chicken coop nearby.
Natalia harrumphs. “His girl is a grown woman who can make her own choices.”
Trisha makes a noise of agreement.
There’s rain coming, making it perfect weather for gardening. Trisha and I are planting some of the seedlings and doing the weeding. Since Dean refuses to give me space, I am sticking to outdoor areas where ignoring him is easiest. Living in a community where people care about each other and want to be involved in each other’s lives is great. Right up until you’re having your first fight with your significant other and everyone is sticking their nose into same.
Therefore, I am ignoring Dean and this conversation. Because inviting Wolf Creek into our relationship sounds like a dreadful idea to me.
Back when we had televisions it might not have been such an issue. People could watch their soap operas or their dramas or catch the news. Get their fix of who’s doing what and what’sgoing on from the flat screen. Pedro and Naomi have been together for a few days already. They’re old gossip. One of the twins lost a game of cards the other night and had to run buck naked through town, apparently. Also, Vivianna was a concert violinist and gave a performance on their front porch yesterday. But right now, the only entertainment in town is me and Dean.
“She could have been killed the other day,” says Leon. “Of course he’s worried about her.”
Trisha sits back on her heels and fans her face with her ball cap. The day is warming up. “You can be worried about someone without taking away their agency. Love is having someone’s back. Not smothering them in bubble wrap. What Dean did was disrespectful.”
“He also told us she’d be okay with the meeting going ahead when he very much knew that was not the case,” says Natalia.
Leon sighs. “He’s in love. It’s hard for a man not to want to protect the person he’s given his heart to.”
“This isn’t about genitals or supposed gender norms,” chides Trisha. “Weshowlove. We don’t enforce it. And a love that takes away your rights is not a love worth having.”
Dean is frowning big time. I can see him out of the corner of my eye. I almost feel bad for him, having Natalia and Trisha on his case. Almost.
“He manipulated us and disrespected his wife,” says Natalia. “He has some thinking to do.”
As much as I’ve enjoyed watching Dean get a verbal spanking, enough already.
“I love you all,” I say. “But I am going to have to ask you to stay out of my marriage.”
Dean stares at me in shock. He’s subtle about it, but I can tell. Guess it’s the first time I’ve referred to what we have as a marriage. But it’s the simple truth. I am here with him for the duration. No one else interests me. This tangled andcomplicated relationship is it for me. Me and him, sitting on the front porch of our house watching the sun set for the next forty or so years, sounds like heaven. Having him hovering and figuring out how we work together. It’s all I want or need in this life he has given me.
He blinks and licks his lips and tells me, “They’re right about everything. Natalia and Trisha, I mean.”
“Fuck you,” mumbles Leon. “See if I’m on your side next time, son.”
“I am sorry. You have every right to make your own decisions. I got scared at the idea of you getting hurt again and panicked. I can’t say it won’t happen again because I’m not always exactly rational when it comes to you. But I’ll try to keep my shit under control. Because hurting you…disrespecting or disappointing you…they’re the last things I would ever want to do,” he says. Talk about giving good grovel. “Do you forgive me?”
I grace him with a queenly nod. “I’ll think about it.”
He snorts.
There’s a small chance I have issues with public nudity. When a sponge bath with a bucket of water doesn’t appeal, I head for the creek. Many of the town’s citizens go naked. Just let it all hang out. But I have a black swimsuit from the boutique in town. I mean, you never know who you might run into down there. Twilight is one of the prettiest times of the day. From the golden light of the last rays of sunshine to the silver mist of the coming night.
Pedro, Naomi, Nash, and Charlie haven’t yet returned from Sea Ranch. Hopefully this means the new group are interested in joining us. The twins are currently on patrol and listening for any updates from Naomi. Dean has stopped hovering and is making dinner. Though if I take longer than a quarter of an hour at the creek, he said he would come looking. And the childrenare busy with sticker and sketch books at the bed-and-breakfast. They had a big day. Natalia has started teaching them Spanish and George gave them lessons in safely starting a fire and how to read a map.
The water temperature is best described as refreshing. As much as I tell myself it’s warming up more every day, summer is still a while away. Avan checked my war wound and changed the dressing to a waterproof one. Throwing myself in is the best way. To get the shock of the cold water over and done with at once.
There’s no underestimating the spluttering and carrying on when I surface. One day soon we’re going to be able to risk the noise and run generators. We will have hot water for showers and everything will be good again. I long for that day. Sophie and the other children don’t seem to have any problems frolicking in the arctic water. But it steals the breath out of me.
