Thea’s breath shuddered in her chest. He was in love with her.
“I know it sounds crazy, and I don’t want to frighten you, but I think about you constantly. Just breathing the same air as you makes me happy. I’m not known for expressing my feelings, but this weekend, last night, was incredible. All I ever hoped for. I think we could be something good. Together.”
Thea stared straight ahead, the dappled light from the treescasting shadows onto her thighs through the sunroof. She thought back to the hours she’d spent alone at his hotel. The backseat she’d taken while he did his business thing. The feeling of being subject to someone else’s whims. Was that what she wanted?
They’d had fantastic sex. She’d never forget the things they did or the way he’d made her feel. But there were so many reasons that anything other than sex was a bad idea. And was he thinking clearly about Lucas? There were obvious issues with his mum. Any more upheaval and drama like today would be worse for him.
Thea wrapped her arms around her body. “This weekend. The time with you. It was incredible, but there’s so much that I need to figure out. Thatyouneed to figure out. I never factored in your ex, and then there’s how different we are. How different our lives are.”
“We’re not that different.”
Thea gave a wry smile. “You spend your days in suits, on the phone, ordering people around, making things happen, making money. I spend my days shovelling poo and breaking up fights between goats. My life is mayhem. We’re chalk and cheese.”
“But that doesn’t mean we couldn’t work it out,” he pleaded, running his fingers through his hair. “I can’t remember the last time I smiled so much.” Felix’s voice tapered off.
Thea closed her eyes. He made her smile, too, but was she truly happy? She was excited when she thought of him, but wasn’t that just the sex? The idea of having someone to hold if she wanted?
She hadn’t thought much past this weekend. Not about happy ever afters and roses around the door. She’d forget to water them, anyway. If she was going to consider a relationship with someone, they had to be the sort of man who’d stand by her in the chaos of her life. Understand what drove her to worklong hours covered in dirt and smells. Felix didn’t even seem to like animals. He hated her geese for a start. And he wasn’t someone Phil would approve of. Phil would want her to be happy, but with someone who cared for the Sanctuary just like he had.
“What are you thinking?” he asked, his voice a whisper.
A line of perspiration beaded along her upper lip, and Thea ran her hands down her jeans, wishing she’d packed something cooler to wear. “That I need time to think. Today has been a lot.”
Felix played with the arms of his sunglasses in his lap. “I’m sorry. I should have asked Adrienne to leave straight away.”
“At least now I know everything you should have told me earlier.”
Felix sucked in his lips and looked at his hands, his gold watch catching the sun and casting a bright spot of light onto the car’s leather interior. “I know. But If I’d told you what she was like, you’d never have given us a chance. We’d only have had this conversation sooner. Before, well, before last night. Like I said. She poisons everything good in my life.”
Thea shook her head, an ache settling in her chest. “What a mess. I need to get home. Please, take me home.”
After a long pause, Felix nodded. He put on his sunglasses and drove back onto the road.
A waveof calm washed over Thea when they pulled into the yard at Small Oaks. Every cobble, every stone of the house was familiar. Everything was spotless, thanks to Kitty, of course, and across the way, little noses pressed against the glass of Daniel’s kitten cabin. Even though she’d only been away for two days, the residents all looked bigger. Her lips bowed. She’d spend the afternoon playing with them.
Felix stopped a little from the house, turned off the engine, and met her gaze. His eyes were the softest sage as they searched her face. He opened his mouth to speak. “Thea.”
The low burr of his voice rocked into her chest. He looked so unsure, so vulnerable. She’d never seen him like this before. Never thought him capable.
“I need to…”
“Mummy!” squealed a muffled voice from outside.
Thea turned her head to see Ammy racing out of the kitten cabin, blonde hair and a pink fairy dress trailing behind her. She had bright red cheeks and clutched what looked like a cheese sandwich in one hand.
Without hesitation, Thea reached for the door handle and opened it, swinging her legs down to the ground. She crouched low and opened her arms, ready to catch the incoming hug. Ammy flew into her, almost bowling her over, and Thea breathed her in, all floral shampoo, cookies and butter. Her heart swelled fit to burst.
“Mummy! Let me go. You’re squishing me,” giggled Ammy, wriggling in her arms.
With a kiss to the top of Ammy’s head, Thea loosened her hug, took her hand and stood. Felix appeared behind her, carrying her corn-on-the-cob bag. He must have retrieved it from the boot.
“Felix!” squeaked Ammy. She tugged her hand out of Thea’s and skipped towards him, throwing her body at his legs and wrapping her arms around his thighs.
Thea glanced up at his face. His eyes were wide, and he too struggled to keep upright under the assault, but after a long beat, a smile ticked up on the corners of his mouth.
“Hello,” he said, reaching down to touch her shoulder.
Ammy looked up at him, her toothy grin on full display, and Thea’s gut lurched. The look of pure adoration on her daughter’s face, the trusting smile, made her skin prickle. If anyonehad asked her what Ammy liked about Felix, she probably would have said she admired his superior car technology or that he was happy to give her late-night piggybacks.
