Niamh repeats what I said to presumably Connor, who must have walked into the room.
“You wouldn’t fuckin’ dare, Sammy!”he screeches at me, having snatched the phone off Niamh.
“Try me, you little weasel.” I hang up the phone before he can argue with me.
“I’m so glad I’m practically an only child,” Noah says dryly.
Noah technically has two half-sisters, Saoirse and Aoife. But his da, my uncle Rowan, left him to be raised by our great-grandmother, Orla when he was four. Shortly after, Rowan started a new life in the Limerick pack. He got married and had two daughters a few years later. I know Noah tries to have some contact with his sisters, but it must be difficult when the relationship between Rowan and him is so irreparably broken.
Despite Saoirse and Aoife also being my cousins, I’ve only met them twice, and once was at Mum’s funeral. From what I’m told, she was never very close with her brother, but then things really deteriorated after he left the pack because she could never forgive him for abandoning his son the way he did.
"I hope you're hungry. Here's your burgers and fries. Can I get you anything else?" the waitress asks sweetly.
There are sauces on the table already, so we both thank her, and she leaves us to our meal. I take a big bite out of my burger. Beef, melted cheese, and pickles are what my food dreams are made of. Gotta hand it to Americans; they make a mean burger and fries.
I pad on all fours several feet behind Noah, who’s looking for some kind of native shrub he wants to collect for a potion or whatever he calls them. I’m just enjoying being in my wolf form for the first time in a few weeks.
There’s so much thick forest here in Yosemite National Park that I was able to run for miles, weaving through the huge and imposing redwood trees. I’d seen photographs, but the reality of them was more overwhelming.
I come to a stop at the foot of one of the giant sequoias while Noah investigates some nearby overgrowth. I read online that these trees can live over 3,000 years. I wonder what they’ve seen? Survived? We must seem like fruit flies to them.
The base of the tree resembles the foot of a humongous elephant stomping through the forest.I read that these trees have naturally adapted to become fireproof, growing fibrous bark that can be two feet thick. I hope I grow a thick enough skin one day to be as resilient as a giant sequoia. But then I think it must be hard for anyone to get to the heart of it with such an impenetrable wall of protection, and that sounds more lonely than I can bear. It's probably not the best idea to project my insecurities onto a non-sentient tree.
“Sniff this, please,” Noah holds out a green plant with small pea-looking buds hanging off the end. I give it a sniff. It’s sort of earthy and sweet at the same time. I give Noah my best ‘what do you want?’ look. He’s used to reading my facial expressions as a wolf by now.
“I need around ten times this, and it took me an hour just to find one; think you could maybe lean into your inner spaniel and sniff some more out for me?”
This time, he gets my ‘don’t call me a dog when you want something from me’ look.
“You’re my favourite poodle.”
I sit back on my haunches and huff, not going anywhere.
“So sensitive. Please? I’ll do my little teleporting thing and bring back pizza for tea tonight?”
My mouth waters. Knowing him, he’ll go to New York and get the good shit too. Putting my pride to one side, I nose at the plant to commit the smell to memory and go in search of more.
Dear future Cara
We’re halfway through the trip now. This is our last night in Yosemite before we head towards some of the bigger cities in California. It’s been nice to have the space to run free in the forest.
We did the El Capitan trail today. We got up at the crack of dawn to do it before it was scorching. At the summit, I felt peaceful for the first time in a while. You know that feeling in your gut that tells you you’re on the right path? That you’re right where you’re meant to be? I felt that, and it was calming.
I’ve been out of range to email Sean for a while, and I miss him, but I know now that I need to do this. In one of his last emails, he told me that Alpha Robets wants to stand down soon, and he’s just waiting on Sean to tell him he’s ready to step up.
It hit me at the top of the mountain that one of the reasons Sean was so adamant I make this trip is because he knows it’ll be my first and last taste of freedom for a while.
Supporting Sean when he takes over won’t be easy. He hasn’t been in the pack for long and there are plenty of people who won’t be happy having someone they don’t know well as their Alpha. I think that’s where I have to bridge the gap. My familyhave been in this pack for generations, and people trust our judgement. I need to show them that I truly believe Sean’s the right Alpha for us moving forward.
Life for the next several years is going to be hard work. The skirmishes in Yorkshire have been getting more frequent. It’s like the Campbell pack can smell the changes happening and the unrest it’ll bring.
Sean says we just have to focus on watering our own lawn, and the daisies will grow. He has a lot of these phrases that I’m pretty sure he makes up on the spot, but I like them all the same.
I’m going to make the most of the next few weeks so I can come home and water my new lawn. Seasons change, and we need to adapt. I think I’ll be ready for Autumn when I get home.
From past Cara x
At the sound of footsteps outside the tent, I put the diary back in my bag. We’re getting up early tomorrow to do the same hike up El Cap. I hope I find some inner peace at the top like she did. Lord knows I could do with some.
