I fucking love it when she’s hard-assed and sassy. It ignites a spark within my core that’s just begging to explode out of my cock. I grit my teeth to keep from smiling and square my shoulders to come across all staunch and intimidating when I drive a firm finger toward the floor, to make my point appear more solid. “I work my ass off to be a fucking gentleman, Cadence Malone,” I argue. “Especially around you.”
She gives a half shrug and looks out the window. “A true gentleman wouldn’t have to work hard to behave, Daryl. It’d be innate.”
My breath grunts out of me, and I deflate faster than a punctured tire on an overloaded truck. “Touché.” She’s so fucking smart, and she doesn’t ever let me forget it. The agedifference never seems to matter between us when we talk, and it’s one of the many reasons I adore her.
She returns her attention to me and snorts softly. “If it makes you feel any better, I’ve never wanted you to be a gentleman. If anything, I hoped with all my might that you weren’t. I know an honorable man would refuse to do what I’m asking.” She shrugs again and looks down at her hands resting stoically in her lap. “It’s fine. Commendable, even. I know you’re a good man, and I was wrong to put you in a position to go against your values. It’s just hard to be me sometimes, you know?”
“I’ve imagined,” I admit quietly.
“You… Well, that’s just great.” Her tone is exasperated, and her eyes are pinched. “I thought you liked me, but the truth is, you feel sorry for me. Is that why you come and see me every day? Out of fuckingpity?”
I shake my head and try to regain my bearings. I don’t think I’ve ever heard Cadence Malone swear like that before. It’s both disorienting and exciting. She can be so repressed, and this whole conversation has thrown me into a spin. What’s come over her today? Because I’m fucking loving it, but it feels wildly unwise to let myself enjoy her so much. “I don’t pity you. I come… to check on you.”
Cady narrows her gaze at me. “Check on me for what?”
The nerves in my belly begin to tangle, and I shrug. “To make sure you’re still smiling. That your spirit hasn’t been broken.”
She sits quietly and watches me for what feels like far too long when her guarded expression is giving me no clues as to her thoughts.
After a time, she lifts her chin. “For what purpose would you need my spirit unbroken, if you have no intention of benefiting from it, Daryl Winters?”
I draw my brows down hard. “You think because I won’t fuck you, that you mean nothing to me? I come every day tomake sure you smile, but I’d be lying if I said I did it out of charity. Seeing your gorgeous fucking face light up is what gets me throughmyday. You think I like living in this shitty town any more than you do?”
She scrunches her face into the cutest, pursed, lemon-sucking expression and pushes to her feet. She leans over her desk, grips the edge, andgrowlsat me. And she’s so passionate in her affront, her knuckles have bleached white with ferocity. “You’re a successful, single, grown-ass man with every ability to leave, Daryl. If you hate Beaumont City so damn much, why the fuck do you live here?”
I grasp at the air in front of me. “Becauseyoudo.”
She releases her death grip on the desk and straightens. All aggression leaves her face as she pales. She stands very still, devoid of expression, except for the tiny flicker of fire that remains in her eyes. “What did you say?” she whispers, before shaking her head. “No. I heard it. I’m just not sure I understood it. Tell me what itmeant.”
I close my eyes and release a quiet groan. It’s time. I get the feeling this conversation may be the last we have if I leave her hanging now.Breathe.Relax. Be honest.Be yourself. Accept the result.
I open my eyes and zero-in on hers. “It means that I’m madly in love with a beautiful girl I can’t ever have. But I’d rather come here and torture myself daily than never see her again.”
“You… love me?” she asks, her voice pitched high in disbelief. “Madly?”
“And truly. And deeply.” I dip my head lower and try not to feel like a shy, vulnerable kid. “It’s hard not to, despite what your father may have you believing. He’s scared to lose you, so he does all he can to keep your sparkle small and invisible and safely under control, but your light is brighter than anything he could hope to dim. Cady, I see you. Your heart is too big to miss,and that’s probably why he works so hard to keep you protected. You’re worth it.”
“Since when?” The words seem to choke out of her. “How long have you known this… this information? Felt this… love?”
I fill my lungs, hold it a moment, and then release the breath slowly and surely. There’s no point holding back now. If she wants me to confess my feelings, so I may as well share them all. She chose this day to change the dynamic between us, and I’m going to trust her lead, because I shouldnotbe at the helm of this relationship. If I was, she’d be barefoot, pregnant, and screaming her pleasure for the whole town to hear — which would only result in me being dragged to the local jail cell under bogus charges her dad dreamed up. He’s clearly got the locals on his side, so I imagine my wrongful incarceration would likely precede an old-fashioned lynching by an army of torch-and-pitchfork-toting townsfolk, since that’d be the only way to keep me from ever seeing her again.
So. Cady’s in charge. She wants answers, and —gods help me— I’ll give this woman whatever she wants.
“I became fully aware of my feelings about two summers ago,” I admit, too scared to meet her eyes in case she thinks that’s a bad answer. “I saw you down at the pond hunting for tadpoles with the preschoolers. It was a hot day, so you’d unbuttoned your high-necked blouse a little. You were sharing your wisdom in a fun and cheeky, easy-to-learn way, and I have never wanted to know more about the life cycle of frogs than I did right then. Your cheeks were flushed, your smile was glowing, and even the kids couldn’t take their eyes off you. They were hooked on every word, and so was I. I wish I’d had someone like you around when I was little. I mean… that sounded stupid. It’s just… kids love it when an adult is willing to interact on their level, but you could tell they knew it was amagical event to have the town princess splashing around knee-deep in the water with them.”
I bravely lift my gaze to meet hers. “The size of your heart is obvious at any distance, Cady. You operate in this world from a place of pure love, and it’s an absolute blessing to be anywhere near you. I remember sitting across the pond and thinking that you were everything I could ever want in a woman. What I felt was so much more than a physical attraction, and I’d never had that before. You… you shine like the sun, and it’s a constant struggle to tear myself away before my dark clouds get set upon you. You’re perfection on every level. In that moment, I knew you were so much more than sexy, but my god, did I love seeing your long skirt tucked up in your underwear so it wouldn’t get wet, mud clinging to your calves…”
“Two years?” She flops back into her chair and emits a slow wheezing sound before she speaks. “Two whole years and you’ve done diddly-squat about it?” She’s almost moaning now. “You’re literally never going to act on it, are you? You’re the only one who sees me as anything other than Daddy’s little girl, but I’m still going to die as that shell of a woman they all believe I am.”
Her voice has softened into the barest whisper, but after having seen her all feisty and self-assured, I’m desperate to hear her confidence again. She was a woman on a mission when I came in here.
For whatever reason, she chose today to express her sharp observations with her even sharper tongue. She well and truly called my bluff, because of course I don’t come in here to read outdated books about shit that means nothing to me. She’s known as Beaumont City’s golden angel of chastity, but I know the real Cadence Malone is a woman of intoxicating sensuality — if she could only express it beyond a flash of her eyes or the pout of her lips or the way she chooses to recommend erotic e-books that speak to me about her deepest desires.
The way her eyes see right into my soul and her words slice through all the bullshit? I love it. Whenever I see her shrink into helpless victim mode, I want to do things to her that bring her back to the edge of aggression. If we were naked, I’d have her edged so beautifully, she’d be screaming at me,demandingthe release she needs. Fenced in by the role she’s been given, she never seems to argue or stand up for herself or ask for anything selfish from anyone. I want her to speak up and demand what she wants?—
Like she has with me.
I groan inwardly. She’s literally telling me what she wants. And I’m telling her she can’t have it? Who am I to deny such bravery?
