“What’s up?”
“Gemma has informed me that I didn’t call you on Christmas and I have neglected my familial duties as a result.” He paused, and I could just imagine cute but terrifying Gemma glaring at him. “Belated Merry Christmas.”
I puffed out a white cloud. “Merry Christmas, Knox.”
“Did you… was Spencer there with you?” Knox trying to make conversation was an absolute riot. I would have to send Gemma a thank you card for the entertainment.
“Yeah, he was,” I replied with a grin. “I meant to call you and demand if you knew about him barging into my life. I assume he consulted you at some point.”
“He did,” Knox confirmed. “I felt it was prudent given both of your circumstances. And he’d been wanting to open a practice somewhere.”
“Ah, you knew about that, too,” I grumbled. I stared at my boots, the snow whitewashed in bright moonlight. My feet stayed dry even while I dragged my feet through the snow and kicked at it as I walked.
“Of course, I did. I offered to finance the damn project.”
I froze, lifting my head to stare ahead in shock. “You offered him funds for his practice?”
“Provided that he opened it in Park City, yeah. What—ow. Why are you hitting me?” I thought I heard a scuffle on the other side of the phone call, but my ears were ringing, and I couldn’t make myself care if Gemma was trying to shut my brother up.
My forehead creased, and slowly, I asked, “Why?”
For once, Knox seemed tongue-tied. “It was—well, we both thought given your predicament, if he was out there—Honestly, Ara, it was a good investment. Spencer will do well, and I was just trying to be useful to the… effort.”
I was going to be sick. “You… bribed Spencer to help me?”
“No,” he denied swiftly. “No, I didn’t bribe Spencer. He wanted to help. It was just an unconventional ask on my end, so I promised I would help if he went out there…” he trailed off. “That still sounds bad. It wasn’t. He did want to help you.”
“You asked him to marry me? And then bribed him with seed money to entice him to follow through?” I had stopped in the middle of the path, my eyes on the warm yellow lights of the house ahead and my stomach leaden.
I heard Gemma groan in the background of the call. Knox sounded chagrined as he replied, “I suppose I did. Let me beclear, Ara—I offered. He never took the money, and I really doubt he wi—”
“But he could,” I said. “He could take it still. It’s available to him.”
“I—It’s… yeah.”
“I have to go.” I felt like I was breathing through a straw.
“Arabella.” Knox got that stern voice he used when I was being difficult. “Spencer gave up everything to be out there for you. Not money.”
“Okay.” I hung up.
Oh, this hurt. Breathing sharply, I clutched my open coat together and willed myself to breathe through the pain that stabbed my chest and churned in my gut. “Oh,” I breathed out loud, lowering to a crouch. “Oh, this hurts. This really hurts.”
Knox had given Spencer money in exchange for marrying me. For coming out here. For taking care of me. For being kind to me and taking pity on me and convincing me for one pathetic second that I was worthy of gentle things. I really was the most pitiable person imaginable.
I gripped my hair by its roots, crouching in the snow and staring at the glittering, crystalized surface. “No, think this through,” I breathed out. “Arabella, do not panic. Do not panic.” I sucked in five deep breaths, letting them out slowly. “He hasn’t taken the money,” I rationalized. “And he—he isn’t the kind of person to do things for money. You know this about him.”
A touch of cooling logic soothed some of the hurt. Spencer wasn’t the kind of person to fake sincerity and kindness. He was better than that—and more to the point, he wouldn’t have gone to the lengths he had to ensure my happiness just because my brother had offered him some seed money.
But.
It did make sense that Knox had convinced him to do this for me. It did make sense that he would feel enticed to come outhere if he knew he could open a practice with financial back-up. It did make sense that his motivation for being here was Knox and not me. It did make perfect sense that he felt an obligation to be here with me.
I don’t want you to get the wrong idea about it.
Ah, God. He’d known this would upset me. That was what he’d been hiding, that he’d been offered money to marry me and help me. He hadn’t wanted me to get the wrong idea. Except it wasn’t thewrongidea. It was the right idea, nauseatingly.
I groaned, shifting my hands from my hair to my face. “God, this hurts,” I squeezed out again. To no one. Because truly, I was alone. I was meant to be. Or, at least, it was all I had ever known. The only love I had been shown had always been contingent upon money. My mother’s love had always centered around money, and my father had loved his money and his freedom far more than he ever loved me.
