That impending doom settles in on my chest again, and I give Cameron a look that isn’t returned. I know what a trigger Cameron’s dad is to him, and I can see him shutting down. I know how hard he works to not let his father’s looming memory get the best of him, but clearly that’s not in the cards today.
“Well, as fun as this has been, I’m exhausted. I’ve got a paper due tomorrow, and I really think we should head home,” I say after what seemed like an eternity, effectively breaking this silent pissing contest the two of them decided to have right here.
“Yea, of course, Cherry. Let’s go.” Cameron stands abruptly. Alex looks as though she’s going to say something to stop us, but Cameron holds out his hand to her. “Have a great day. We will definitely be in touch about locations for the group. Talk soon.”
My hand finds his, and he grips my hand tighter as we head out quickly to the car. His hulking body lumbering behind me like a zombie.
His body is practically vibrating with rage and an emotion that I can’t quite pinpoint. I haven’t seen him this way for a while now. “Baby… Hey, look at me.” I gently press him up against his car. “Come back to me.”
I’m careful not to trigger him, my body is just close enough to him that he feels my presence. “Cameron, look at me.” I know that if I touch him, it could backfire on me and I could end up with his hand around my throat. His eyes seem far off and distant, but I’mnot afraid. I’m never afraid of him. He may be standing still, but his chest is rising and falling at a rate that I know isn’t good.
“Cammy.” I stand up on my tiptoes and whisper in his ear, our childhood nickname, my one standing defense against the monsters in his mind. “Cammy, you’re safe. Look at me. Look at your Cherry.” I gently push off his car, my arms around him, though still not touching.
“Hey, there you are.” It’s subtle, but it’s a flicker of his eyes towards me. I see him, the man I love coming back to me. “Hey you.” I coo softly, as he looks towards me now. Gently raising my hands, I cup his cheek, and he instinctively leans into my touch.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers, his voice hoarse as if he’s been screaming, though he hasn’t said a word.
“Shh, none of that, baby.” I stand up taller and gently kiss his nose. “I love you. Gimme the keys, I’ll drive us home,” I say softly, holding out my hand. Expecting Cameron to fight back, he hesitantly places the keys in my hand, and I walk him over to the other side of the car and he gets in silently.
The entire car ride home is void of conversation, his hand never leaving mine as we make our way there. I park and get us inside where immediately I lead him to our bed; without question, he crawls in and closes his eyes. Whatever monsters my love faces when it comes to his father, they have him in this chokehold. I want to protect him from it. I will do anything to make this man that I love so much, feel the same amount of love that he’s always given to me.
His vibrating body instantly softens when I place my hand on his back.
“You and me, Cammy. I’ve got you.” My voice floats over to him in barely a whisper. A soft smile appears on his face. “I love you.”
Chapter 37
Tear Down the House
Cameron
Leyla had to talk me down again; I’ve been losing myself a little bit more every day and I feel like I’m going crazy. The air around us changed since the other night. Leyla’s asleep on the couch as I pace around the bedroom, trying to rationalize what the fuck is going on right now. I’m losing control and I don’t like it.
A sudden ringing cuts through the quiet like a blade. I snatch the phone off the nightstand, heart already beating faster when I see Zack’s name. My eyes flick towards Leyla’s sweet and peaceful body, her chest rising and falling as if there’s not a care in the world. Good.
I’m at least doing something right.
He doesn’t call unless it’s serious. Not anymore, it’s encrypted messages only. He’s smarter than that but with the loss of control of everything, I can’t help but feel the impending sense of utter fuckingdread surging through my veins like sludge, catching on every crevice, and leaving darkness all in its wake.
“Yeah?” I answer, already on edge. My fingers clench my phone tighter than normal, my knuckles turning white.
“You need to listen to me, and don’t say anything until I’m done,” he says. His voice is sharp, low, like someone could be listening even from where he is— miles away, across state lines. I feel my legs ready to give out from underneath me.Fuck.
I know better, I don’t say a word.
“I got a ping,” Zack says. “Old contact of mine in law enforcement. Not local. He says the detective pulled your name. Leyla’s, too. There are surveillance orders out. She’s having you watched.”
I stand up, the floor cold under my feet grounds me for a moment. My gaze falls to Leyla’s sleeping form once again; she’s safe, she’s right here.
“What the hell do you mean she pulled our names?”
“I mean she’s making it official. She’s not just sniffing around anymore, Cam. The bitch is building something. Or trying to.”
My eyes dart to the window. The street outside is empty, but it suddenly feels too quiet. Manufactured. Like someone’s waiting for movement.
“Did your tip give you any inclination as to what Alex is after?”
“No. Just that she’s pushing harder. And that you and Leyla are being followed— nothing major, just patterns. Cameras. Unmarked cars. Eyes.”
