“No. Stop it.” Maddie forces my shoulders to straighten, and I look at her. “You are beautiful. Don’t hide it.”
“I think you’re saying it wrong. Crew calls it ‘bootyful’.”
She rolls her eyes, then smacks my rear. “That too. Now can we please get out of here?” She cringes. “I can feel these cinderblock walls closing in on me.”
I chuckle. Ever since high school, she’s been afraid of public restrooms. But I have yet to figure out why.
When we make it back to the soccer field, I brave the fear and walk right up to Ward. Let him see me for all that I am. Unflattering curves and all. This is me, the strong woman I’m trying to be.
“Hey.” I capture his attention, and it goes straight to my legs. My stomach drops to around the same spot.
His brow furrows. “Are those new pants?”
“Yep.”
He still looks confused, and against my better judgment, I decide to fill him in.
“I’m a mom, and moms sometimes pee their pants. This is literally what you get if you bring me to your family’s dinner and want to date me. Fake or not.” All my cards are on the table. I’m broken, I’m a mess, and on top of all that, I have a leaky bladder.
If he’s fazed by my confession, he doesn’t show it. “Okay.”
“Okay?”That’s it?“That’s all you’re going to say after seeing all this?” I motion to my rear, and his eyes follow.
Red creeps up his cheeks and he coughs. “I don’t know what you want me to say.”
“Say I look hot or tell me if I look disgusting.” I grunt.
He shakes his head in slow motion and he scans down my body again, his eyes scorching every inch of me. “You don’t look disgusting.”
“Ugh. You’re the worst fake boyfriend ever.” I turn and stomp away, hoping his gaze doesn’t follow me. Or maybe I want it too. I don’t know. I confused myself.
“Told you he’d like the pants,” Maddie says, fanning her face with her phone. She looks like she belongs on a beach with her sandals, sunglasses, and wide-brimmed hat, being fanned with large leaves by the muscly lifeguards on duty.
“He didn’t say anything about my pants.” I settle into my lawn chair and focus on Crew. Who is currently on the ground.Is he pulling up worms?
“I could read his eyes, hon, and believe me,” Maddie wiggles her eyebrows, “he said some things.”
My face burns, and Maddie laughs. It doesn’t stop my stomach from fluttering like it belongs to a fourteen-year-old girl.
I’m a sucker. A fool.
That’s what my mom said the first time I fell for a boy. I was in eighth grade at the time and looking back, I can see she was right.
Now, I’m a fool again. Falling for a guy who is only dating me because he doesn’t want to date. Stupid. Gatsby was wrong, being a fool is not the best thing a woman can be. That’s how we get taken advantage of.
Oh, how I was a fool with Rodney.
I let him into my life once and now I’ll never be able to escape him. Whether I like it or not, Crew is forever attached to him. What if Crew needs a kidney someday and I’m not a match, or what if Crew decides he wants to meet his father when he grows up and hates me for keeping them from each other?
I’ll never truly be free of Rodney. That knowledge only adds the burn on top of this miserably hot day. By the time the game is over, I’m pretty sure my entire body is five shades redder than my hair.
“I need ten gallons of ice water on my head. Right now,” I complain to Maddie as we pick up our stuff.
“Well, that would be tasteful.”
I freeze. That wasn’t Maddie’s voice.
I swivel slowly and come face to face with Ward’s mother. “Ms. Preston.”
