“He cheated on you, Ma,” I spoke somberly, causing her to stiffen. “I don’t mean to bring up the past, but how could you be with someone who disrespected you?”
It’s been two days since I’ve heard from my alleged fiancé, and I’m not mad about it. The night after the event, he dropped me off at my condo with promises of calling me the next morning. Call it my intuition, but I knew the “work” he had to tend to was another woman. Whether it was Angelina or his secretary, I knew all about him and his extra-curricular activities.
“When your father and I met, he was young,” my mother began speaking as she snapped me from my thoughts. “He was making a name for himself in the corporate world, and women always threw themselves at him. I didn’t care because he made it clear he only had eyes for me. I fell in love with how he treated me and protected me.” She dropped her head for a second before she continued, “After I had Rosier and Jules, I found out who and what your father truly was. I refused to raise two small children on my own, so I had to come to terms with what the life I chose entailed. I knew there would be women; I didn’t seeit with my own eyes, but I accepted it. My only demand of him was to not bring me a disease, outside children, or women to my door. He never disrespected me in public, and at home, I was the queen of his castle.”
“Mama, that’s not what I want…” I felt tears well in my eyes, and I kicked myself for becoming emotional. “I want a man who loves me and only me. Just because we live this life doesn’t mean we don’t deserve faithfulness and to be cherished. Why do I have to live my life in misery? I don’t want this!”
Placing my head in my hands, the levee finally broke. I couldn’t help but feel as if being tied to a man who cheats at every turn was a life sentence I didn’t deserve. Feeling the swing dip, I felt my mother wrap her arms around me. Pulling me into her embrace, I placed my head on her shoulder and cried.
“It’s okay, baby girl.” She hugged me tightly, and I could feel the sadness in her voice. “I know this isn’t the life you saw for yourself, but you knew what being a part of this family would require. Chandler may not be the man you saw yourself with, but do you think you can learn to love him?”
“I despise him, Ma.” I sniffled as I wiped my eyes and sat up. “The man speaks to me as if I should be thankful for him allowing me in his presence. Not only that, but the way he flirts with women when I’m around is so disrespectful. I know for a fact he’s been shacked up with a woman for the past two days. He’s blatantly doing this in front of me as if it’s okay. My relationship will soon become a public spectacle because of his behavior, and I don’t like that.”
“I’ll speak with him.” We both jumped and looked toward the door at the sound of my brother’s voice. “One thing I’m not going to tolerate is him parading around publicly with other women as if he doesn’t have a wife at home.”
Saying nothing, I watched as my brother stepped onto the back patio with a menacing look. I haven’t spoken to Rosier inweeks, and if I thought there was a chance of running into him today, I wouldn’t have come over here.
“I don’t need you to do anything for me!” I snapped, moving from my mother’s embrace. “You’re the reason I’m in this mess now, so forgive me for not wanting your unsolicited help.”
With worried eyes, my mother looked back and forth between me and her oldest son. Never taking his eyes off me, he bent down to kiss my mother’s cheek before standing to his full height. Stuffing his hands in his slacks, he squinted his eyes and glared at me.
“Who are you talking to, Noemi?” he said calmly, but I knew he was anything but. “Because I know it’s not me.”
“Actually, I am.” I stood from my seat and stepped to him. “You’re ruining my life, and you don’t even care! You threw me off to a man who does nothing but disrespect and cheat on me!”
Coming closer, I had no choice but to crane my neck to look up at him. The heaving of his chest let me know I was pushing buttons that had severe consequences, but I didn’t care.
He gritted through clenched teeth, struggling to hold his restraint. “Sister or not, watch who the fuck you’re talking to. You will respect me as head of this Family and the decisions that I have made. You know what the fuck it means being in a family like this, and you’ve always known an arrangement for marriage was a possibility. I know you’re angry, but you will watch what the fuck you say when you’re talking to me or?—”
“Or what?” I stepped back and chuckled. “You’re going to take me to your little zoo and feed me to the gorillas? Cut my tongue and hands off? Maybe you’ll just kill?—”
“Enough, Noemi!” my mother shouted as she stepped in between us. “I will not have this behavior between you two in my home! You will sit and talk about your differences like siblings should.”
“He’s not my brother; he’s my dictator,” I stated in a growl as tears slid down my cheeks. Turning, I reached back and snatched my purse from the table. It was time I left before I said something I couldn’t take back. The way I was feeling, I didn’t care if I did. “You’re no better than our father, Rosier, and I hope for your kids’ sake, you change your ways before one day you end up ruining their lives too.”
My heart beat rapidly in my chest as I spewed the words that I knew would hurt my brother to his core. For a split second, I could see in his eyes what I did before it was gone. Removing his hands from his pockets, he clenched them into fists as he shot daggers my way.
“As I’ve stated, you will do what’s been required of you, or there will be consequences.” He grabbed my arm and jerked me toward him. “Am I clear?”
“Crystal.” I nodded as more tears fell. “Anything for the Family,Boss. That’s all that matters to you anyway. You can reach me on my business line when needed. My personal line is for the people who give a fuck about me.”
Snatching from his embrace, I marched through my mother’s home, ignoring her pleas for me to come back. Another minute in my brother’s presence, and one of us would end up being buried next week. As I made my way outside to my Audi, I slammed the door shut after falling inside and sobbed. I bawled for the happily ever after I’d never have, and I cried over the loss of my brother. The relationship Rosier and I once shared was long gone. He wanted to be head of the family with no regard for the big brother that I needed him to be when it came to my happiness.
Once I got myself together, I decided to go to my home on the compound instead of the condo. Chandler only had access to me there, so that’s where I spent most nights. Now, I wanted to be in my own space where I felt most like myself. I wanted to be inthe only place I knew I was safe from all the sorrows and worries that had become my world. The more I thought about the agony I was in, the more my heart hurt.
Pulling into my driveway, I placed the car in park and exhaled. I closed my eyes and tried my hardest to get myself together. My heart was broken, and I was exhausted. I needed a mental break, or I was going to succumb to the stress I was under. Bypassing the several missed calls from my mother, I disconnected every app that would allow them to track me. Before powering down my phone, my heart thumped as I went to my contacts. Finding the name of the one person I wanted to speak to, I took a chance and sent a text.
Me:
I need you.
Jordan:
I’m on the way.
After reading his response, I breathed a sigh of relief before cutting my phone off. In my moment of distress, all I wanted was him, and to know he would drop it all and come to me after not speaking for months spoke volumes. My life was in shambles right now, and Jordan was the only one I wanted to be around. Gathering my things to get out of the car, I prepared myself for his arrival. He wasn’t a man of many words, but when he spoke, you listened. This time, I needed someone to hear what I had to say. He would let me vent with no judgment, and that’s what I need. I didn’t care about the Family and what they wanted from me at the moment.
Right now, I need someone to listen to me. I wanted to be in the company of someone who cared about me and not my duty to our family obligations.
