I quietly closed the door and looked around. Kinsley’s house was small. The living room and dining room were an all-in-one deal. There was a bottle on the table, and I made my way over to it. Estazolam, prescribed to her.
I took a picture of the label and did a quick search. Sleeping pills. There were roughly twenty-eight still in the bottle. I should tell Marcel, but then he’d want to know how I knew. I wasn’t about to out myself as the fucking creeper I’d become. So much for not keeping secrets. I consoled myself with the promise that I’d tell him eventually.
Right now, though, I didn’t even know how to articulate how she made me feel. So trying to tell Marcel about it tonight wasn’t happening. I made my way to her bedroom, standing in the doorway for a minute before stepping closer.
I knew how wrong this was—how this somehow put me on the same level as some of the sick fucks we regularly took out. But I couldn’t help myself. Scratch that; I didn’t want to help myself.
Staring down at the curled-up girl holding a ridiculous pink stuffed bunny, I smiled. When she shifted, I saw the bunny had a shirt with a picture of Vincent van Gogh on it. There were two others scattered about the bed.
Her dark lashes framed her closed eyes, and her hair fanned out across her pillow. Her full lips were slightly parted, and she’d kicked the covers off. Wearing only a tank top and loose boy shorts, I noticed how worn the shirt was. It must have been a favorite because I could see the outline of her nipples. This was a bad fucking idea.
It was official, I was a pervert.But damned if I gave a shit. My cock strained against my jeans when she shifted from her side to her back, inching her shorts higher. Groaning, I realized I could see up them if I tried hard enough. I fought everything in me not to look.
My mouth watered just thinking about being between her thighs, licking her, tasting her, and sucking on her clit. If she had picked Jenna’s card that night, I would have. Without even thinking, I picked up the stuffies and placed them back on the nightstand next to her.
I climbed onto the bed and took her in my arms, hoping the medication she had taken would keep her sleeping. I only wanted to hold her for a little bit, and then I’d leave. Pushing her hair back from her neck, I kissed it.
She smelled amazing; the honeysuckle scent was stronger tonight. My mind screamed at me to get up and leave, but hell if I couldn’t move other than to pull her closer. She sighed sweetly, and my body shook with want.
I was clueless and had no idea how, but she’d cast a spell on me. I wanted her as I’d never wanted a woman ever in my life. Facing her, I tried to tell myself to leave—to go now—when she drew closer, draping her leg over mine.
This was fucking crazy. I had to get up. I shouldn’t have touched her leg to move it because the minute her soft skin was under my fingertips, I was lost. A deep groan escaped as she ground her hips into me, and I froze. I closed my eyes and tried to focus, but my cock throbbed so hard it was torturous.
She moaned quietly and rocked her hips more. “Please, Alek,” she begged in her sleep.Fuck, she was dreaming about me. My hands instantly went to her round ass, and I pulled her hips into my hard cock. My fingers itched to slip beneath the gap in the shorts and touch her.
Muttering to myself, “Don’t fucking do it, don’t fucking do it” helped. I took a deep breath and went to stop her movements, but she doubled her efforts and began panting as she pleasured herself.
I knew this was a bad idea. Why I didn’t listen to the sane part of my brain earlier was beyond me. Now I had Kinsley rubbing her sweet pussy against my cock with no idea of what she was doing. She thought she was dreaming, but no, because I was fucked in the head, she was actually getting off.
And damn, if she didn’t finish soon, she was going to make me come as well. That was the third mistake I’d made this evening. Thinking about coming deep inside her had my balls agreeing it would be the best thing in the world to do.
“Reaper, can I come?” she moaned breathlessly, sounding desperate, and I lost it.
“Come for me, kitten,” I whispered in her ear as she shuddered beautifully, her body finding what it was looking for on my cock. On cue, my balls clenched, and I came in my jeans like a goddamned teenager with no control.
This is not happening.
I moved quickly so that it didn’t soak through my jeans onto her shorts. She whimpered at the loss of connection and bucked again, hitting her clit against my knuckle. I moved my hand to cup her pussy through her shorts, letting my thumb rest on her clit. She continued to rock softly against my hand until she sighed, and her breathing became even once more.
I gently slipped out from under her leg and let myself out, locking back up behind me. I walked back to my car with wet jeans and a sense of guilt I’d never felt before. Hating myself and what I’d just done, I vowed to stay away. To leave her alone like she’d asked.
Chapter 41
Nikolai
Road Trip
Several Days Later
Alek had stumbled in drunk one night last week, then spent the next four nights staying at the club. He was avoiding us.
“What did he say again?” I asked Ivan as we sparred.
“Just that he wasn’t into Kinsley anymore. I’ve got Charles on her. Alek wanted me to tell you to get Jason out to her house and install an alarm system.”
“Okay, and do we know if she asked for one?”
“Hell if I know, isn’t heyourtwin? If you’re so worried about him, why don’t you ask him yourself?”
