And now he’s trying to take my job away from me just like my father. I love working here. I love what I’m doing. I love the people. And I’m a making a difference. Plus, I’ll never find a salary like this elsewhere. I’m not just struggling to get by, I’m living.
“I’m sorry, Skully. I’m sorry for what happened to you. And I’m sorry that I can’t fix it. But I’m not sorry for the way I feel about you. And I’m not going to quit. This job, this place, these men… They’re my family now. If you don’t want to be a part of my family, I’m not going to force you. But I’m not walking away. And just so you know, I’ll never move on. My heart will always be yours. You don’t have to accept that, but it’s my truth.”
I snatch the box up and turn, storming out of the room and slamming his door. I go straight down to Shayna’s room, needing my friend. She’s looking in her full-length mirror at the outfit she has on and there’s a pile of clothes on her bed like she’s been trying on clothes. I wonder where she’s going. She looks so pretty. But she’s always pretty.
“Can I come in?”
Her eyes shift in the mirror, and as soon as she sees me, she turns, rushing over.
“What happened, Mads? What’s wrong?”
What’s wrong is the guy who just broke my heart again. He’s so determined to push me away that he can’t even see how good it is between us. He won’t let me in, and I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m trying to fight for him, to fight for us, but I’m losing hope.
“He gave me this.” I hold out the box. “And then he told me to leave him alone and to find someone else to take him his packages. Oh”—and I can’t forget—“and he told me I should start looking for another job so we can both move on with our lives.”
“So, he’s trying to push you away again?” Exactly. “And what’s this?” She looks into the box, but the dildo got buried in the packing peanuts on my way down to her room.
“My parting gift,” I state.
She goes to her bed and digs out the plastic cock. “He gave you a dildo?” She looks and sounds just as horrified as I am. And here I thought we were going to have some fun together. But nope, that’s the only dick I’m going to get from him from now on.
“Yep. He told me if I need a release, I should use that instead of knocking on his door.”
He failed to remember the fact that he was the one who snuck into my room and forced his mouth between my legs.
“Wow. I hate to say this because I know he’s been through a lot, but he’s an asshole.”
“I don’t disagree.”
“You know what I think?” She stiffens her chin. “I think he’s spooked by his feelings and is trying to push you away so he doesn’t have to face them.”
I think that’s obvious, but what I don’t know is how to break through the chains that are holding him back. If he’s insecure about his disability, he shouldn’t be. If he thinks I deserve some fancy life, I don’t. I never wanted anything other than him.
“Okay, so then what do I do?”
“You give him exactly what he wants. I’ll start delivering his boxes to him. And you start fucking that dildo, loud enough for him to hear you every night. If I had to put money on it, I’d say he’ll be breaking down your door before the week’s up.”
Based on how he just acted in his room, I’m not so sure.
“I’m serious, Mads.” She squeezes my hands, just like she always does. Always so supportive and kind. Always having my back. “Let him miss you. Let him fight foryoufor a change. You’re so damn amazing, and as soon as you start ignoring his grumpy ass, it’s going to eat him alive. And if he doesn’t break, if he doesn’t bust down your door and claim you, then he’s an idiot and you’re better off letting him go.”
God, I hope she’s right. But as the days pass, and the knock never comes, my hope fades.
And every day it gets harder and harder to get up and go into the office. Maybe it’s time to start looking for another job. It hurts too much to be here.
17
Skully
It’s like going through withdrawal. I break out into a sweat. My body practically shaking. The need so fucking intense I feel like I’m going to lose my mind. And I don’t even get my daily fix anymore. Shayna is the one who brings me my packages now. I still order shit daily in hopes it will be Maddy knocking on my door, but she doesn’t come. For once, she fucking listened to me.
There’s another crash outside followed by a burst of laughter. The music is blaring loud tonight. The guys are having a party. And damn, if I couldn’t use a drink, but I’m not going out to face the crowd. I heard Maddy leave her room earlier, so I know she’s out there with the guys. She’s probably having a good fucking time too. Drinking, dancing, flirting with my brothers. It’s another reason I stay locked inside this room. If I go out and see one of them groping her, her sweet face smiling up at them, I’m liable to pull my gun and put a bullet in his head.
Finally, I hear heels clicking down the hall followed by a giggle. Her giggle. It was always one of the sweetest sounds. A sound I’d live for. Her door opens and then closes, and I’m praying she’s alone. I press my ear to the wall, listening. A pair of shoes drop, then there’s the sound of a zipper sliding down. Another soft giggle has me pressing my ear closer, it’s cut short by a hiccup. I think my girl is drunk. Thankfully, it doesn’t sound like there’s anyone else in there with her. Thank fuck because I’d be grabbing my piece and puttin’ an end to the fucker’s life.
The squeak of her bed has me breathing a sigh of relief because now I can stop worrying about her. I trust my men, but I don’t know who the fuck they have here tonight. The hangarounds wouldn’t have a fucking clue who that girl belongs to, and one look at her and they’d be trying to make a play to get into her pants. And since I cut her loose, told her to move on, she might be so inclined to do what I fucking told her.
I’m about to roll myself back, needing to quit my obsession, but then I hear it. Her soft whimper followed by a gasped intake of air. I press my ear so close to the wall the cartilage starts to hurt.
