Page 93 of Lucifer's Mirror
“Anyway, he’s too old for you.”
“I’m an old soul.”
“Just think about all those wrinkles.”
I smile and shake my head. Zayne can always make me feel better. I’m lucky to have him as a friend. “So, did you want something?” I ask.
“You mean when I came across your make-out session with the sexy werewolf?”
“He’s not a werewolf.”
“Now I know you’re in trouble. Actually, I came to tell you I’m leaving.”
Shock punches me in the gut. I knew this was coming. He had warned me, after all, but I’d pushed it to the back of my mind, along with all the other things I don’t want to face right now.
“Is it safe for you to go? You know, the…”
“The fact that I can turn into a fucking great basilisk?”
“I think it’s cool. You can goddamn fly!”
“I know. It is sort of cool. Though it might be a little conspicuous back on Earth.”
“You think?”
“Anyway, Khaosti says I’m good to go. I hate the guy, but he’s helped me a lot. I don’t think I could have done it without him.”
“I’m glad. Not that you’re leaving, but that you’ve got control, and you seem happier about it.”
“Not sure about happier, but I’m coming to terms with it. And Khaosti’s giving me some contacts—others like me back on Earth—when I’m ready.”
It sounds like he’s thought it all through, and I can feel tears pricking my eyes. I blink them back. I’m not going to make him feel guilty. But I have to try one last time. “Do you really have to go?” I don’t want to beg, but I need him.
“I do. I need to check on Josh.”
I know he’s right. I’ve spent so long trying to persuade myself that Josh isn’t my responsibility. And maybe he isn’t, but in the short time he’s been in our lives, he’s carved a place in my heart. I remember him that night on the garage roof, telling me he loves me, and I couldn’t say it back. Now I have an overwhelming need to tell him I do love him. He is my brother, just like Zayne is. But I can’t go back. I’ll just bring danger down on everyone I know, including Josh. So I don’t have a choice, but Zayne does. And I have to stop making it harder for him.
“I know,” I say.
“Amber, there’s nothing for me here. This is all about you. And honestly, I can’t bear to see you with that fucker.” He gives a rueful smile. “Don’t worry, I’ll get over it. I just need a little time and space.” He opens his arms. “Are you going to give your favorite brother a goodbye hug?”
I step into his arms, and he wraps them around me, making me feel safe. It’s the exact opposite of what I felt in Khaosti’s arms. I’m crazy. Why can’t I want Zayne like that?
I rest my head on his chest and listen to his heartbeat. Finally, he shifts and puts me away from him. “I have to go.”
Once again shock hits me. “You’re leavingnow?”
“That’s what I came to tell you. Hecate has arranged for a guide to take me to a mirror. It’s a few hours’ ride, and if we leave now, he can take me and make it back by nightfall.”
“You know how to get through?” I’m really hoping he says no.
He nods, and I press my lips together then swallow. “Then you’d better go.”
“You won’t come and see me off?”
I shake my head. “I can’t.” I sniff. I’m going to lose it, and there goes my tough girl image.
He stares at me for long moments, and I know I’ve disappointed him. Then he gives another nod, turns, and walks away.
