They continued walking, getting close enough that the vessels now surrounded them. But Kestrel remained focused on the one with the scorpion.
At the back of the giant caravan came a loud bang, like a heavy door slamming closed. Kestrel scanned the back for the source of the noise, surprised to find that she recognized the person exiting the other end. Efrem.
Micah dropped the sack that had been slung over his shoulder and bound for his twin brother. The two collided like they were drawn by an invisible force. Efrem released his brother, and with a wily grin, punched him in the shoulder. Micah jumped up, an arm wrapping over his slightly-taller brother’s neck as he wrenched him downward. He gave Efrem’s already disheveled, auburn hair a rough tousle before finally liberating him, and the two of them walked arm-over-shoulder, conversing enthusiastically as they went to the other side of the cargo where she could no longer see them.
There was a twang of jealousy pinching her insides, butmostly she just felt awestricken curiosity. And gratitude. So much gratitude that she was finally getting to meet people.
“Are you sure you want to do this?” Leighton asked, drawing her attention back to him. “You’d be putting your life in danger for a cause that you are not beholden to.”
Turning around, Kestrel faced the young man she had first met in the marketplace, only to find he had shed the tattered cloths and robes that had kept him disguised in Vallonde.
As he shoved the final pieces of old fabric into the back of one of the single-person carts, she noticed the regal garb he’d been wearing underneath. Now he donned a tunic the same color of the deepest depths of the ocean. The golden accents embroidered down the center shimmered in the sunlight and burst into a plume of designs across his chest that she wanted to run her fingers over. He reached into the cart and pulled out a cape to match, one with golden tassels that rested on his broad shoulders and made him look equal parts ravishing and intimidating. His height didn’t help. Now that he wasn’t weighed down by his disguise, she realized for the first time just how tall he was, maybe a whole head taller than her.
It was easy to see the king he would soon become.
Kestrel had to resist the urge to bow. She focused instead on his question, though it wasn’t an easy one.
“I’ve…lived a sheltered life. Thom raised me. And for all of that time, he led me to believe that the rest of the realm was too dangerous to venture into. Out of fear and obedience, I spent my entire life trapped in a tower, reading books and imagining what the realm could’ve been like if things had just been different, not knowing that what I dreamt of was already out there.”
Feeling small in his now domineering presence, Kestrel peered down at her hands. Hands that hadn’t done much in their time but could maybe do so much more. Her eyes driftedback toward Mutiny Bay, now hardly more than a blur on the horizon.
“As scared as I was to leave my tower, the whole time I was there, I longed for something more. I dreamt of adventure. Of freedom. Of seeing the kingdoms and being brave enough to defend them, as brave as Thom had been…” Kestrel had to pause to swallow the bubble ballooning in the back of her throat like a swarm of locusts. Finally, she met Leighton’s kind and striking gaze. “When you found me again, I was thinking that I didn’t know what to do with myself after all that. I knew I couldn’t go back to the tower. But I didn’t know anything about being out here; I didn’t know where to go next.
“I might not be beholden to your mission, but it gives me purpose. Makes me feel useful for once in my life. So, as much as I appreciate you trying to give me an out, I should honestly be thanking you for allowing me to join you.”
“Thanking me?” Leighton guffawed with a shake of his head. “I feel like I’m marching you into certain death.”
“You’re not though.” She grabbed his hand, not even thinking about it, and forced him to meet her eyes. “Not to sound dramatic, but it feels like the opposite. For the first time in a long while, I actually feel like I’m alive.”
He glanced down at their hands and his mouth twitched into a sad grin. “I think I know the feeling.”
Finally, realizing what she had done, she released his hand. She may have forgiven him, but that didn’t mean they could go back to being close likethatso easily. She still didn’t understand why he had lied to Micah about the kiss, why he had seemed so ashamed about it.
Glancing around them now, Kestrel noticed there were dozens of people—likely his men—bustling about, but that she and Leighton were still relatively alone, tucked away by one of the many contraptions out here.
Most importantly, there wasn’t a single brother in sight.
If she was going to ask him, now might be the only chance she had to get an honest answer out of him.
“What happened back in Mutiny Bay? When your brothers arrived, you…you were different. You lied to them about what we did.”
He kept his eyes downcast. “I’m sorry for that. I never meant to hurt you?—”
“Well, you did,” she bit back, not ready to let him off the hook so easily. “You made me feel like I was a mistake.”
Leighton’s hands twitched like they were going to reach out for her, but he stopped himself. His scanning eyes seemed to notice his regiment around them, and so instead he clenched his fists at his sides and kept his voice to a gentle whisper. “You could never be a mistake.”
Kestrel’s cheeks flushed, but it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t a full answer, and she wanted more.
“Then why did you lie to Micah about what we were doing?”
“I was caught off guard by their arrival, much like I was caught off guard by your forwardness—in a good way,” he added hastily, seeing the look of embarrassment that was starting to emerge on her face. “Being next in line to the throne comes with many responsibilities and expectations. My brothers, they have rules as well, but they’re much more malleable. For the most part, they can do what they want, when they want. Follow every whim and fancy. Whereas, I simply cannot. People look to me as their leader, and so I must act as one.”
Worrying at her lip, Kestrel tried piecing the rest together. “I understand. And soon-to-be kings don’t kiss lost commoners in alleyways.”
Leighton winced, but he didn’t correct her. It made heat prick her eyes again, only this time she wasn’table to fight it or flee. Instead, the sorrow consumed her. And not just because she wanted the first boy she ever kissed to be more than just a one-time kiss. It felt like so much more than just this one moment. For an entire lifetime, Kestrel had been left to her fantasies, to the stories she read and the happy ever after endings. When she had met Leighton, when they had kissed, all of those fantasies came piling into that one moment. They built it into something far greater than it was, and she should’ve known better. Perhaps any other nineteen-year-old would’ve. But she was new to this world, to the cruel twists of fate.
It was a ridiculous fantasy anyway. To think she might fall in love with someone so quickly—a prince, at that—and that he might love her in return.
