Page 74 of The Spirit of Love
I’m pretty sure I never told him Sam was a phenomenal lover.
“We did have chemistry,” I say.
Jude stiffens in my arms. “I’m failing to see the problem.”
I sigh. “Me, too.”
“You still have feelings for him?”
“It’s confusing. This all happened very recently.”
Jude nods. “So why isn’t he here with you tonight? Why me?”
“Jude?” The waify woman with the hummingbird hat suddenly flings her arms around Jude’s neck and sways. “Hiiiiiiii!”
Hummingbird’s grip on Jude is so tight, and has landed right on top of mine, so it makes it impossible for me to pull away.
Now we’re a threesome dancing to U2.
“I didn’t see you during the ceremony!” she sings.
“Maybe because he was lost in your hat,” I mutter, finally extricating myself.
I study Jude’s visitor. In her sequined dress and minimalist makeup, she’s one of those sculpted, highlighted LA types who could be either twenty-three or forty-three.
“It’s Tania,” she says, pressing a hand to the keyhole of exposed cleavage in her dress. “Do you remember?”
“Of course,” Jude says slowly, his eyes moving toward me as I take a step back. “We shared that—”
“Unforgettable connection.” She winks at him. Now she glances for a fraction of a second at me. “Listen, I don’t want to interrupt—”
Jude gestures at me. “Oh. No. We were just—”
“I saw you from across the room,” Tania says, “and Ihadto come tell you”—here she drops her voice and giggles—“I did thething. Remember? What we talked about? What you said I wasmade for?” She swats him playfully across the chest. “You changed my life, JDS!”
“Surely not.” He laughs, embarrassed.
Tania looks at me. “He is so humble.”
“Is that the word?” I say.
I can’t help noticing the interest with which Jude is looking at this woman. And why wouldn’t he? She’s sexy, vibrant, and, yes, makes bizarre hat choices, but who cares when she’s got keyholes full of cleavage and is so clearly into Jude? He’s lookingat her the way I might look at a new near-death experience publication, as if, finally,thisone might betheone to unlock all the mysteries of the universe.
I don’t know why I’m jealous. Is it because Jude has very clearly hooked up with this Tania person? Jealousy toward Tania would make no sense. Jude and I are just friends, and just barely at that. It’s been, what, six days since I stopped hating him? And forty seconds ago, I was extolling my incredible chemistry with Sam. I have no claim on Jude. I’ve barely even thought about him that way. At least not for a full, extended fantasy or anything.
And now my mind is going to all the stupid places…
What would Lorena say if she wasn’t tangoing on dangerous plexiglass with her elegant date right now? Would she say that I’m not jealous of the sexual tension between Tania and Jude? That actually, I’m jealous because I want Sam to look at me the way Jude and Tania are looking at each other?
“I’ll let you get back to dancing,” Tania tells us both, taking Jude briefly by the lapels. “But you have my number.Call me. Make. That. Move.”
And then she’s gone, but Jude doesn’t put his arms back around me, and I don’t put my arms back around him. A waiter passes and we both grab more champagne and chug it down.
“She seems nice,” I finally say.
“Yeah,” he says. “Um. What were we talking about before?”
“The periodic table, I think.”
