Page 87 of The Spirit of Love
It hurts my heart a little to see how good we look together in this picture. But as a newly initiated TV director, I know how much smoke and mirrors cameras can capture. Tricks of light. Frozen frames that capture just a moment and not their subjects’ full complexities.
Even if this picturelookslike what I want, it’s not what Jude and I actually have.
“What am I doing?” I wonder aloud.
“You’re in the middle of telling us about kissing Jude last night,” Olivia prompts. “Set the stage. Who kissed who? Against what surface? How far did you go—”
“Is there any chance you’re pregnant?” Masha asks.
“Ladies,” Jake says. “Let Fenny tell it her way.”
“Looking back,” I say, “it may have been building for weeks.”
“Ya think?” Eli says under his breath.
“Shut it,” Masha says to him.
“We’ve been working so closely together, getting along so well. Having fun. Yesterday’s shoot was…”
I look at my friends, windblown and hanging on the edge of the yacht’s railing for me to complete that sentence.
“Not without its drama—”
“Itis Zombie Hospital,” Olivia says with a knowing laugh.
“I wish you could have seen it, Liv,” I say.
“Me, too, babe.”
“Buster nailed the climax scene. The whole cast and crew were in great spirits when we wrapped for the day. I used to think directing made a person so untouchable, so removed from the rest of the cast. Jude made me see it differently. The way he brought me in when he was directing inspired me to bring in as many people as possible yesterday when I was. The whole cast was tremendous, and if I had anything to do with it, I’m grateful. I never would even have had that chance if it wasn’t for Jude. I mean, actually…I would have…if we’d never met, but…you know what I mean.”
“You mean you’re glad you met,” Eli said.
“Jude went above and beyond, going to bat for you yesterday,” Masha said. “And he knew, like we all knew, that you’d crush it.”
“And then…” Olivia prompts.
I nod. “Well, we had an argument on set. That’s not breaking news, but something about this one felt different. It rubbed me raw. And then he came over to apologize, and we went out on the canals in my canoe. We tried to kiss on the water, but instead the two of us and his dog went overboard.”
“WHAT.” Olivia starts laughing.
I tell my friends how we both surfaced under the canoe and started laughing, how we swam to shore and wrung out our embarrassed asses, then dashed to my place to dry off. And how we tried that kiss again.
I sigh. “Everything about it felt right.”
I pause, realizing I’ve just hit on the truth. I close my eyes.
“But?” Masha prompts me after a minute.
“But he stopped. Because he said I needed to figure out what’s going on with Sam.”
“Wow,” Jake says. “I knew I liked Jude.”
“Which brings us to now,” Olivia says. “That’swhy you’re here?”
I nod.
“So what do you want to be going on with Sam?” Masha asks.
